The Best Jennifer Tilly Quotes

[In the motel room, Fran and Rudy are having sex. Fran is moaning in pleasure as Harold, tied up in a chair, drags himself to the opened door to find Fran cheating on him as they're performing the woman-on-top position]
Harold: [screams] Hey! HEY!
Fran: [laughs] It's Harold!
[Fran and Rudy laugh as they cover themselves]
Rudy: Harold, get back in there, ya pervert.
[Rudy shuts the bathroom door on him; Harold screams and groans in anger and agony]

Stuart: Good-bye, fake father! Good-bye, fake mother!
Mrs. Stout: Good-bye, fake son!
[Stuart drives off in the toy car]
Mrs. Stout: I'm gonna miss that boy.
Mr. Stout: I'm gonna miss that car.

Fran: What's the plan?
Rudy: The plan is shut up.

Kim: Wow. Nice place. You really are a doctor.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Yes. Would you like the tour?
Kim: [suggestively] I don't know. What do you want to show me?
Dr. Frasier Crane: [playing along, hesitantly] I don't know. Uh, what do you want to see?
Kim: What would you like me to see?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Whatever you came here to see.
Kim: And what did I come here to see?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Is there and end to this? Because I'm starting to feel redundant on my part.

Kim: The first few months I was a wreck. We were engaged. At least, I was. But now, I know I'm ready to move on.
[suggestively]
Kim: Really, really ready.
Dr. Frasier Crane: You know, it's kind of funny. I'm actually trying to get over someone myself, in a manner of speaking.
Kim: And you thought she was the one, right?
Dr. Frasier Crane: Well, she may have been. I'm just trying to put her out of my mind, right now. I must say, you're proving to be a delightful distraction.
Kim: Well, that's not the nicest thing anybody's ever called me in a bar. But it's not the worst.

Kim: I've got a little outfit you might like.
Dr. Frasier Crane: The littler it is, the more I like it.
Kim: I love it when I say something and then you say something funny.

Kim: This is fun. But, I'm kinda thinkin' that I'd like to go someplace a little less... crowded.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Okay. Uh, well, thank you, I enjoyed our time together.
Kim: No, I meant someplace... a little more private.
Dr. Frasier Crane: No, I understand completely. I take no offence.
Kim: Your place.
Dr. Frasier Crane: Oh, yes, yes indeed. Well, should we go together to my place or...? Well, you must have your own car so I could give you directions or, well, we could drive together and then I could drive you back here or we could drive together and then you could get a cab back here...
Kim: [Kim puts her hand over his mouth] I don't care how we get there, let's just get there!