The Best Joel Hodgson Quotes

Mayor: Hello, everyone. Thanks for coming. Wow! This whole abduction business was a real close call, huh? Whoo. But look around you. Everyone is safe and accounted for.
Sadie: That's not true! What about my friend Lars?
Mayor: Who?
Sadie: What? Lars! Lars Barriga? Mr. and Mrs. Barriga's son? Did you even know he was still missing? Did you know he was still somewhere in space? What kind of mayor doesn't know when his own people are lost in space?
Mayor: The donut boy? Is that why the donut shop was closed this morning?
Sadie: Yeah, but...
Mayor: Do not worry. I will do everything in my power to hire a new donut boy.
[the crowd boos]
Steven: No!
Sadie: You've got to be kidding me.
[Lars' mother throws a tomato at Dewey's face]

Discotheque: Aren't you one of those guys who's always running in here yelling 'disco sucks?' What's the matter, cat got your bong, man? Is that how you learned to communicate? Running in here and yelling stuff? Is that what your precious "rock and roll" teaches you?
Ken: No, it teaches me that DISCO SUCKS!