The Best Sark Quotes

Master: You're getting brutal, Sark. Brutal and needlessly sadistic.
Sark: Thank you, Master Control.

Sark: [torturing Dumont] Had enough?
Dumont: What do you want? I'm busy!
Sark: Busy dying, you worn-out excuse for an old program.
Dumont: Yes, I'm old. Old enough to remember the MCP when he was just a chess program! He started small, and he'll end small!
Sark: Very funny, Dumont! Maybe I should keep you around, just make me laugh!

Sark: There's nothing special about you. You're just an ordinary program.
Kevin: So are you, one that should have been erased.

Sark: [Paces back and forth on the deck of his carrier as he addresses his new recruits] Greetings. The Master Control Program has chosen you to serve your system on the Game Grid. Those of you who continue to profess a belief in the Users will receive the standard substandard training which will result in your eventual elimination. Those of you who renounce this superstitious and hysterical belief will be eligible to join the warrior elite of the MCP. You will each receive an identity disc.
[Displays his own disc to the crowd]
Sark: Everything you do or learn will be imprinted on this disc. If you lose your disc, or fail to follow commands, you will be subject to immediate de-resolution. That will be all.

Blue: This is Blue Leader to Blue Bikes. Run these guys into your jet walls.
Blue: Copy Blue Leader.
Blue: Copy Blue Leader.
Tron: This is Gold-1 to Gold-2 and 3. Split up. Take them one-on-one.
Blue: Watch it! Watch it!
Blue: [Tron corners him between a light wall and his own trail] Aah!
Blue: Taking him into the maze.
Kevin: This is it. Come on. Gold-3 to Gold-2 and 1. I'm getting out of here right now, and you guys are invited.
Ram: Got it.
Tron: Ready?
Ram: Ready!
Tron: So long, suckers!
Kevin: Greetings, programs!
Announcer: Video game warriors escaping game grid. This is an illegal exit. You must return to game grid. Repeat! This is an illegal exit. You must return to the grid.
Ram: Gold-3 to Gold-2. Those demons are coming down.
Sark: Get them! Send out every game tank in the grid!
[knocks his lieutenant down]
Sark: Get them!

Master: I've got a little challenge for you, Sark - a new recruit. He's a tough case, but I want him treated in the usual manner. Train him for the games... let him hope for a while... and blow him away.
Sark: You've got it. I've been hopin' you'd send me somebody with a little bit of guts. What kind of program is he?
Master: He's not any kind of program, Sark. He's a User.
Sark: [shocked] A User?
Master: That's right. He pushed me in the real world. Somebody pushes me, I push back, so I brought him down here.
[pause]
Master: What's the matter, Sark? You look nervous.
Sark: Well, I - it's just - I don't know, a User, I mean... Users wrote us. A User even wrote you!
Master: No one User wrote me! I'm worth millions of their man-years!
Sark: What if I can't...
Master: You rather take your chances with me? Want me to slow down your power cycles for you?
Sark: [struggling] Wait! I need that!
Master: Then pull yourself together. Get this clown trained. I want him in the Games until he dies playing. Acknowledge.
Sark: [weakly] Acknowledged, Master Control.
Master: End of line!

Sark: [to Tron] I don't know how you survived, slave. It doesn't matter. Prepare to terminate.
[throws his disc repeatedly at Tron, who blocks every throw]
Sark: You should've joined me; we'd have made a great team!
[Tron is being visibly worn down by repeated blocking with his own disc]
Sark: You're very persistent, Tron!
Tron: I'm also better than you...
[throws his own disc at Sark; it shears through Sark's blocking disc AND the Game-Master's helmet. As Tron's disc returns to him, he catches it]
Tron: ... Consider that a present from Ram.