The Best Det. Stavros Quotes

Lt. Theo Kojak: I see you got a new plant.
Det. Stavros: Yeah. Shirley's lonely.
Lt. Theo Kojak: Oh really? Eh, tell me, how could you tell?
Det. Stavros: Well, her leaves are drooping down. And, eh, she's not her same gay, vibrant, effervescent, ebullent self.
Lt. Theo Kojak: Ebullent self, huh? Well, she might have, eh, heartburn. Did you ever think of that?
Det. Stavros: That's why I got Sam.

Lt. Theo Kojak: [while talking about the first death] Yea, the usual not-so-hot-time-in-the-old-town-tonight. What time did he go off?
Det. Stavros: According to the medical examiner the time of of the subject's death was between one and two A.M. in the morning. Constant use of alcohol is indicated by hyperemia and irritative elements in the digestive tract mucosa.
Lt. Theo Kojak: You're kidding.
Det. Stavros: Blood sugar concentration at the time of decease was 35 per cent.
Lt. Theo Kojak: 35 per cent? Where's the decimal point?
Det. Stavros: Right here in front of the "3".
Lt. Theo Kojak: In front of the three?
[to Crocker]
Lt. Theo Kojak: Would you tell him what the difference between 35 per cent is and point thirty five, oh, forget about it.