The Best Captain Jack Wander Quotes

Captain: Where's the video? Who else has seen this shit?
Sgt. Mike Clady: Just us, boss.
Tom: It was a straight 211 that went sideways.
Sgt. Mike Clady: It's not what it was, Lud. It's what it looks like...
Tom: It's not what it looks like. It's not.
Captain: That's all there is, Tom! What is looks like! What everybody sees! You know that!
Sgt. Mike Clady: Lud, anybody in the department sees this video, you're no longer a cop. You understand that?
Captain: The department? The D.A. sees this... He's... He's going to prison.
Tom: Why? Because Washington was in the wrong place at the wrong time?
Captain: No, because you were. Washington's problems are over, yours are just beginning.

Tom: What's with you? Clady give you a happy ending?
Captain: Is that anyway to address a commander? Got the call from the chief this morning. Badge ceremony's next week.
Tom: Congratulations, boss.
Sgt. Mike Clady: Hey, we're gonna have the keys to the city.
Detective: Believe that shit? They're crowning him king.
Captain: [raising glass] Let's give a toast to that. Toast to the king!

Tom: You killed Washington!
Captain: Fuck him! Fuck Santos! Fuck Demille! Fuck Clady! Fuck them all! Fuck them all! They're a dime a dozen. You... you, man. You're special. You're special to me.
Tom: [shows him Diskant's badge] And Diskant? Was he special? I watched a good man die because of you.
Captain: That is entirely your fault.

Captain: You like Tom, don't you? I saw the way you watched him when he came in. That's why you follow him around. You want him to give you a blowjob, like that hooker that I caught you with when we were sergeants, remember?
Captain: Shut up, Jack!
Captain: Does your wife know that you use prostitutes, Jimmy?
Captain: It was the best head I ever had. And what about you, Jack? You always found it hard to keep your prick out of the ghetto. It's a two-way street, buddy. You can't ride the tiger forever. Now get the hell out of my office.
Captain: Do the department a favor and wash your mouth out with buckshot.

Captain: [to Ludlow] I can't afford to lose you. Who'd do what you do? You are the tip of the fucking spear. Who's going to hold back the animals?

Captain: [after Ludlow tears down his wall] This is my power. This is my crown. I'm the king of secrets, Tom. I know which city councilmen is doing lines. I know who likes boys, I know who's selling contracts, I know who beat his wife. I own them, even the chief. He's in my pocket, Tom. How do you think I've been able to protect you all these years? What do you think is it you're doing? All these missions. How do you think you're able to touch the untouchables? I'm going to be chief. I will be chief! I will be mayor! This is our world, Tom! So let's take it!
Tom: Is that why you put a hit on Washington? Why you tried to kill me? So you can keep stuffing money in your wall?
Captain: But this is our money. The unit's. Who do you think paid for Silky's defense, through all those law suits? Who's going to pay for your retirement? I'm just correcting a flaw in the system, Tom. This is about cops helping cops. And if a teacher, or a fireman, could do it, they would do it too.
Tom: What happened to just locking up bad people?
Captain: We're all bad, Tom.
Tom: You were my best friend.
Captain: You were family.

Captain: I'm sick of this shit, man. It's the same damn song for three years. Crying about your wife. She's gone, Tom. What's it going to take to bring you back from Mars?
Tom: Have I ever asked you for anything?
Captain: You know what, you ask me for shit all the time.
Tom: Big things, Jack. Important things.
Captain: What's up, Tom?
Tom: Give me a green light to take out the assholes who did Washington. Come on, Jack. King's X.
Captain: What the hell is this?
Tom: I can lay them out like I did those Koreans, but off the books. I'm talking shovels and trash bags. Who's going to know? Who's going to care?
Captain: The Koreans? That was business. This is some crazy bullshit wrapped around in that drunk ass mind of yours. Look at yourself. Look at yourself Tom, you're a mess! When did you start drinking today? You're little airplane bottles of vodka. And you drove over here intoxicated. You want a second DIU?
Tom: [yelling] No one's going to fuck with me Jack! You're not listening to me! You're not listening to me!

Tom: [getting up to confront Washington] I'm just going to talk to him.
Sgt. Mike Clady: [holding Ludlow back] No, you're not. You're not.
Captain: You wanna talk? Let's talk about my foot up your ass if you don't sit the fuck down in your goddamn chair right now!

Captain: This shit's crazy! You fucked them up! This is beautiful. And that machine gun shit - that was perfect. I know you hated waiting, but it's better this way. You alright?
Tom: Yeah I uh... I got shot.
Captain: Yeah, but you're okay?
Tom: Yeah, I'm okay Jack.
Captain: Because I know you're not tripping over these assholes right here. Fuck 'em. Screw 'em. You went toe-to-toe with evil, and you won.