Top 20 Quotes From Dr. John Watson

Dr. John Watson: How did you know I would find you?
Sherlock: You didn't find me. You collapsed a building on me.

Sherlock: Uh, hmm... Right. Where are the wagons?
Madam: The wagon is too slow. Can't you ride?
Dr. John Watson: It's not that he can't ride... How is it you put it, Holmes?
Sherlock: They're dangerous at both ends and... crafty in the middle. Why would I want anything with a mind of its own bobbing about between my legs?

Sherlock: Madam, this is a glorious hedgehog goulash. I can't remember ever having had better.
Dr. John Watson: Do tell me, when was the last time you had a hedgehog goulash?
Sherlock: I told you, Watson, I can't remember.
Dr. John Watson: [whispered] Perhaps you've repressed it.
Sherlock: [chuckles] That's where we differ. Unlike you, I repress nothing.
Dr. John Watson: Perfectly normal.
Sherlock: How dare you be rude to this women who has invited us into her tent, offered us her hedgehog?
Dr. John Watson: Says the man who throws women from trains.

Dr. John Watson: Oh, how I've missed you, Holmes.
Sherlock: Have you? Why? I've barely noticed your absence.

Sherlock: [after they finish a short waltz] Who taught you to dance like that?
Dr. John Watson: [with a smile of reminiscence] You did.

Dr. John Watson: He's after us, because of you!
Sherlock: Don't be so petulant about it.

Dr. John Watson: I'm on my honeymoon!
[Watson kicks Holmes on the bum]
Dr. John Watson: Why did you lead them here! Why did you involve us?
Sherlock: They're not here for me they are here for you! Fortunately... so am I.

Dr. John Watson: [reading a note from Holmes] Come at once if convenient.
[flips the note over to back side]
Dr. John Watson: If inconvenient, come all the same.

[from trailer]
Sherlock: [looks at Watson's gun] Get that out of my face.
Dr. John Watson: It's not in your face; it's in my hand.
Sherlock: Get what's in your hand out of my face!

[after Holmes throws Mary off the train, Watson turns around and sees his wife gone]
Sherlock: It had to be done. She's safe now! In my own defense, I timed it perfectly-!
[Watson lunges at him and starts throttling him]
Dr. John Watson: Did you kill my wife?
Sherlock: [muffled, tries to respond]
Dr. John Watson: DID-YOU-JUST-KILL-MY-NEW-WIFE?
Sherlock: [forces Watson's hand away] Of course not!
Dr. John Watson: What do you mean? How do you know that, when you just threw her off a train?
Sherlock: I told you, I timed it perfectly!
Dr. John Watson: What does that mean?
Sherlock: Calm down!
Dr. John Watson: Explain!
Sherlock: By the time I explained, we'd both be dead!

Mrs. Hudson: Doctor, you must get him to a sanatorium. He's been on a diet of coffee, tobacco, and coca leaves. He never sleeps. I hear multiple voices as if he's rehearsing for a play...
Dr. John Watson: Leave him to me.
Sherlock: [appears next to her] Don't you have a goat that needs worming?
[goat lows]
Mrs. Hudson: Oh, how kind of you to remind me. So much to look forward to. What would I do without you?

Sherlock: Did you call me a selfish bastard?
Dr. John Watson: Probably.

[when Holmes has sedated Gladstone yet again]
Dr. John Watson: How many times are you going to kill my dog?

[last lines]
Dr. John Watson: [upon receiving the oxygen mask as an indication that Holmes may be alive] Mary? Who delivered this parcel?
Mary: [offscreen] The postman.
Dr. John Watson: [as he leaves the room] The usual chap or... did he look peculiar?

[first lines]
Dr. John Watson: [voice-over] The year was 1891. Storm clouds were brewing over Europe. France and Germany were at each other's throats, the result of a series of bombings. Some said it was the Nationalists. Others, the anarchists. But as usual, my friend Sherlock Holmes, had a different theory entirely.

Mary: I miss him too, in my own way.
Dr. John Watson: He would have wanted us to go to Brighton.
Mary: He would have wanted to come with us.

[from trailer]
Dr. John Watson: [seeing Holmes's drag outfit] What?
Sherlock: I agree it's not my best disguise.

Dr. John Watson: [performing CPR] I know you can hear me, you selfish bastard!

Dr. John Watson: [as he watches Sherlock drinking embalming fluid] You're drinking embalming fluid?
Sherlock: [exhales] Yes. Care for a drop?
Dr. John Watson: You do seem...
Sherlock: Excited?
Dr. John Watson: Manic.
Sherlock: I am.
Dr. John Watson: Verging on...
Sherlock: Ecstatic?
Dr. John Watson: Psychotic.
Dr. John Watson: [pause] I should've brought you a sedative.

Sherlock: [lights pipe]
Dr. John Watson: What are we doing down here?
Sherlock: *We* are waiting. *I* am smoking.