The Best Chuck McGill Quotes

[to Jimmy]
Chuck: No one ever accused you of being lazy... every other sin in the book, but not that one.

[to Kim]
Chuck: If it makes you feel any better, you're not the first person to go out on a limb for him. I made the same mistake over and over again. And now Howard has... And he blames you. It's a damned mess.

Chuck: You're not a real lawyer!

Jimmy: I'm impressed by how much work went into entrapping me. You went all out.
Chuck: [On the witness stand] I didn't entrap you. I provoked an admission in adverse interests. That's not the same thing.

- I'm gonna go call Howard.
Chuck: Jimmy.
- You do realise you just confessed to a felony?
Jimmy: I guess.
- But you feel better, right?
- Besides, it's your word against mine.

Jimmy: It was a simple, little commercial. It aired once... that's all. And can I remind you... it worked. It worked like a dream.
Chuck: See, that's your problem, Jimmy... thinking the ends justify the means. And you're forever shocked when it all blows up in your face.
Jimmy: What did I do that was so wrong?
Chuck: You broke the rules.

Chuck: Coming.
- Hey.
Howard: Catch you at a bad time?
- Not at all. Come in.
- I hear clinking.
- Does that mean we have something to celebrate?
- We sure do.

Chuck: Ground yourself?
- Jimmy, did you ground yourself?

- Getting dark.
- I hate to say it, but I think it might be time to kill the lights.
- Oh, yes, sir. Of course.
Chuck: You sure I can't make you a cup of tea?
- David: I'm fine, sir. Thank you.
Chuck: All right, then.

[about Jimmy]
Chuck: In high school, he had a thriving business making fake IDs so his buddies could buy beer.
Jimmy: You going all the way back to high school, huh?
Chuck: Hey, you and Mozart, huh? You both started young.

[first lines]
Jimmy: [about nearby electrical transformer] Don't worry about that, all right? Look down. Look at the grass. Kick off your shoes like this. When was the last time you did that? Feels good, right? Yeah. Grass between your toes. Feels nice. Yeah.
Chuck: Yeah. Well, I think maybe Maybe it's time we go in. We got a lot of work to do. We need to get ready. *You* need to get ready.

[first lines]
Jail: Name?
Chuck: Charles McGill. Client visit.

Howard: It's very possible... it's likely that we're losing Mesa Verde.
Chuck: Losing them? We just got them! Why? Where are they going?
Howard: They're going with Kim Wexler. She left the firm.
Chuck: Kim left? Oh, Howard. Well, where is she going? Is it Rich Schweikart? Or did Reeves and Green get her?
Howard: No. Not another firm. She's going into private practice.
Chuck: What? Well, that's completely... How is she going out on her own? *Why* is she going out on her own?
Howard: Well, the why is the why. The how is that she's pooling her resources... with Jimmy.
Chuck: Kim and my brother... partners at law.
[shakes head]
Chuck: He's Svengali. The man is Svengali.

Chuck: [in a feeble tone] You're not a real lawyer.
Saul: I'm *what*?
Chuck: [now raising his voice defiantly] You're not a real lawyer! "University of American Samoa", for Christ's sake? An online course? What a joke! I worked my ass off to get where I am! And you take these shortcuts and you think suddenly you're my peer? You do what I do because you're funny and you can make people laugh? I committed my *life* to this! You don't slide into it like a cheap pair of slippers and then reap all the rewards!
Saul: I thought you were proud of me.
Chuck: I was! When you straightened out and got a job in the mail room, I was *very* proud!
Saul: So that's it, then, right? Keep ol' Jimmy down in the mail room, 'cause he's not good enough to be a lawyer.
Chuck: I know you. I know what you were, what you are. People don't change. You're Slippin' Jimmy! And Slippin' Jimmy I can handle just fine, but Slippin' Jimmy with a law degree is like a chimp with a machine gun! The law is sacred! If you abuse that power, people get hurt! This is not a game. You have to know on some level, I know you know I'm right. You know I'm right!

Chuck: I am not crazy! I know he swapped those numbers. I knew it was 1216. One after Magna Carta. As if I could ever make such a mistake. Never. Never! I just - I just couldn't prove it. He covered his tracks, he got that idiot at the copy shop to lie for him. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He's done worse. That billboard! Are you telling me that a man just happens to fall like that? No! *He* orchestrated it! Jimmy! He *defecated* through a *sunroof*! And I saved him! And I shouldn't have. I took him into my own firm! What was I *thinking*? He'll never change. He'll *never* change! Ever since he was 9, *always* the same! Couldn't keep his hands out of the cash drawer! But not our Jimmy! Couldn't be precious *Jimmy*! Stealing them blind! And *HE* gets to be a lawyer? What a sick joke! I should've stopped him when I had the chance!

Chuck: I am not crazy! I'm not crazy! I know he swapped those numbers! I knew it was 1216, one after Magna Carta as if I could ever make such a mistake. Never, Never! I just - I just couldn't prove it. He - he covered his tracks, he got that idiot at the copy shop to lie for him. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He's done worse. That billboard! Are you telling me that a man just happens to fall like that? No! He orchestrated it! Jimmy! He defecated through a sunroof! And I saved him! And I shouldn't have. I took him into my own firm! What was I thinking? He'll never change. He'll never change! Ever since he was 9, always the same! Couldn't keep his hands out of the cash drawer! But not our Jimmy! Couldn't be precious Jimmy! Stealing them blind! And he gets to be a lawyer? What a sick joke! I should've stopped him when I had the chance! And you - you have to stop him!

- I'm gonna go call Howard.
Chuck: Jimmy.
- You do realise you just confessed to a felony?
Jimmy: I guess.
- But you feel better, right?
- Besides, it's your word against mine.

Jimmy: Something happened, and it made me think about what went down between you and me and... I wanted to say, in hindsight, I could've made different choices.
Chuck: Is that so?
Jimmy: Yeah. I mean, I'm not saying it's all on me. It's not. But if I had to do it all over again, I would maybe do some things differently. And I just thought you should know that.
Chuck: That you have regrets?
Jimmy: Yeah. I have regrets.
Chuck: Hmm. Why?
Jimmy: 'Cause you're my brother. There aren't that many of us McGills left and, uh, I think we should stick together.
Chuck: No. Why have regrets at all? What's the point?
Jimmy: What do you mean?
Chuck: Well, look at you. You're in so much pain. Why are you putting yourself through all this?
Jimmy: 'Cause I wanted to tell you...
Chuck: That you have regrets. And I'm telling you: don't bother. What's the point? You're just gonna keep hurting people.
Jimmy: That's not true.
Chuck: Jimmy, this is what you do. You hurt people, over and over and over. And then there's this show of remorse.
Jimmy: It's not a "show".
Chuck: I know you don't think it's a show. I don't doubt your emotions are real. But what's the point of all the sad faces and the gnashing of teeth? If you're not going to change your behavior, and you won't...
Jimmy: I can change.
Chuck: Why don't you skip the whole exercise? In the end, you're going to hurt everyone around you. You can't help it. So stop apologizing and accept it. Embrace it. Frankly, I'd have more respect for you if you did.
Jimmy: What about you, Chuck? You didn't do anything wrong? You're just an innocent victim?
Chuck: Let me put your mind at ease, Jimmy. You don't have to make up with me. We don't have to understand each other. Things are fine the way they are. Hey... I don't want to hurt your feelings, but the truth is, you've never mattered all that much to me.
[Chuck turns his back on Jimmy and sits behind his desk to resume his work. Jimmy remains frozen for a moment, stunned, injured, then he slowly and weakly begins to walk out of the room. Just before exiting, he turns to look at him one final time to find him still working, ignoring him, throwing a quick glance his direction to see if he's left yet. Jimmy then silently turns around and makes his departure, permanently wounded from his brother's hurtful words]

Chuck: My brother is not a bad person. He has a good heart. It's just... he can't help himself. And everyone's left picking up the pieces.

Saul: *You* called him. You called Hamlin. I always turn my phone off before I put it in your mailbox. Two nights ago, it was left on - battery drained. And I was so damn sure that I turned it off, you know, 'cause I always do. It's a habit, right? So, it was nagging me, it was *nagging* me! So, I called the phone company, turns out there was a deleted call at 2AM when I was asleep right there. And you know who's number? Hamlin's. The only person who could have made that call and deleted it is *you*, Chuck. Boy, that phone, huh? That phone must have felt like a blowtorch in your ear! All that electricity, all those radiowaves right up against the side of your head, my god! What was so important that you had to call Howard before our meeting? The only thing I can think of, the only thing that makes sense is you told him not to hire me. It was always you, right? Right back to when I passed the bar and tried to join the firm, *you* didn't want me. Speak up. Tell me why! It's the least you can do for me now! I'm your brother, we're supposed to look out for each other! Why were you working against me, Chuck?
Chuck: [in a feeble tone] You're not a real lawyer.
Saul: I'm *what*?
Chuck: [now raising his voice defiantly] You're not a real lawyer! "University of American Samoa", for Christ's sake? An online course? What a joke! I worked my ass off to get where I am! And you take these shortcuts and you think suddenly you're my peer? You do what I do because you're funny and you can make people laugh? I committed my *life* to this! You don't slide into it like a cheap pair of slippers and then reap all the rewards!
Saul: I thought you were proud of me.
Chuck: I was! When you straightened out and got a job in the mail room, I was *very* proud!
Saul: So that's it, then, right? Keep ol' Jimmy down in the mail room, 'cause he's not good enough to be a lawyer.
Chuck: I know you. I know what you were, what you are. People don't change! You're Slippin' Jimmy! And Slippin' Jimmy I can handle just fine, but Slippin' Jimmy with a law degree is like a chimp with a machine gun! The law is *sacred*! If you abuse that power, people get hurt! This is not a game! And you *have* to know that on some level, I know you know I'm right. You know I'm right!
Saul: [silent for a moment, and then breathes deeply] I... I got you a twenty-pound bag of ice and some bacon and some eggs and a couple of those steaks that you like, some fuel canisters, enough for three or four days. After that, you're on your own. I am done.
[gets up and leaves]
Chuck: Jimmy... Jimmy.
[gets up to go after him, Jimmy's already walking out to his car, Chuck stops at the doorway]
Chuck: Jimmy! Jimmy, come back inside! Jimmy! Jimmy!
[Jimmy takes off, tires screeching; guilt-ridden, Chuck watches him drive away and then silently closes the door]

Chuck: Requiring an individual to leave his house is seizure.
- And therefore protected under the fourth amendment.
- Right?
- Cop2: Whole lot of camp stove fuel.
- Guy sure sounds like a tweaker.
- See what he did to the breaker box?
- Is he coming out, or are we going in?

Chuck: So this is about my condition? Look! Look! You see?
[chuckling]
Chuck: See? I'm better!
[picks up a table lamp]
Chuck: Howard, I'm fine!
Howard: This is not what "fine" looks like.

Rick: Are you trying to make this a RICO case?
Reese: You think our client is John Gotti or something?
Jimmy: You know as well as I do that RICO's mostly used for business beefs. Sedima establishes a pretty low threshold for RICO provisions to kick in. Interstate commerce is a bitch, huh? As soon as we establish a pattern to, what was your word? Overbillings? I prefer the classic term of fraud. You're looking at treble damages, so, your hundred grand? I think you know where you can stick it.
Rick: Well... what number exactly did you have in mind?
Chuck: Twenty million.
Rick: Excuse me?
Chuck: You heard me.
Rick: Oh, you can't expect...
Chuck: Twenty million dollars. Or we'll see you in court.

Chuck: Jimmy.
- Just a sec.
- Oh, crap.
- What is it?
- I must have left my stupid phone on last night. It's dead.
- Well, could you put it in the trunk?
- Oh. Yeah.

[last lines]
Chuck: [casually walks out to the car to get a box from the trunk]
Jimmy: [runs outside] Chuck?
Chuck: Yeah?
[then slowly realizing where he is]

Chuck: I am not crazy! I know he swapped those numbers! I knew it was 1216. One after Magna Carta. As if I could ever make such a mistake. Never. Never! I just - I just couldn't prove it. He - he covered his tracks, he got that idiot at the copy shop to lie for him. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He's done worse. That billboard! Are you telling me that a man just happens to fall like that? No! He orchestrated it! Jimmy! He defecated through a sunroof! And I saved him! And I shouldn't have. I took him into my own firm! What was I thinking? He'll never change. He'll never change! Ever since he was 9, always the same! Couldn't keep his hands out of the cash drawer! But not our Jimmy! Couldn't be precious Jimmy! Stealing them blind! And he gets to be a lawyer? What a sick joke! I should've stopped him when I had the chance! And you - you have to stop him!

Chuck: [to Jimmy] Wouldn't you rather build your own identity? Why ride on someone else's coattails?

Chuck: [on the witness stand, losing his nerve, hollering] I AM NOT CRAZY!
[a pause as the courtroom is shocked silent]
Chuck: I am not crazy! I know he swapped those numbers. I knew it was 1216. One after Magna Carta. As if I could ever make such a mistake. Never. Never! I just - I just couldn't prove it. He covered his tracks, he got that idiot at the copy shop to lie for him. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? He's done worse. That billboard! Are you telling me that a man just happens to fall like that? No! *He* orchestrated it! Jimmy! He *defecated* through a *sunroof*! And I saved him! And I shouldn't have. I took him into my own firm! What was I *thinking*? He'll never change. He'll *never* change! Ever since he was 9, *always* the same! Couldn't keep his hands out of the cash drawer! "But not our Jimmy! Couldn't be precious *Jimmy*!" Stealing them blind! And *HE* gets to be a lawyer? What a sick joke! I should've stopped him when I had the chance!
[to the judges]
Chuck: And you, you *have* to stop him! You -
[suddenly freezes as he realizes what he's just done]

Jimmy: Son of a bitch.
Chuck: You ground yourself?
Jimmy: Yes, I grounded myself.

Chuck: Mm. Well, you could stay for a while. We could talk.
Jimmy: Talk? What about?
Chuck: Well, your cases. Your clients.
Jimmy: You want to talk about my clients?
[Chuckles]
Jimmy: Seriously? You want to talk about, uh, the granny who got picked up for soliciting inside the Christian Science Reading Room? Wh... What about the kid who broke into a liquor store and drank five bottles of crème de menthe and then passed out behind the counter?
Chuck: They deserve a vigorous defense. Like any other client.
Jimmy: Or maybe you just wanna tell me what I'm doing wrong.
Chuck: That's not what I had in mind.
[Bag rustling]
Chuck: I'm hoping you didn't steal that from a motel ice machine.
Jimmy: You can hope. I'm gonna take a pass on the heart-to-heart, Chuck. One of my deserving clients... He got caught waving the weenie outside a Hobby Lobby.
Chuck: Hold on. You got to reimburse yourself.
Jimmy: Mnh. This one's on me.
Chuck: Jimmy... If you don't like where you're heading, there's no shame in going back and changing your path.
Jimmy: Ohh. When have you ever changed your path?
[Chuckles]
Jimmy: Hey. Think on it.
Chuck: We always end up having the same conversation, don't we?
Jimmy: I'll see ya tomorrow, Chuck. And I might have the Financial Times.
[Door opens and closes]
Jimmy: [Lantern hissing]
[Hissing fades]

Chuck: My evidence is knowing my brother for his entire life.

Chuck: What a sick joke!

Chuck: My dad-our dad-he was... well, the personification of good. I'm not sure he could even see sin, in any form. Like he was born without the gene. He ran a little corner store in Cicero. Cigarettes behind the counter, penny candy. Nothing special, but it kept food on the table, and the neighborhood loved Dad. He knew everybody's name, what was going on in their lives. Just a little corner. He made it better. I was named after him. Before that, he worked for a lot of people over the years and his dream was to be his own boss. Put everything he had into that place. I was away at college when he put Jimmy to work there. Jimmy grew up in that store, watching our father... but Dad was not the world's greatest businessman, and eventually he ran into money troubles. I had a clerkship at the time, but I came home to help him get his books in order. Set the ship straight. Now, I'm no accountant, but I discovered $14,000 was just gone. Vanished over the years. Turns out Jimmy had pilfered it in dribs and drabs, just took it out of the till. My dad wouldn't hear it. Nope, not his Jimmy. He ended up having to sell. Six months later, he was dead. At the funeral, no one cried harder than Jimmy. My brother is not a bad person. He has a good heart. It's just he can't help himself... and everyone's left picking up the pieces.

Jimmy: What do I do now? I mean, what next?
Chuck: Well, you're gonna need more information. You don't want to go off half-cocked.
Jimmy: Full cock.

Kim: You made a mistake, and instead of just facing up to it, you accuse your brother of plotting against you. You come up with this elaborate scheme
Chuck: He's capable of this. You know he is.
Kim: I know he's not perfect. *pause* And I know he cuts corners. But you're the one who made him this way. He Idolizes you. He accepts you he takes care of you. And all he ever wanted was your love and support. But all you've ever done is judge him. You never believed in him. You never wanted him to succeed. *pause* And you know what? *pause* I feel sorry for him. *pause* And I feel sorry for you.

[first lines]
Veteran: [knocking on Chuck's front door] Albuquerque police. Hello? Sir, we'd like to talk with you for a minute. Could you open the door, please? Look, we know you're in there. You're casting a shadow through your peephole. All we want to do is talk. Would you please open the door?
Chuck: I'd, uh, I'd prefer not to, officers.
Younger: Sir, come on and open up.
Chuck: I have a condition. Uh, I can't go outside or be exposed to what's out there.
Veteran: You were able to come outside to steal your neighbor's newspaper.
Chuck: I didn't steal it. I left $5. The the cover price is 50 cents.
Veteran: Did your neighbor consent to sell you her paper?
Chuck: I, uh... She... isn't - Um, officer, let's Let's... Let's talk about something called "probable cause." As I'm sure you know, in the state of New Mexico there is a two-part test to determine whether police officers have an objectively reasonable basis...

Howard: Seventeen years. Eighteen in July, actually. All those years we built this place together. And all that time I've supported you. Looked up to you, deferred to you. Because I always thought you had the best interests of the firm in mind.
Chuck: I have!
Howard: You did. For a long time. But you've let personal vendettas turn your focus away from what's best for HHM. You've put your needs first. To our detriment.
Chuck: I don't think that's accurate.
Howard: And the moment that I mildly suggest, with empathy and concern, that maybe it's time for you to consider retirement... the first instinct you have is to sue me? To sue the firm? Well, I... I-I don't even know. I-In what world is that anything but the deepest betrayal of everything we worked so hard to accomplish? In what world is that anything but the deepest betrayal of our friendship?

Chuck: Money is beside the point.
Saul: Money is the point!

Chuck: Slippin' Jimmy with a law degree is like a chimp with a machine gun!

[last lines]
Jimmy: So that's it then, right? Keep old Jimmy down in the mail room. He's not good enough to be a lawyer.
Chuck: I know you. I know what you were, what you are. People don't change. You're Slippin' Jimmy. And Slippin' Jimmy I can handle just fine. Slippin' Jimmy with a law degree is like a chimp with a machine gun. The law is sacred. If you abuse that power, people get hurt. This is not a game. You have to know... On some level, I know you know I'm right. You know I'm right!
Jimmy: I, I got you a 20 pound bag of ice. And some bacon, and some eggs, and a couple of those steaks that you like. Some fuel canisters. It's enough for three or four days. After that, you're on your own. I am done...
Chuck: Jimmy. Jimmy. Jimmy Jimmy, come back inside. Jimmy! Jimmy.

Chuck: The situation as mincey v. Arizona pointed out...
- Create an event...