30 Best The Eiger Sanction Quotes

Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Pope, I really don't mind you being an asshole, you really can't help that, but I do mind you lying to me like I was a fool. Now you came here with one thought in mind, and that was to attach yourself to me so the target would know who I am and what I am. Now, who's gonna perform this sanction if he gets me? You?
Pope: You don't think I can handle it?
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: In a locked closet with a grenade.

[Bowman watches the climb through his telescope]
British: I say, old boy, are you using your scope? Do you mind if my wife has a peek.
British: Darling, tell him we'll pay for it.
British: We can pay for it, you know.
Ben: Get out of here. Either of you friggin' vampires ever touch this telescope, you're gonna need surgery to get it out of your ass!

Jonathan: Why did she do it?
Ben: Oldest reason in the world.
Jonathan: Love?
Ben: Money!

Woman Journalist: Tell me, Mr. Bowman, in your opinion do these men climb to prove their manhood, or is it more a matter of compensating for inferiority feelings?
Ben: Lady, why don't you go get yourself screwed. It would do you a lot of good.

Dragon: Good luck, Hemlock, on your latest assignment: the Eiger sanction.

Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: You think it's so awful the other side has a germ formula? It's against the Geneva Convention, isn't it, and they stole it from us. Well what the hell are we doing with it in the first place? We're not supposed to have one either.
Jemima: And you don't see any difference between their side and our side?
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Yeah, I see a difference. But as long as we have Dragon and Pope working for us, how bad can the other side be?

[Referring to Hemlock's written assessment]
Jemima: Crap?
Jonathan: Excuse me? You did just start this conversation off by saying crap didn't you?

Miles: For what I want in this world, I would even sell out my dear mother.
Jonathan: How true!

Ben: You know what? Way down deep you've got the makings of a real bad ass. I don't know that I'd like to be alone on a desert island with you if there was a shortage of food.
Jonathan: No worry, you're a friend.
Ben: You ever had any enemies?
Jonathan: A few.
Ben: Any of them still around?

Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: FREYTAG, YOU ASSHOLE!

Ben: He looks like he could change a nine-dollar bill in threes.

Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: [to his class] Some of you will continue in your education. Some of you will continue with your interest in art. Some of you will have interests other than that. If we've learned nothing else this year, I hope you've learned the stupidity of the statement that art belongs to the world. 'Cause art belongs to the cultivated who can appreciate it. The majority of the great unwashed does not fit into this category... and neither, I'm sorry to say, do most of you.

Jemima: Fasten your seat belt, sir.
Jonathan: Oh, I have no intention of trying to escape.

[Hemlock saves Meier from falling off the mountain]
Anderl: You're very good. I have really enjoyed climbing with you.
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: We'll make it.
Anderl: I don't think so. But we shall continue with style.

Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Goddamn it, I wish Custer had won.

Jonathan: [after fighting and stepping on Popes hand] Okay, you'll be alright now Pope. Of course you may have trouble playing the clarinet for awhile.

Jonathan: However you never know. Sometimes people do things they thought they'd never do again. Like rape, for instance. Yeah I thought I'd given up rape but I've changed my mind.

Jemima: Friends? Enemies? Where do I fit in?
Jonathan: I'm sorry, but you don't. Here's to the selfish killer and the patriotic whore! Do you have anything else to say? I usually keep a twenty in the bowl by the door. You might pick it up on the way out!

[repeated line]
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: How true.

Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: It's dangerous, child, to come to conclusions when you don't have any facts. Now let me lay some on you. Sure Dragon knows what he's doing, just like he knew what he was doing when he worked for the Nazis during World War II.
Jemima: What?
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Oh, you didn't know that, did you? Yes your "wrap him up in red, white, and blue" Mr. Dragon's a goddamn Hessian, that's what he is. And he'd sell out the other side as fast as he'd sell out our side. And he'd sell out his mother, too, if the bloodless freak had one.

Ben: This is were I turn back.
Jonathan: Thank God.
Ben: Not you, you need the work. George there will take you on up.
Jonathan: It's a girl.
Ben: A lot of people notice that.

Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Are you busy this evening?
Art: No.
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: You live alone?
Art: My roommate's gone for the week.
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Good. Then... go on home, break out the books and study your little ass off. That's the best way to maintain a "B" average. Don't study it all off.

Ben: A Foehn: warm air, then rain, then a freeze like all in a flash...... that entire mother of a rock is gonna be covered in ice but you can't walk on it, you can't see through it or find a crack in the rocks to drive your peton into because the snow is all glazed over, but you'll be able to drop through up to your neck at any time.

Dragon: [sitting in his dark lair] Even the slightest direct light causes me intense pain.
Jonathan: Does your physical disability preclude you from coming to the point?

Jonathan: They kill one of ours, we kill the killers. No purpose at all, just barbaric.
Jemima: You're getting religion a little late.
Jonathan: I didn't quit because of religion, I quit because of mathematics.
Jemima: Oh?
Jonathan: That's right. The odds are stacking up against me. Assassins who stay too long wind up getting assassinated, and that ain't in my game plan.

Ben: Wanna Beer?
Jonathan: You gonna call room service?
Ben: We got beer.
Jonathan: If you hauled beer up this rock you're insane!
Ben: I may be insane, but I'm not stupid. I didn't carry it, you did! It's in your pack.
Jonathan: Christ, I ought'a throw you off this pillar! Besides, it's warm.
Ben: Oh I'm sorry, I thought you'd draw the line on haulin' ice.

Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Screw Marlon Brando.

Karl: I consider it self-defeating to plan in terms of retreat.
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: I consider it stupid not to.

Pope: Search Division has drawn a blank on the target. All we know is he's here somewhere.
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Miles Mellough knew who it was.
Pope: He did? Did he tell you?
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: He offered to, but the price was too high.
Pope: Well, what'd he want, then?
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: To live.

Jemima: Is this hotel always so crowded?
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Only when there's a climb. Then the Eiger birds start flocking in.
Jemima: Eiger birds?
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: Yeah, jet setters, assorted zombies, come here to watch a climb. If they're lucky, they get to see a man die on the mountain.
Jemima: That's grim.
Dr. Jonathan Hemlock: So's the Eiger.