The Best Robber Quotes

Robber: I'll blow this whole city block.
Elongated: Uh, you do realize you're a part of that block, right? Come on, man, it's a weekday. People just want to get off work, go home, and watch the boob tube. So why don't you take off that vest and...
Robber: No, no, don't touch me!
[as Ralph removes the bomb and contains the blast, the robber passes out]
Iris: Ralph, are you okay?
Elongated: [coughing out smoke] Yeah. Just, uh, wicked heartburn.

Robber: All right, first, I want a car. Something eco-friendly, like, uh... like a Prius.
Joe: [a little taken aback] Okay, we can do that.
Robber: [oblivious to Ralph rescuing the hostages] Good. Uh, right. Now, second. Uh, I want a plane, okay? A private plane. Okay? And a salad, all right? I'm counting calories.
Joe: Okay, it's gonna take us an hour to arrange that.
Robber: You better hurry up, because these hostages don't have much time.
Elongated: [appearing, as the robber realizes the hostages are gone] Should have gone with a steak, pal. 'Cause it's the last decent meal you're getting for the next five to ten years.
Robber: Who the hell are you?
Elongated: Your friendly neighborhood superhero. You can call me...
[stammering]
Elongated: Mr... one second.
[into his comms]
Elongated: Guys, this is a huge moment for me. What's my name?
Cisco: I was wondering where you were going with that.

Joe: Fine, just tell us what you want.
Robber: I want you to back off, or I will detonate this thing.
Joe: Okay, calm down, nobody needs to get hurt today.
Robber: You just follow instructions, and everybody here gets to live to see the sunshine tomorrow. All right? And I'd better not see the Flash, either.

Robber: Hey, where are my hostages?
Elongated: Uh, bathroom break. They just couldn't hold it anymore. Don't worry, though, they're totally safe.
Robber: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Get back, freak.
Elongated: Freak? Oh, sticks and stones may break my bones, buddy. Well, they used to. Not anymore.