The Best Lt. Mike Lowrey Quotes

Mike: [Repeated line] Marcus you can't see shit

Mike: [to Manny] Did you just get pig fat on my suit?

[first lines]
Marcus: [speeding through the streets of Miami] MIKE!
Mike: Whooo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooooo!
Marcus: What the hell are you doing?
Mike: It's called driving, Marcus.

Mike: [Marcus starts to cry while holding his grandchild] Uh uh. Ok, that's that shit.
Marcus: No, Mike.
Mike: Stop it.
Marcus: The baby...
Mike: Seriously!
Marcus: Look at the baby...
Mike: OK, you know what? I'll be outside when you get your shit together.
[leaves]
Marcus: [still emotional] Mike, the baby...

Mike: Hey, nobody touches the shooter. He's mine!
Marcus: Uh, yes he is...

[Lowrey gets out of his Porsche 911. Burnett opens the passenger door and accidentally hits a fire hydrant]
Mike: Hey!
Marcus: [struggling to get out while banging the door on the fire hydrant] Oh, shit! Oh!
Mike: Come on, man!
Marcus: You can get that buffed out.
Mike: No. You can get that buffed out.

Marcus: So, what you gonna do when you see him? You really gonna put your son behind bars?
Mike: No. I'm gonna kill him.
Marcus: Kill him? You really gonna kill your own son, Mike?
Mike: I'm gonna put him in a fucking bag.
Marcus: You realize you will go to hell?
Mike: I don't believe in hell, Marcus.
Marcus: Well, it believes in you. I mean, killing your own son. Brother, that's a darkness that swallows you whole.
Mike: Well, maybe I've already been swallowed. I died, remember? I'm ending this shit, man.

[Mike "shortcuts" to the hospital by driving his Porsche across the beach]
Mike: Sorry, rich white people!
Marcus: [showing his badge] We're not just black, we're cops too! We'll pull ourselves over later!

Marcus: I'mma penetrate this man's soul wit my heart.
Mike: What?

Mike: I've never trusted anybody but you. I'm asking you, man. Bad Boys, one last time?
Marcus: One last time.

Mike: [on Armando] He's the right age. He's crazy like me. He's ruthless like me. He's fearless like me. He's the fucked-up me.
Marcus: No, Mike. *You* the fucked-up you.

[the rookie cops start singing 'Bad Boys' in front of Lowrey and Burnett]
Mike: Hey, hey hey! Hey! Uh-uh! No! No! Never. Y'all will never do that again.
Marcus: Yeah, and you fucking up the lyrics, which take a long time to learn.

Marcus: Mike, all our life we've been bad boys. It's time to be good men.
Mike: Who in the hell would want to sing that song?
[singing]
Mike: "Good men, good men, whatcha gonna do?"
Marcus: Well, maybe if you sung it like you mean it, it'd catch on.

Captain: Look at all this carnage!
Mike: Aw come on Cap, I didn't do all this shit. They did this to each other.
Captain: Wait, wait. You didn't shoot anybody?
Mike: Well, come on Cap, you know I shot somebody.

Mike: [during a gunfight] Big man, I'm gonna need you to hurt some people! I'll pay for the therapy!
Dorn: I'm gonna need it!

Marcus: You're dyeing your goatee, Mike.
Mike: What?
Marcus: You're dyeing your goatee.
Mike: I'm not dyeing my goatee.
Marcus: Yeah, that's Midnight Cocoa Bean. I recognise that shit.

Marcus: Mike... you fucked a married witch?
Mike: All the shit I just said and that was your takeaway?