30 Best Donnie Darko Quotes

Donnie: What happened to your eye?
Frank: I'm so sorry.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: Do you still think about girls a lot?
Donnie: [Under hypnosis] Yeah.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: How are things going at school?
Donnie: I think about girls a lot.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: I asked you about school, Donnie.
Donnie: I think about fucking a lot during school.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: What else do you think about during school?
Donnie: Married with Children.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: Do you think about your family?
Donnie: I just turn down the volume and think about fucking Christina Applegate.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: I asked you about your family, Donnie.
Donnie: [Chuckling] No. I don't think about fucking my family. That's gross.

Donnie: [to Jim Cunningham] I think you're the fucking anti-Christ.

[to Cherita Chen]
Donnie: I promise that one day, everything's gonna be better for you.
Cherita: [with accent] Shut up!

Donnie: Why are you wearing that stupid bunny suit?
Frank: Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?

Donnie: How can you do that?
Frank: I can do anything I want. And so can you.

Elizabeth: You can go suck a fuck.
Donnie: Oh, please, tell me, Elizabeth, how exactly does one suck a fuck?

Sean: [at the bus stop] That's some good shit, huh?
Donnie: It's a fucking cigarette.

Donnie: I was in jail once. I mean I accidentally burned down this house. It was abandoned, but still, I got held back in school and I can't drive until I'm 21. But I'm over all of that. I... I... I'm painting and stuff. Writing. I want to be a writer, or maybe a painter, I don't know, or maybe both. I'll write a book and draw the pictures. Then maybe people will understand me. I don't know, change things.

Donnie: [Talking about portals through space-time] Well, could these portals, um... Could these portals just appear anywhere, anytime?
Prof. Kenneth Monnitoff: I think that's highly unlikely. No, I think what you're talking about is an act of God.
Donnie: Well, if God controls time, then all time is pre-decided.
Prof. Kenneth Monnitoff: I'm not following you.
Donnie: Every living thing follows along a set path. And if you could see your path or channel, then you could see into the future, right? Like, uh... It's a form of time travel.
Prof. Kenneth Monnitoff: Well, you're-you're contradicting yourself there, Donnie. If we were able to see our destinies manifest themselves visually, then we would be given a choice to betray our chosen destinies. And the mere fact that this choice exists would make all preformed destiny, uh, come to an end.
Donnie: Not if you travel within God's channel.
Prof. Kenneth Monnitoff: Um, I'm not going to be able to continue this conversation.
Donnie: Why?
Prof. Kenneth Monnitoff: I could lose my job.
Donnie: Okay.

[from the Extended and Deleted Scenes. The class is discussing "Watership Down"]
Karen: When the other rabbits hear of Fiver's vision, do they believe him?
Donnie: Why should we care?
Karen: Because the rabbits are us, Donnie.
Donnie: Why should I mourn for a rabbit like it was human?
Karen: Are you saying that the death of one species is less tragic than another?
Donnie: Of course. The rabbit's not like us. It has no history books, no photographs, no knowledge of sorrow or regret. I mean, I'm sorry, Miss Pommeroy. Don't get me wrong. You know, I like rabbits and all. They're cute and they're horny. And if you're cute and you're horny, then you're probably happy that you don't know who you are or why you're even alive. You just wanna have sex as many times as possible before you die. I just don't see the point in crying over a dead rabbit, you know, who never even feared death to begin with.

[Donnie tries to kiss Gretchen and she pulls away]
Donnie: I - I'm sorry. I...
Gretchen: Look, Donnie, wait.
Donnie: I like you a lot.
Gretchen: I just want it to be at a time when it...
Donnie: When what?
Gretchen: When it reminds me just...
Donnie: When it reminds you how beautiful the world can be?
Gretchen: Yeah.
[turns her head]
Gretchen: And right now there's some fat guy over there staring at us.

Donnie: [in a letter] Dear Roberta Sparrow, I have reached the end of your book and there are so many things that I need to ask you. Sometimes I'm afraid of what you might tell me. Sometimes I'm afraid that you'll tell me that this is not a work of fiction. I can only hope that the answers will come to me in my sleep. I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to.

Donnie: [to his mother] How's it feel to have a wacko for a son?
Rose: It feels wonderful.

Gretchen: "Donnie Darko." What the hell kind of name is that? It's like some sort of superhero or something.
Donnie: What makes you think I'm not?

Ronald: Beer and pussy. That's all I need.
Sean: We gotta find ourselves a Smurfette.
Ronald: Smurfette?
Sean: Mm-hmm. Not some, like, tight-ass Middlesex chick, you know? Like, this cute little blonde that will get down and dirty with the guys. Like Smurfette does.
Donnie: Smurfette doesn't fuck.
Sean: That's bullshit. Smurfette fucks all the other Smurfs. Why do you think Papa Smurf made her? Because all the other Smurfs were getting too horny.
Ronald: No, no, no, not Vanity. I heard he was a homosexual.
Sean: Okay, well, you know what? Then she fucks them while Vanity watches. Okay?
Ronald: What about Papa Smurf? I mean, he must get in on all the action.
Sean: Yeah, what he does, he films the gang-bang. Later on, he beats off to the tape.
Donnie: [matter-of-factly] First of all, Papa Smurf didn't create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel's evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village. But the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gang-bang scenario - It just couldn't happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants. That's what's so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. What's the point of living... if you don't have a dick?
Ronald: [pause] Damn it, Donnie. Why do you gotta get so smart on us?

Donnie: Frank. When's this gonna stop?
Frank: You should already know that.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: Do you feel alone right now?
Donnie: Oh, I don't know. I mean, I'd like to believe I'm not, but I just... I've just never seen any proof, so I... I just don't debate it anymore, you know? It's like I could spend my whole life debating it over and over again, weighing the pros and cons. And in the end, I still wouldn't have any proof. So I just... I just don't debate it anymore. It's absurd.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: The search for God is absurd?
Donnie: It is if everyone dies alone.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: Does that scare you?
Donnie: I don't want to be alone.

Donnie: I made a new friend.
Dr. Lilian Thurman: Real or imaginary?
Donnie: Imaginary.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: Donnie, what did Roberta Sparrow say to you?
Donnie: She said that every living creature on Earth dies alone.

Donnie: Well, life isn't that simple. I mean, who cares if Ling Ling returns the wallet and keeps the money? It has nothing to do with either fear or love.
Kitty: Fear and love are the deepest of human emotions.
Donnie: Okay. But you're not listening to me. There are other things that need to be taken into account here, like the whole spectrum of human emotion. You can't just lump everything into these two categories and then just deny everything else.

Donnie: [to Pommeroy, about the Graham Greene story] Well, they say it right when they flood the house, and they tear it to shreds that, like, uh, destruction is a form of creation. So the fact that they burn the money is ironic. They just want to see what happens when they tear the world apart. They want to change things.

Gretchen: My mom had to get a restraining order against my stepdad. He has emotional problems.
Donnie: Oh, I have those, too. What kind of emotional problems does your dad have?
Gretchen: He stabbed my mom four times in the chest.
Donnie: Oh.

Jim: Son... Do you see this?
Donnie: Right?
Jim: This is an anger prisoner. A textbook example.
Donnie: Anger prisoner.
Jim: Do you see the fear, people? This boy is scared to death of the truth. Son, it breaks my heart to say this, but I believe you are a very troubled and confused young man. I believe you are searching for the answers in all the wrong places.
Donnie: You're right, actually. I am pretty... I'm pretty troubled and I'm pretty confused, but I... And I'm afraid. Really, really afraid. Really afraid. But I-I think you're the fucking Antichrist.

Donnie: [reading poem in class] "'A storm is coming,' Frank says. 'A storm that will swallow the children. And I will deliver them from the kingdom of Bane. I'll deliver the children back to their doorsteps. I'll send the monsters back to the underground. I'll send them back to a place where no one else can see them except for me, 'cause I am Donnie Darko.'"

Gretchen: You're weird.
Donnie: Sorry.
Gretchen: No, that was a compliment.

Donnie: You're such a fuck-ass!
Rose: Please.
Elizabeth: What? Did you just call me a "fuck-ass"?
Rose: Elizabeth, that's enough.
Elizabeth: You can go suck a fuck.
Donnie: Oh, please, tell me, Elizabeth, how exactly does one suck a fuck?
Elizabeth: You want me to tell you?
Donnie: Please, tell me.
Rose: We will not have this at the dinner table.
Donnie: [Mouthing] I'm all ears!

Donnie: Where did you come from?
Frank: Do you believe in time travel?

Frank: 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, 12 seconds. That is when the world will end.
Donnie: Why?

Donnie: I hope that when the world comes to an end, I can breathe a sigh of relief, because there will be so much to look forward to.