Top 20 Quotes From Edward Winter

Colonel: You're dumb, Freedman, very dumb! But you've met your match in me!

Col. Samuel Flagg: I have enough pictures of your file to have you executed for the rest of your life.

Col. Samuel Flagg: Now read that back to me.
Cpl. Walter "Radar" O'Reilly: [reading dictation] Uh... Mary had a little lamb. Stop.
[pause]
Cpl. Walter "Radar" O'Reilly: My dog has fleas. Stop.
Col. Samuel Flagg: OK, continue. Mares-eat-oats and does-eat-oats, and I'll be home for Christmas. Signed
[pause]
Col. Samuel Flagg: Your loving son
[pause]
Col. Samuel Flagg: Queen Victoria.

Army Capt. Halloran: [Hawkeye is collecting contributions to pay off the man who's pretending Radar hit him with a Jeep] Hey, this is blackmail, you know. Maybe I ought to run him in.
Hawkeye: Maybe you will on your way home.

Army Capt. Halloran: [sitting down beside Cpl. Klinger, and seeing him in drag for the first time] Hey... Up close, you're a guy!
Cpl. Klinger: Far away too.

Colonel: What's your clearance?
Henry: Oh, I go through the door with about an inch to spare.
Colonel: I mean security wise.

Col. Samuel Flagg: Colonel, I want to talk to you in private, without the corporal.
Lt. Col. Henry Blake: Oh, you can say anything you want in front of him.
Col. Samuel Flagg: Okay, I will. Get out.

Col. Flagg: [Flagg is undercover as a rabbi] I'm not Flagg. I'm Captain Goldberg.
Hawkeye: Sorry, Rabbi Goldberg.
Hawkeye: [Hawkeye picks up a drink] L'chaim.
Col. Flagg: What's that mean?
Hawkeye: Bottoms up, from right to left.

Colonel: Hey, you!
Klinger: What?
Colonel: This is the army, soldier!
Klinger: I get that feeling too!
Colonel: Hey!
Klinger: What?
Colonel: The next time I see you, Tinker Bell, you'd better be in uniform and as GI as General MacArthur! You hear me?
Klinger: Loud and clear, Mary.

Col. Flagg: I am leaving tomorrow - with the penicillin!
Hawkeye: Over my dead body!
[Col. Flagg stares viciously at Hawkeye]
Hawkeye: Let me put that another way...

Col. Samuel Flagg: You'll never know what hit you. Your toothbrush could go off in your mouth, you could find a tarantula in your shorts, we could booby-trap a nurse.

Colonel Sherman T. Potter: But it takes more than four sound legs to make a stallion run. Takes a sound heart and a sound mind.
Colonel: It also takes a rider who's not afraid to go to the whip.

Col. Flagg: Congratulations. I've decided not to have you guys thrown out of the army.
Hawkeye: That's really hitting below the belt.

Army Col. Samuel Flagg: You gonna sign out my prisoner?
Hawkeye: Colonel, I have a more important problem on my hands. One of our teddy bears is missing.

Col. Flagg: [flipping open his litle book] Pierce and Mclntyre. Uh-huh. Oh, yes.
Henry: Red marks next to their names?
Col. Flagg: Unfriendlies.
Henry: Yellow next to mine?
Col. Flagg: Work on it.

Colonel: Major Freedman?
Dr. Sidney Freedman: Yeah?
Colonel: Colonel Flagg. We played poker once.
Dr. Sidney Freedman: Oh, sure. With Intelligence, right?
Colonel: I have nothing to do with intelligence.
Dr. Sidney Freedman: Better. You won't get worry lines.

Radar: Sir?
Hawkeye,65420: Yes?
Radar: Colonel sir?

Trapper: You're gonna kill yourself.
Col. Flagg: If I have to.
Trapper: Hey, that's the spirit.
Hawkeye: Yeah, if we had more men like you, we'd have less men like you.

Army Capt. Halloran: [about Klinger] What about her?
Capt. Sam Pak: She's my wife.
Dr. Sidney Freedman: Interesting joke, Sam.
Capt. Sam Pak: [tosses him a chip] Thanks for seeing me, Sidney.

Colonel: You think you're real smart. But you're not smart; you're dumb. Very dumb. But you've met your match in me.