The Best Sebastian Quotes

Sebastian: I just want her to stop saying "Vomitorium", alright?
[son Miles makes a puking noise]
Sebastian: Oi, it's not funny.

Sophie: Mum is against plastic surgery.
Rachel: I am.
Sophie: Mum doesn't even wear makeup.
Rachel: I don't. I think it's dishonest. This is my face, take it or leave it. If you study history of art or anthropology...
Sebastian: [interjecting] Rachel got a first at Cambridge.
Rachel: [continuing] ... you learn that red lipstick mimics arousal and suggests the geography of the labia minora.
Sophie: [interrupting] Puke!
Rachel: [continuing] Whereas I have a lot of natural red pigment in my lips, so I really don't need it.
Sophie: Vomitorium!

Sebastian: So Hanna, is your mum and Dad still together?
Hanna: My mother is dead.
Sophie: [to Sebastian] Nice one, Dad.
Sebastian: I'm sorry to hear that. I lost my mum when I was very young, so...
Hanna: It's all right. It happened a long time ago.
Rachel: Hanna, what did your mum die of?
Hanna: Three bullets.
[Sebastian chokes on his wine]