The Best Ensign Williams Quotes

[the Enterprise goes through a series of system failures while facing a Romulan battle cruiser]
Wesley: Sir, the shields are back up.
Commander William T. Riker: Impeccable timing!
Wesley: Sir, the shields are back down.
Ensign: Phaser banks are down.
Wesley: Shields are back up.
Counselor: In another time and place, this could be funny.
Commander William T. Riker: Status of torpedo banks?
Ensign: They're down too.
Commander William T. Riker: [frustrated] If it should become necessary to fight, could you arrange to find me some rocks to throw at them?