The Best Jessica Hynes Quotes

John: How can you think I'm not real? When I kissed you, was that a lie?
Joan: No, it wasn't, no
John: But this 'Doctor' sounds like some, some romantic lost prince. Would you rather that? Am I not enough?
Joan: No, that's not true, never.
John: I've got to go.
Joan: Martha was right about one thing though; those boys, they're children. John Smith wouldn't want them to fight, never mind the Doctor. The John Smith I was getting to know... he knows it's wrong, doesn't he?
John: What choice do I have?

Barbara: How's your diet going, Cheryl?
Cheryl: Oh, all right thanks, yeah, Barbara, I lost 4 pounds... and then I put 2 back on and then another 2. But I've not gained any.
Barbara: Oh, well, I think you're doing ever so well to stick to it, love.

Denise: Cheryl, you look absolutely gorgeous.
Barbara: Oh, I love the way you've done your eyes. What have you used?
Cheryl: It's Boots own Number 7.
Dave: What's on the other eye?
[Jim chuckles]

Joan: Women might train to be doctors, but hardly a scivvy and hardly one of your colour.
Martha: Oh, d'you think? Bones of the hand. Carpal bones, proximal row: scaphoid, lunate, triquetral, pisiform. Distal row: trapezium, trapezoid, capitate, hamate. Then the metacarpal bones extending in three distinct phalanges: proximal, middle, distal.
Joan: You read that in a book.
Martha: Yes, to pass my exams!

Joan: I'm Sorry, John. But you wrote about it. The Blue Box. You dreamt of a blue box.
John: I'm not...
[tearful]
John: I'm John Smith, that's all I want to be, John Smith. With his life... and his job... and his love. Why can't I be John Smith? Isn't he a good man? Why can't I stay?
Martha: But we need the Doctor.
John: Who am I then? Nothing...? I'm just a story?

Joan: Answer me this - just one question, that's all. If the Doctor had never visited us, if he'd never chosen this place... on a whim... would anybody here have died?
[the Doctor does not answer]
Joan: You can go now.

Barbara: Oh, so, Cheryl, how's the diet coming along?
Cheryl: Oh, really, really, well, thanks.
Barbara: Aww, would you like a biscuit?
Cheryl: Yeah.

Denise: What time are we going down the Feathers?
Jim: Well, as soon as you're ready.
Cheryl: Right, I'll nip home and make meself beautiful.
Jim: Oh, are you just coming for last orders then?
[chuckles to himself]

Cheryl: [talking about Anthony] Has he got a girlfriend yet?
Denise: Yeah... His hand

Joan: Where did you learn to draw?
John: Gallifrey.
Joan: Is that in Ireland?
John: Yes it must be.
Joan: You're not Irish?
John: Not at all, no. My father Sydney was a watchmaker from Nottingham, and my mother Verity was - well, she was a nurse, actually.
Joan: Oh, we make such good wives!

Joan: It's all becoming clear. The Doctor is the man you'd like to be, doing impossible things with cricket balls.
John: Well, I discovered a talent, that's certainly true.
Joan: And the Doctor has an eye for the ladies...
John: The devil.
Joan: A girl in every fireplace.
John: Aha now, there I have to protest Joan, that's hardly me.
Joan: Says the man dancing with me tonight!

Cheryl: What have you given me Mam? She's gone as giddy as a kipper.
Barbara: Oh, she's had a mug of Pomagne.
Cheryl: Oh, I love Pomagne.
Barbara: Oh, I'm sorry, love. There's none left. There's a can of lager going begging.
Cheryl: Oh, no thanks, Barbara, I'm dieting. Me Mam's sponsoring me.
Jim: How much do you owe her?
[chuckles]

Joan: Where is he... John Smith?
The: He's in here somewhere.
Joan: Like a story... could you change back?
The: Yes.
Joan: Will you?
The: No.

Jim: I'm gonna go and have a chat with the Arabs.
Cheryl: What d'ya mean Jim?
Jim: Mustapha Crap.