The Best Armand Quotes

[Roxie just caught Jonathan making love to Emmy as she assumes mannequin form]
Roxie: [to herself] I really should have listened when he asked me for help.
Armand: When you making love to him, did you ever scream 'Don't stop, Woody!'?
[Roxie pushes Armand down the escalator]
Roxie: [hearing something break, alarmed] Oh, my camera!

Roxie: [seeing Jonathan and Emmy leaving] He's out of his mind! B.J. was right. When I get that dummy, I'm gonna just tear her hair out!
Armand: Roxie! You know what you need to do right now? You need to put him and this whole nasty affair out of your mind. Now, how is the best way to do that, huh? By having a night of distastable sex with someone you care absolutely nothing about! And proudly, I would like to be that person.
Roxie: Fine, let's just go to your place.
Armand: [suddenly surprised] Really?
Roxie: Drive fast before I have second thoughts!
Armand: Armand is the wind!