The Best Malcolm Quotes

- Laura, you came.
Malcolm: I'll be damned!
[Shelly] Laura!
- Guess what! We're doing it, Laura.
- We're finally doing the eternal flagellation!
- Yes!

- Made you something. Your paper clip.
- I know the perfect place to keep this.
Malcolm: I'll guard it with my life.
- I came here because something very big is set to occur.
Cliff: "The eternal flatulation is coming."
Laura: And it needs to be stopped.

Rita: Malcolm!
Malcolm: Laura!

- of cultural trends could prove a fertile canvas in which to examine human frivolity.
Malcolm: Mmm-hmm.
- We're the sisterhood of dada.
[In English] We're artists.
- Well, that's a little harsh.

Malcolm: Introducing skittish apparition, and the shapeless shape.
Rita: Plastic!
Malcolm: Tundra!
[Both] Gullible pickling carousel!
Malcolm: Ah...

- Your...
- Your country needs you.
- So... on your knees, bendy.
- On your knees, bendy.
- On your knees!
Malcolm: Laura, stop this.