Top 100 Quotes From Dustin Henderson

Dustin: He's gonna spread his nasty-ass rash to your whole family.

Suzie: I haven't heard from you in a week, and now you want a mathematical equation that you should know so you can save the world?
Dustin: Suzie-poo, I promise, I will make it up to you as soon as possible.
Suzie: You can make it up to me now.
Dustin: What?
Suzie: I want to hear it.
Dustin: Not right now.
Suzie: Yes, now, Dusty-bun.
Dustin: Suzie-poo, this is urgent.
Suzie: Yes, yes, you're saving the world, I heard you the first time, but Ged is also saving Earthsea and he's about to confront the shadow, so this is Suzie, signing off.
Dustin: Wait, wait, wait! Okay. Okay. Shit.
[He starts nervously singing The Neverending Story by Limahl]
Dustin: Turn around Look at what you see...

- Hey, there you go.
Dustin: Ow.
- You said three.
[whispers] Sorry.
- Bedtime at nine, kiddos.
- Miss you already!

Steve: It's like before it's gonna storm, you know? You can't see it, but you can feel it, like this, uh... Electricity, you know?
Dustin: Oh, you mean like in the electromagnetic field when the clouds in the atmosphere...
Steve: No, no, no, no, no. Like a... Like a sexual electricity.
Dustin: Oh.
Steve: You feel that, and then you make your move
Dustin: So that's when you kiss her?
Steve: No, whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down, Romeo. Sure, okay, some girls, yeah, they want you to be aggressive. You know, strong, hot and heavy, like a... I don't know, like a lion. But others, you gotta be slow, you gotta be stealthy, like a... Like a ninja.
Dustin: What type is Nancy?
Steve: Nancy's different. She's different than the other girls.
Dustin: Yeah, she seems pretty special, I guess.
Steve: Yeah. Yeah, she is.
Dustin: But this girls special too, you know. It's just, like, something about her.
Steve: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey, hey.
Dustin: What?
Steve: You're not falling in love with this girl, are you?
Dustin: No. No.
Steve: Okay, good. Don't.
Dustin: I won't.
Steve: She's only gonna break your heart, and you're way too young for that shit.

Eddie: Never change, Dustin Henderson. Promise me?
Dustin: I wasn't planning on it.
Eddie: Good. Good. Good.

[last lines]
Dustin: Holy sh-
[credits roll]

[trying to place a dead demodog in the freezer]
Steve: Is this really necessary?
Dustin: Yes it is! Okay? This is a groundbreaking scientific discovery, we can't just bury it like some common mammal, okay? It's not a dog!
Steve: All right, all right, all right. But you're explaining this to Mrs. Byers.

- Toothless.
- Shit! Run, Mike!
- What?
- Run! Come on!
Troy: You're dead, Wheeler.
Dustin: Move, Mike!
- Mike, come on, run!

Steve: [as they watch Max] Okay. She's in.
Dustin: I'm missing collarbones, not eyes.

- Oh, shit.
Steve: Here.
- Dustin! Come on!
Dustin: No!
Dustin: This is...
- Eleven.

Dustin: [to Mike] There's something wrong with your sister.
Mike: What are you talking about?
Dustin: She's got a stick up her butt.
Lucas: Yeah, it's because she's been dating that douchebag Steve Harrington.
Dustin: Yeah she's turning into a real jerk.
Mike: She's always been a real jerk!
Dustin: Nuh-uh, she used to be cool. Like that time she dressed up as an elf for our Elder Tree campaign.
Mike: Four years ago!
Dustin: [riding off on his bicycle] Just saying.
Lucas: [following Dustin] Later.
Will: [to Mike] It was a seven.
Mike: [confused] Huh?
Will: The roll- it was a seven. The Demogorgon... it got me.
[Mike looks at him as he pushes off on his bicycle]
Will: See you tomorrow.

Lucas: [while following the compasses along the train tracks] How much further?
Dustin: I don't know. These only tell direction, not distance. You really need to learn more about compasses!
Lucas: I'm just saying: how do we know when we get to the gate?
Dustin: Uh, I think a portal to another dimension is gonna be pretty obvious!

Jim: [all boys trying to speak at once] Okay, okay, okay, one at a time, all right?
[points to Mike]
Jim: You. You said he takes what?
Mike: Mirkwood.
Jim: Mirkwood?
Mike: Yeah.
Jim: Have you ever heard of Mirkwood?
Officer: I have not. It sounds made up to me.
Lucas: It's from Lord of the Rings.
Dustin: Actually, The Hobbit.
Lucas: Who cares?
Dustin: He asked.
Lucas: [mocking] He asked!
Mike: Shut up, guys!
Jim: Hey, hey! What did I just say? Shut up. One at a damn time.
[to Mike]
Jim: You.
Mike: Mirkwood. It's a real road, it's just the name that's made up. It's where Cornwallis and Kerley meet.
Jim: Yeah I think I know that.
Mike: We can show you if you want.
Jim: I said that I know it.
Mike: We can help look.
Dustin: Yeah.
Jim: No.
[boys protest]
Jim: No. After school, you all go home. Immediately. That means no biking around looking for your friend, no investigating, no nonsense. This isn't some Lord of the Rings book.
Dustin: The Hobbit.
Lucas: Shut up!
[boys try to punch each other with Mike stuck between them]
Mike: Stop!
Jim: Do I make myself clear?
[stands over the boys]
Jim: Do I make myself... clear?
Mike: Yes sir.

Jim: It's not like it was before, it's grown. A lot. I mean, that's considering we can get in there, the place is crawling with those dogs...
Dustin: Demodogs.
Jim: I'm sorry, what?
Dustin: I said, uh, Demodogs. Like Demogorgon and dogs, like, you put them together, it sounds pretty badass...
Jim: How is this important right now?
Dustin: It's not, I'm sorry.

Steve: I swear to god, man, it's just some little lizard, okay?
Dustin: It's not a lizard.
Steve: How do you know?
Dustin: How do I know if its not just a lizard?
Steve: Yeah, how do you know it's not just a lizard?
Dustin: Because his face opened up and he ate my cat.

Dustin: You guys think he's okay?
Lucas: He's always weird when he has to go in.
- I don't know. He's quiet today.
- He's always quiet.

- Let me see that.
Dustin: He must be further down there.
- I'll stay up here in case he tries to escape.

- Have a picnic?
- We came here for the radio.
Dustin: This plan is way better.
- If I knew Steve could knock out a Russian, that would've been our plan in the first place.
- -...but I guess you're--
- -Guys.
- There's something up there.
Steve: Let's go.

Dustin: I think we should tell your mom.
Lucas: I second that.
Mike: Who's crazy now?
Lucas: How is that crazy?
Mike: 'Cause we weren't supposed to be out tonight, remember?
Lucas: So?
Mike: So if I tell my mom and she tells your mom and *your* mom...
Lucas: Our houses become Alcatraz.
Mike: Exactly. We'll never find Will. All right here's the plan. She sleeps here tonight.
Dustin: You're letting a girl...
Mike: Just listen! In the morning ,she sneaks around my house, goes to the front door and rings the doorbell. My mom will answer and know exactly what to do. They'll send her back to Pennhurst or wherever she comes from. We'll be totally in the clear! And tomorrow night, we go back out. And this time, we find Will.

Dustin: Shit!
Mike: Go, go, go, go.
[Panting] Lando.
- You think they saw us?
- Both of you, shut up.

- Or toothless here gets an early trip to the dentist.
Dustin: Stop! No!
- I'll cut him right now!
- All right, just hold on!
- Hold on!
- Mike, don't do it.
- I don't need my baby teeth, Mike!
- Mike, seriously, don't!

Robin: I mean, it's just a clock. Right? Like a normal old clock.
Steve: Why is this wizard obsessed with clocks? Maybe he's, like, a clockmaker or something?
Dustin: I think you cracked the case, Steve.

Mike: [as Mrs. Wheeler is talking on the phone] Mom! *Mom*!
Karen: [Into the phone] I'm sorry, can you just hold on please?
[to Mike]
Karen: Michael, I'm on the phone. I've told you a million times...
Mike: Did you schedule any repairs?
Karen: What?
Mike: Is there anyone supposed to come and do repairs on the house?
Karen: I don't understand, is there something wrong in the house-?
Mike: No Mom, nothing's wrong with the house...
Dustin: Mike!
Mike: One second...
Dustin: *Mike!*
[panting]
Dustin: We need to leave. Right. Now.
Karen: Michael!
Mike: If anyone asks where I am, I've left the country!
[runs off after Dustin]

Mike: [about his knuckle-cracking] I think it's kinda cool. It's like you have superpowers or something. Like Mr. Fantastic.
Dustin: Yeah, except I can't fight evil with it.

Steve: [as Dustin produces a flashlight] Where'd everyone get those?
Dustin: Do you need to be told everything? You're not a child.
Steve: Thank you.

Lucas: [sighs] If I get another 3 Musketeers, I'm gonna kill myself.
Dustin: What's wrong with 3 Musketeers?
Lucas: What's wrong with 3 Musketeers? No one likes 3 Musketeers.
Mike: Yeah, it's just nougat.
Dustin: Whoa. Just nougat? Just nougat? It is top three for me.
Mike: Top three?

Dustin: Oh-ho-ho!
- Do you even know how to drive?
- How hard can it be? Max did it.
- -[Dustin] Aw, come on.
- -You seriously thought
- -they'd just leave keys in there?
- -There's gotta be a spare.

- -We're almost out!
- -I know!
- Dustin! We're out of time!
- Hurry! Close it now!
Dustin: Close it!

Dustin: Stop! You guys, please, shut up.
- Whoa, dude. That's the donation box.
- I know.
- I'll just use yours when I come back.
- I mean, if we still wanna play.
- Yeah, but what if you want to join another party?
- Not possible.

- Guys...
- I found him.
Dustin: Where?
- In the bathroom by Mr. Salerno's.
Mike: Copy that.
- It's okay.
- I'm not gonna hurt you.

[repeated line]
Dustin: Lando!

Chief: And what exactly were you all doing at the lake?
Dustin: Uh... it's compl...
Max: We were... We were just going for a walk.
Officer: A walk? At 9:00 p.m.?
Dustin: To the lake. We were gonna... take a little swim. Little night swim.

Dustin: Look, I'm not saying that my girlfriend is better than yours. It's just that Suzie's, like, a certified genius.
Mike: You do realize El saved the world twice, right?
Dustin: And yet you still have a C in Spanish.

Mike: [watching Will's body pulled from the water] It's not Will. It can't be.
Lucas: It's Will. It's really Will.
Eleven: [Placing her hand on Mike's shoulder] Mike...
Mike: [slapping El's hand away] Mike? Mike what? You were supposed to help us find him alive. You said he was alive. Why did you lie to us? What's wrong with you? What is *wrong* with you?
Eleven: [whispering] Mike...
Mike: What?
Lucas: Mike, come on, don't do this, man. Mike!
Dustin: Mike, where are you going? Mike? Mike!

Jonathan: [Jonathan enters the waiting room and nods to Mike] Yeah.
Mike: [Waking Dustin and Lucas] Guys, guys, he's up. Will's up, guys! Guys come on!
Mike: [Bursting into the hospital room] Byers!
Joyce: [Mike and Lucas pile on Will] Be careful. Be careful with him!
Dustin: Move!
[Yanks Mike and Lucas off Will to hug him]
Jonathan: Guys, guys, go easy on him.
Lucas: You won't believe what happened when you were gone, man.
Dustin: It was mental!
Lucas: You had a funeral...
Dustin: Jenniffer Hayes was crying...
Lucas: And Troy peed himself!
Will: What?
Dustin: In front of the whole school!
Mike: [Will coughs uncontrollably] You okay?
Will: It got me. The Demogorgon.
Mike: We know. It's okay. It's dead. We made a new friend. She stopped it. She saved us. But she's gone now.
Dustin: Her name's Eleven.
Will: Like the number?
Lucas: Well, we call her 'El' for short.
Dustin: She's basically a wizard.
Lucas: [whispering] She has superpowers.
Mike: More like a yoda.
Dustin: She flipped a van with her mind!
Mike: And it sailed over us!
[excited chatter continues]

Dustin: We never would've upset you if we knew you had superpowers.

Dustin: [to Steve as he recovers] It's okay, you put up a good fight. He kicked your ass, but you put up a good fight.

Mike: [El collapses] El! El, are you okay? El! Something's wrong!
Dustin: She's just drained.
Mike: No, she won't wake up!
[shaking her]
Mike: El. El! El!
Mike: [listening to her heartbeat] She's barely breathing.
Lucas: We gotta go!
Dr. Martin Brenner: Leave her!
[the boys stand protectively over El]
Dr. Martin Brenner: Step away from the child.
Mike: No! You want her, you have to kill us first!
Dustin: That's right!
Lucas: Eat shit!
Lucas: [Agents sneak behind the kids, capturing them] No, no! No! You idiot!
Dustin: Get off me!
Mike: Ow! Let go!
Dr. Martin Brenner: [rousing El] Eleven... Eleven, can you hear me?
Eleven: [groggy] Papa?
Dr. Martin Brenner: Yes, yes it's your Papa.
Mike: Get off of me!
Dr. Martin Brenner: I'm here now.
Mike: Let her go! Let her go you bastard!
Dr. Martin Brenner: [El whimpers] Shh, shhh. You're sick. You're sick but I'm going to make you better. I'm going to take you back home where I can make you well again. Where we can make all of this better. Where no one else gets hurt.
Eleven: Bad... bad...
[trying to pull away and reach for Mike]
Eleven: Mike... Mike! Mike!

- You tell anyone I just told you that and your ass is grass.
- You're dead, Henderson. Do you understand?
- Yup.
- Okay.
- Farrah fawcett, really?
- I mean, she's hot.
Dustin: Yeah.

[a frightened Eddie pins Steve to the wall with a broken bottle to his throat]
Dustin: Eddie! Eddie! It's me. It's Dustin. This is Steve. He's not gonna hurt you, right, Steve?
Steve: Right. Yeah.
Dustin: Steve, why don't you drop the oar?
[Steve does so, but Eddie holds the broken bottle closer to Steve's throat]
Dustin: He's cool. He's cool.
Steve: [choked] I'm cool, man. I'm cool.
Eddie: What are you doing here?
Dustin: We're looking for you.
Robin: We're here to help.
Dustin: Eddie, these are my friends. You know Robin, from band.
[She imitates playing the trumpet]
Dustin: This is my friend Max. The one who never wants to play D&D.
[Max gives Eddie a half-hearted wave]
Dustin: Eddie, we're on your side. I swear on my mother. Right, guys?
Max: Yes. Yes, we swear.
Robin: On Dustin's mother.
Steve: Yeah, Dustin's... Dustin's mother.
[after a tense pause, Eddie finally releases Steve]

Mike: What was Will saying? "Like home... like home... but dark"?
Lucas: And empty.
Dustin: Empty and cold... wait, did he say cold?
Lucas: I don't know- the stupid radio kept going in and out.
Dustin: It's like riddles in the dark.
Mike: "Like home"... like his house?
Lucas: Or maybe like Hawkins!
Eleven: Upside down...
Lucas: What'd she say?
Mike: Upside down...
Lucas: What?
Mike: Upside down. When El showed us where Will was, she flipped the board over, remember? Upside down: dark, empty.
Lucas: Do you understand what he's talking about?
Dustin: No.
Mike: Guys, come on, just think about it: when El took us to find Will, she took us to his house, right?
Lucas: Yeah and he wasn't there.
Mike: But what if he was there? What if we just couldn't see him? What if he was on the other side?
[flips the game board right side up]
Mike: What if this is Hawkins...
[flips it right side down]
Mike: ... and this is where Will is? The upside down.
Dustin: Like the Vale of Shadows.

Dustin: [speaking into payphone to no one] Hello. Yes. I am fine how are you.

Mike: What's he saying?
Dustin: I don't know, he's way out of range.
Mike: Lucas, if you can hear us, slow down. We can't understand you.
Lucas: Yes! I copy! Do you? They know about Eleven! Get out of there! They know about Eleven! The bad men are coming! All of them! Do you hear me? The bad men are coming!
Dustin: "Mad Hen"... Does that mean anything to you, like a code name or something?
Lucas: [over the radio] The bad men are coming!
Mike: Bad men... bad men!
[to El]
Mike: Stay here!
Mike: [Dustin and Mike run upstairs to the window where a Hawkins repair truck sits] What's that guy doing?
Dustin: You don't think...?

Steve: Listen, dude, a coach calls a play in a game, bottom line, you execute it. All right?
Mike: Okay, first of all, this isn't some stupid sports game. And second, we're not even in the game we're on the bench.
Steve: Right, so my point is... Right, yeah, we're on the bench, so, uh, there's nothing we can do.
Dustin: That's not entirely true. I mean, these Demo-dogs, they have a hive mind. When they ran away from the bus, they were called away.
Lucas: So if we get their attention...
Max: Maybe we can draw them from the lab...
Mike: And clear a path to the gate.
Steve: Yeah, and then we all die!
Dustin: That's one point if view.
Steve: No, that's not a point of view, man. That's a fact.

Mike: Guys, guys! This is crazy. We can't just wait around.
Lucas: Mike, in case you forgot, we're still fugitives. The bad men are still looking for us.
Dustin: Yeah and we don't even know where your sister is.
Mike: El can find them.
Dustin: [pointing] Mike, look at her! I still think we should stick to the Chief's plan.
Lucas: Exactly. We stay here, keep El out of sight and keep her safe. That's the most important thing, remember? Besides, she's okay. She's with Jonathan.
Dustin: Yeah and she's kind of a badass now, so...
[begins to walk away]
Mike: Well, where are you going? You just said stick to the plan!
Dustin: I am, I'm just going to get some chocolate pudding! I'm telling you lunch lady Phyllis hoards that shit!
Mike: Are you serious?
Dustin: El needs to be recharged!

Dustin: I don't see him.
Lucas: It's the lab.
- They were going back home.

Max: If I play, do I get one of those cool T-shirts?
Dustin: [laughs] Yes.
Max: Really?
Dustin: Everyone gets a T-shirt. We make 'em ourselves, and if you... You're being sarcastic. You being sarcastic?
Max: [goes away]
Dustin: She was being sarcastic.

- No, no, no!
Dustin: Oh, my god. Oh, my god.
- See over there?
[Stammers] That's the bathroom.
- Privacy. Get it?

Dustin: Bada-bada-boom!

Dustin: …to open a tear in time and space, just like the Mothergate.
- Whoa.
Dustin: …are these like the Mothergate…
- But a gate nonetheless.

Dustin: He's never this late.
Lucas: I'm telling you, his stupid plan failed.
Dustin: I thought you liked his plan.
Lucas: Yeah, but obviously it was stupid, or he'd be here.

Lucas: If I get in good with these guys, I'll be in the popular crowd, and then you guys will be too.
Mike: Has it ever occurred to you that we don't want to be popular?
Lucas: So you wanna be stuck with the nerds and freaks for three more years?
Dustin: We ARE nerds and freaks!

- -Holy shit.
- -Holy shit.
- Holy shit. That was incomprehensible.
- You lost me at "Mothergate."
- Please be kind. Rewind.
Dustin: Okay, so remember the gate?
Erica: Oh, no. I blocked that out.
Erica: So what was that giant laser?

Mike: Four years ago!
Dustin: Just saying.
Lucas: Later.
- It was a seven.
- Huh?
- The roll, it was a seven.
- The demogorgon, it got me.
[Grunts] See you tomorrow.

Max: Are they rabid or something?
- They can't get in! They can't!
Dustin: Shit!
- Is anyone there? Mike? Will? God! Anyone!
- Shit!
- We're at the old junkyard, and we are going to die!

Dustin: [watching Mike give El a sleeping bag] You really think she's psycho?
Lucas: Wouldn't want her in my house.

- What are you doing?
- I told him to stop. We need to go.
Dustin: Mike!
- Right now. Right now!
- So, your sister coming or what?
- Screw it. That little shit can skate home.
- And don't call her that.
- What?
- Sister. She's not my sister.

Dustin: Um... Hi, Max. I'm Dustin, and this is...
Lucas: Lucas.
Max: Yeah, I know. The stalkers.
Lucas: Uh, no. Actually... We weren't stalking you.
Dustin: No, we were just concerned because, you know, you're new and all.
Lucas: Yeah! For your safety.
Dustin: Mmm-hmm. There are a lot of bullies here.
Lucas: So many bullies, its crazy.
Max: Is that why you're wearing proton packs?
Dustin: Well, these don't function. But! I do have this handy-dandy little trap here. And look, it even opens and closes. Look, look, look...
[Opens Trap]
Dustin: Voila! It's cool, right? No? Okay! But, um... So, we were talking last night, and you're new here, so you probably don't have any friends to take you trick-or-treating, and you're scared of bullies, so we were thinking that it would be okay if you come with us.
Max: It'd be okay?
Dustin: Yeah! Our party's a democracy, and the majority voted you could come.
Max: I didn't realize it was such an honor to go trick-or-treating with you.
Dustin: Yeah, I mean, we know where to get the full-sozed candy bars. We figured you'd want in.
Max: That's presumptuous of you.
Dustin: ...Yeah. Totally. Uh, so, um... You'll come?
[Max walks away]
Dustin: We're meeting at the Maple Street cul-de-sac at 7:00. That's 7:00 on the dot!
[to Lucas]
Dustin: Presumptuous. That's a good thing, right?
Lucas: [sighs and walks away]
Dustin: Is it bad? Lucas, is it bad? Lucas? Son of a bitch, Lucas! Is it bad?

Mike: [Washing dirt off El's face] That's better.
[El looks at herself in the mirror. She touches her head where her wig used to be]
Mike: [Reassuring] You don't need it.
Eleven: Still pretty?
Mike: Yeah! Pretty. Really pretty... El?
Eleven: Yes?
Mike: Um, I'm happy you're home.
Eleven: Me too.
[They move closer as Dustin bursts in]
Dustin: Guys! It's Lucas! I think he's in trouble.
[running for the walkie talkie]
Dustin: Do you remember how he said he was looking for the gate?
Mike: Yeah?
Dustin: What if he found it?

[while looking for music to save Nancy from Vecna]
Erica: Steve says you need to hurry!
Dustin: Yeah, no shit!
Max: We're trying, we can't find anything!
Robin: [frantically searching through a pile of cassette tapes] Seriously, what is all this shit?
Eddie: I mean, what are you even looking for?
Robin: Madonna, Blondie, Bowie, Beatles? Music! We need music!
Eddie: [grabs an Iron Maiden tape out of her hand] *this* is music!

Dustin: Okay. Seriously? How many times do I have to be right on the money before you guys just trust me?
Steve: Jesus Christ this kid's gotta get his ego in check
Eddie: It's his tone. Right?
Steve: I know!

Mike: I just... I can't believe she didn't come back.
Dustin: She's gotta be close.
Mike: She said it wasn't safe. She just messed up the compasses because she wanted to protect us. She didn't betray us!
Dustin: Mike, calm down.
Mike: I shouldn't have yelled at her, I never should have done that.
Dustin: Mike, this isn't your fault.
Mike: Yeah, it's Lucas's.
Dustin: It wasn't his fault either.
Mike: It wasn't his fault?
Dustin: No!
Mike: So your saying he wasn't way out of line?
Dustin: Totally! But so were you!
Mike: What?
Dustin: And so was Eleven!
Mike: Oh, give me a break!
Dustin: No, Mike, you give me a break! All three of you were being a bunch of little assholes! I was the only reasonable one! But the bottom line is... You pushed first. And you know the rule. You draw first blood...
Mike: No! No way! I'm not shaking his hand!
Dustin: You're shaking his hand!
Mike: No I'm not!
Dustin: This isn't a discussion. This is the rule of law. Obey or be banished from the party. Do you wanna be banished?
Mike: ...No
Dustin: Good
Mike: Where are we going?
Dustin: Where do you think? We're going to get Lucas. And then, we're gonna find Eleven.

Dustin: I'm sorry. You ate my cat.

Dustin: Okay, it's official. I'm never having kids.

Dustin: [after El flips the van to help them escape] Did- did you see what she did to that van?
Mike: [sarcastic] No, Dustin, we missed it.
Dustin: I mean that was... that was...
Lucas: Awesome. That was awesome.
[goes to El]
Lucas: Everything I said about you being a traitor and stuff... I was wrong. I'm sorry.
Eleven: Friends... friends don't lie. I'm sorry too.
Mike: Me too.
[Holds out his hand. He and Lucas shake]

Steve: You ready?
Mike: Yeah.
Lucas: Ready.
Max: Ready.
Dustin: Light her up.
[Steve panting] I am in such deep shit.

Dustin: [whenever the kids are about to do something stupid] Let's engage!

- -Crit hit!
- -Yeah!
- What? What?
- That's why we play.
Dustin: Yes! Yes!

Dustin: Holy shit - you're a nerd!
Erica: Come again?
Dustin: You... are... a... nerd!
Erica: Okay, you better take that back, nerd!
Dustin: Can't put the truth back in the box.
Erica: But it's not the truth.
Dustin: Let's examine the facts, shall we? Fact one: you're a math whiz, apparently...
Erica: That was a pretty straightforward equation.
Dustin: Fact two: you're a political junkie...
Erica: Just because I don't agree with communism as an ideology...
Dustin: [holding up her backpack] Fact number three: you LOVE 'My Little Pony.'
Erica: And what does 'My Little Pony' have to do with this?
Dustin: Let's recall the ponies' latest adventure, shall we? The evil centaur team and Tyrek turns Applejack into a dragon at Midnight Castle, and Megan and the other ponies have to use Moochik's magic to defeat his rainbow of darkness, saving them from a lifetime of enslavement. All the pink in the world can't disguise the irrefutable fact that centaurs and castles and dragons and magic are all standard nerd tropes. Ergo, 'My Little Pony' is nerdy, ergo, you, Erica, are a nerd.
Erica: And how do YOU know so much about 'My Little Pony?'
Dustin: Because, I'm a nerd.
[finishes shutting off the fan]
Dustin: Let's go... Nerd.

Dustin: [Upon finding the pudding] Found it! I knew she was hoarding it- knew it! Always lying, saying she's out. Baldfaced liar.
[screaming]
Dustin: Mike! I found the chocolate pudding!

- -[sobs] Okay.
- -[Jonathan] Need you to stay real still.
- Here, you're gonna want to bite down on this, okay?
Dustin: Jesus Christ.
Dustin: Holy shit. Holy shit.
- Do it.
- Okay.

Dustin: [as the group steals an RV from its owners] Shit, they look pissed.
Robin: It's not every day you lose your house and car in one fell swoop.

Lucas: [seeing Steve's naked chest] When'd Steve get so hairy?
Dustin: Right? I keep telling him he needs to tame that jungle, but he claims the ladies dig it.

- -It's been like this all summer.
- -It's romantic.
- -It's gross.
- -It's bullshit.
- I just got home.
Dustin: Well, their loss, right?
- Onwards and upwards!
- -Suzie awaits!
- -[both sigh]

Dustin: She's our friend and she's crazy! You come back here and she'll kill you, you hear me, she'll *kill* you!

Lucas: Steve!
Max: Billy!
Mike: Holy shit!
- Shit!
- No one tells me what to do! [Grunts]
- Whoo! Get up!
Dustin: You're gonna kill him.

Mike: Kill it! Go, go, go, go!
Dustin: Kill it now!
- Get, get, get...
- Come on, kill the bastard!
- It's not working!
- Hit him again.
- Kill him!
Mike: Keep going! Come on!
- Get, get, get...
- Come on, kill it!
- Come on! Go, go, go!

- -What is that?
- -[Mike] There's something in there.
- -[Eleven] No!
- -Jesus Christ.
- Keep her talking.
- Keep her awake, okay?
Dustin: Jesus Christ.

Jonathan: Come on.
Lucas: Dustin farted!
Will: Bye, guys.
[Mike and Dustin] Bye, will.
Mike: See you, will.
[Chuckles] Stop.
- No, you stop.
Dustin: No, you stop.
Dustin: Yeah, scream!
- You're like a little girl.

Mike: [after the boys listen to the walkie talkie] We keep losing the signal. But you heard it, right?
Lucas: Yeah. I heard a baby.
Mike: What?
Lucas: Mike, you obviously tapped into a baby monitor. It's probably the Blackburns next door.
Mike: Uh, did that sound like a baby to you? That was Will.
Lucas: Mike...
Mike: Lucas, you don't understand. He spoke last night- words! He was singing that weird song he loves. Even El heard him.
Lucas: Oh well, if the weirdo heard him, then I guess...
Dustin: Are you sure you're on the right channel?
Mike: I don't think it's about that. I think somehow, *she's* channeling *him*.
Dustin: Like Professor X!
Lucas: Are you actually believing this crap?
Dustin: I don't know, I mean... do you remember when Will fell of his bike and broke his finger? He sounded a lot like that.
Lucas: Did you guys not see what I saw? They pulled Will's body out of the water. He's dead!
Dustin: Well, maybe it's his ghost; maybe he's haunting us.
Mike: It's not his ghost.
Lucas: And how do you know that?
Mike: I just do.
Lucas: Then what was in that water?
Mike: I don't know! All I know is, Will's alive. Will is alive! He's out there somewhere. All we have to do is find him.
[El tries the radio again]
Mike: This isn't gonna work. We need to get El to a stronger radio.
Dustin: Mr. Clarke's Heathkit Ham Shack!
Lucas: The Heathkit's at school. There's no way we're gonna get the weirdo in there without anyone noticing. I mean... *look* at her.
[the boys stare. El stares back, confused]

- You just saved the world.
- Gosh, I miss you, Dusty-bun.
- And I miss you more, Suzie-poo.
- I miss you more, multiplied by all the stars in our galaxy.
Dustin: No, I miss you--
- Enough.

- Says who?
- Says logic.
- Well, I call bull on your logic, because you're my best friend, too.
- Okay.
- Whoa.
Dustin: You don't think...
[Panting] Uh... definitely.

- and these agents were trying to shoot us...
- Yeah, it flipped over us...
- Then she squeezed the brains out...
Dustin: And blood was pouring out of their faces.
Mike: It was pouring out of their eyes.
Lucas: Agents just started grabbing us and stuff...
Dustin: ...Shot out of the wall...

Eddie: [looking at Erica] Absolutely not.
Dustin: You asked for a sub. We delivered.
Eddie: This is Hellfire Club. Not Babysitting Club.
Erica: I'm 11, you long-haired freak.
Eddie: My, my, the child speaks.
[stands up from the chair and walks over to Erica]
Eddie: So, what's your name, child?
Erica: Erica Sinclair.
Erica: [chuckles] So this is Sinclair's infamous sister.
Erica: [looks at Dustin and Mike] He's sharp.
[other members of the club laugh]
Eddie: [glances at the members laughing and they stop]
Eddie: What's your class and level? Level one dwarf?
[other members of the club laugh again]
Erica: My name is Lady Applejack. And I'm a chaotic good half-elf rogue, level 14. And I will sneak behind any monster you throw my way and stab them in the back with my poison-soaked kukri. And I'll smile as I watch them die a slow, agonizing death. So, we gonna do this, or we gonna keep chitchatting like this is your mommy's book club?
[pause]
Eddie: [reaches his hand to Erica] Welcome to Hellfire.

Dustin: I wish everyone had gotten to know him. Really know him. Because they would've loved him, Mr. Munson. They would've loved him. Even in the end... he never stopped being Eddie. Despite everything. I never even saw him get mad. He could've run. He could've saved himself. But he fought. He fought and died to protect this town. This town that... hated him. He isn't just innocent... Mr. Munson, he's... he's a hero.

Dustin: Slow down.
Steve: We're losin' him.
- -You're getting too close.
- -Watch it, dickwad.
[in monotone voice] Hello. Yes. I am fine.
- How are you?

- No, mom, nothing's wrong in the house.
Dustin: Mike!
- One second.
[Yells] Mike!
- We need to leave...
[Panting] Right now.
- Michael!
- If anyone asks where I am,
- I've left the country.
- What?

Dustin: [as El emerges full made over] Wow. She looks...
Mike: -Pretty...
[El half smiles and Mike catches himself]
Mike: ... Good. You look pretty good.
Eleven: [looking at herself in the mirror] Pretty... good.

Steve: [Steve sighs]
Dustin: Was that a sigh?
Steve: No, I did not sigh.
Dustin: Why'd you sigh?
Steve: I didn't sigh. Just come on, dude.
Dustin: I heard you.
Steve: Well... we're just always partners, okay?
Dustin: Wh- you have a problem with that?
Steve: It'd just be nice to, you know, I don't know, mix it up a bit.
Dustin: So what, I'm boring you? Is that it?

Dustin: It's just a dream.
- You're dreaming.

Dustin: I'll fit. Trust me. No collar bones, remember?
Robin: Uh, excuse me?
Steve: Oh, he's, uh Yeah, he's got some disease. Chry, uh, It's chrydo, um... something. Yeah, I dunno. He's missing bones and stuff. He can bend like Gumbo.
Robin: You mean Gumby.
Steve: I'm pretty sure it's Gumbo.

Mike: [trying to get to the Heathkit] It's locked.
Lucas: What?
Dustin: [to El] Hey, do you think you can open it? With your powers?
Mr. Clarke: Boys?
[they freeze]
Mr. Clarke: Assembly's about to start.
Mike: We know. We're just... you know...
Lucas: Upset.
Dustin: Ye-yeah, definitely upset.
Mike: And we need some alone time.
Dustin: To... cry.
Mr. Clarke: Yeah, listen, I get it. I do. I know how hard this is. But let's just be there for Will, huh? And then...
[tosses the keys to Mike]
Mr. Clarke: the Heathkit is all yours for the rest of the day. What do you say?
[Noticing El]
Mr. Clarke: I don't believe we've met. What's your name?
Eleven: Eleve...
Mike: Eleanor! She's my, uh...
Lucas: Cousin!
Dustin: Second cousin!
Mike: She's here for Will's funeral.
Mr. Clarke: Ah well, welcome to Hawkin's middle, Eleanor. I wish you were here under better circumstances.
Eleven: Thank you.
Mr. Clarke: Where are you from exactly?
Eleven: Bad place...
Dustin: Sweden!
Mike: I have a lot of Swedish family.
Dustin: She hates it there.
Lucas: Cold.
Dustin: Subzero.
Mr. Clarke: [Confused] Shall we?

[first lines]
Mike: [reading from the playbook] Something is coming. Something hungry for blood. A shadow grows on the wall behind you, swallowing you in darkness. It is almost here.
Will: What is it?
Dustin: What if it's the Demogorgon? Oh, Jesus, we're so screwed if it's the Demogorgon.
Lucas: It's not the Demogorgon.
Mike: An army of *troglodytes* charge into the chamber!
[slams down a playing card]
Dustin: Troglodytes?
Lucas: Told ya.
Mike: Wait a minute. Did you hear that? That, that sound? Boom boom Boom!
[slaps the table again]
Mike: That didn't come from the troglodytes. No, that That came from something else. The Demogorgon!
[slams down a Demogorgon figure]

- Where's dart?
- I don't know. Not here.
- What?
Max: He said by salerno's, right?
Dustin: Yeah, maybe will has him.
- Where is will?
- Only this time, I didn't run.
- This time, I stood my ground.

- Billy, stop it!
Dustin: Whoa!
- Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!
- Yeah! That was a close one, huh?
Dustin: Holy shit!
- Was that...
- Mad Max.

Dustin: [calling his girlfriend on the ham radio] Suzie, do you copy?

Dustin: Hey! Hey!
- I didn't say "go"!
- Get back here!
- I'm gonna kill you!
Will: I'll take your x-men 134!
- Son of a bitch.

Dustin: Guys I really think we should turn back.
Lucas: Seriously, Dustin? You want to be a baby, then go home already!
Dustin: I'm just being realistic, Lucas!
Lucas: No you're being a big sissy!
Dustin: Did you ever think maybe Will went missing because he ran into something bad? And we're going to the exact same spot where he was last seen? And we have no weapons or anything?
Mike: Dustin, shut up.
Dustin: I'm just saying: does that seem smart to you?
Mike: Shut up, shut up... did you guys hear that?

Dustin: The Hive Mind. A collective consciousness. It's a super-organism.
Mike: And this is the thing that controls everything. It's the brain.
Dustin: Like the Mind Flayer.

- Hurry! Eddie, shut it!
- -[fence clatters]
- -[Eddie grunts]
Dustin: Hurry! Come on!
- Dude!
- -Most metal ever!
- -Oh my... Oh my God.
- -[excited hollering fades]
- -[light buzzes, flickers]