Top 100 Quotes From Carey Lowell

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [barging in on Gorton's defense conference] You son of a bitch!
Neil: I take it you got my notice.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [rips up child custody notice and flings it on table] Yes. Here it is!
Neil: Not a legally persuasive argument, counselor. We have a custody arrangement; you're in breach.

Jamie: [When McCoy discovers that the murder victim had a juvenile record] It's not exculpatory evidence. Under Brady, we're under no obligation to turn it over to the defense.
Jack: They can argue it's evidence he had a reputation for sexual violence.
Jamie: Which is relevant only if she knew his reputation before she killed him. She can't say she did and claim she didn't know him.
Jack: Do you expect a jury to give a damn? I don't want this to come back and bite us in the ass in the middle of the trial.

D.A. Adam Schiff: And our Swiss banker friends...
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: ...who stole the coins in the first place.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Yeah. What refugees are they taking deposits from now, as they yodel their way to the bank?

[Pam is dressed in a white robe, making her look like an angel]
Dario: [slowly looks at her] Ha! Ha! Ha! You're dead!
Pam: [raises a gun] You took the words right out of my mouth!
[shoots him]

Hamida: What gives you the right to tell us how to live?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: What gives you the right to ignore the law?

Professor: [Referring to his affair with the victim] It wasn't grand passion, just wine at lunch, you know?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: I don't drink at lunch.
Professor: And I don't kiss and tell.

Chuck: [angrily, after McCoy and Ross have refused to cede jurisdiction to the Feds] So, what am I, the dog or the pony?
ADA: I don't know what you're talking about.
Chuck: I blew off a staff meeting to come here for this. Now, I came here in good faith and I expected to leave with a capital case.
ADA: I never promised you anything.
Chuck: Persona non grata, Jamie. Your calls don't get returned.
[storms out]
ADA: [winks at McCoy] He'll get over it.

[Bond heads for Pam's bedroom]
James: Good night, Q.
Pam: Sweet dreams, Mr. Bond.
[closes the door on him]
James: [sighing] I hope you don't snore, Q.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [after Curtis has had an altercation with McCoy outside the courtroom] What was that about?
Jack: He's just a little upset his wife's about to find out he had an affair on the evening news.
Detective: [to Curtis] I'm told you you should have gone to bed with her. You're getting the grief, you should have had the gravy.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Mrs Schoenberg, did you ever call a man named Richard Peterson about the coins?
Ann: No.
[grimaces]
Ann: If they were at my feet, I wouldn't bend down to pick them up.

Gina: Hayden said I could hang with them if I got them a good-looking girl.
Det. Rey Curtis: So now you're a pimp?
Gina: No, I just... I just...
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You just wanted everybody to think you were cool.

Jacob: [during plea negotiation] That was too easy. What's the catch? You've got eyewitnesses, ballistics, the murder weapon. Fingerprints. I mean, someone slip happy pills in your coffee?
Jack: The deal's on the table for another 30 seconds.
Jacob: I got bent over a chair by Ms Ross before. Now I'm getting another tingling sensation in my butt. Why is that?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Wishful thinking?

Lanie: Peel off the testosterone patch Ms. Ross, you're thinking under the influence.
Jamie: You can sing "I Am Woman" loud as you want, but it won't do your client any good.

Dr. Emil Skoda: You want me to make a diagnosis based on the word of an amateur?
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: Yeah. You got a problem with that?
Dr. Emil Skoda: OK... uh, he can't relate to others, has low tolerance for frustration, he's unpredictable. So far that's my kid. Now, the fear and suspicion, the whispering through the walls sounds like he's in the early stages of bipolar disorder.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Bipolar disorder.
Dr. Emil Skoda: Alternating cycles of depression and mania, periods of feeling better than normal, brighter and more energetic and charming. Hypersexuality and poor judgement. Then, suddenly, irritability, aggression, delusions of persecution, hearing voices.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: That's what's going on with this kid?
Dr. Emil Skoda: It's a third-hand diagnosis, take it for what it's worth. But, it might explain why the kid's a firebug.

Sal: The deceased jumped off a bridge on her own. Period.
Jamie: She jumped to get away from Mr. McDugan. He didn't have to push her.
Sal: She chose to die, Your Honor. My client isn't accountable for the actions of a disturbed individual.
Judge: Ms. Ross, it sounds like you're conceding Mr. McDugan didn't push her.
Jamie: He may not have physically pushed her, Your Honor, but...
Judge: But what? He levitated her?

Dr. Emil Skoda: [McCoy and Dr. Skoda are discussing Terry Lawlor's interview with the judge] I'm not a mind reader, Jack. 'Hi how are ya' is not a diagnostic question.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: You can't tell me anything?
Dr. Emil Skoda: He likes rollerblading and Nintendo. So do I.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: I don't get it. They should have jumped at the chance for the exam.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: They think they're gonna win.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: The way things are going, they're probably right. So, now what?
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: We go to trial. If they won't use his mental state to get him acquitted, fine. We'll use it to convict him. He set the fire because he's deluded.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: If he has a mental disease, he doesn't belong in prison, Jack.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: Maybe it won't come down to that.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: What if it does?
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: That's what they pay us for.

Jamie: You won, Jack. Just call Dressler's lawyer.
Jack: The discussion is over, Jamie.
Jamie: I'm not done!
Jack: I am! This is the District Attorney's office. We prosecute criminals. If you could stop thinking like a defense attorney, maybe you'd grasp the concept.
Jamie: I know why I'm here. I think you're the one who's forgotten.

A.D.A. Charlie Harmon: It went too far; I am sorry about that. Try to understand, Jamie.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: It's not in the job description.

Jack: [debriefing hitman] James Shepard.
Howard: What can I say? I guess the guy's number wasn't up.
Jack: It was your intention to kill him?
Howard: That's what I do.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You and your dog.
Howard: Pumpkin takes care of her business; I take care of mine.
Jack: And Estelle Muller hired you?
Howard: Yep. Takes all kinds, doesn't it?

[last lines]
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Redfield agreed to full restitution of the missing assets, and he gets off with having his license pulled for three years. He'll probably count this as a win.
Jack: He can drive up to Bedford and crow to Atkins about it.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Where on earth did these people learn their ethics?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Law school.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Of course.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Freedom of the press isn't free, Mr Bailey, but turning over your mailing list won't cost you a cent.
Gerald: I can't believe this: it's extortion.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: It's leverage.

Jack: This issue was decided! It was your own ruling!
Stan: Yeah - he ruled the search was illegal.
Jack: And that the evidence was nevertheless admissible against Miss Sullivan.
Stan: Because she had no standing! That was before we knew she was married to William Dunbar. A wife certainly has an expectation of privacy in an apartment she shares with her husband.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You had an opportunity to bring that fact to the court's attention then.
Stan: Not without incriminating my client - which I certainly am not obliged to do.
Judge: Anything else, Miss Ross? Mr. McCoy? Fine. Objection sustained. There'll be no mention of anything found in that apartment. By the way, Mr. McCoy - I never had a chance to congratulate you on your victory in appellate court.

[last lines]
[Bond kisses Pam after jumping into a swimming pool after her]
Pam: Why don't you wait until you're asked?
James: So why don't you ask me?

Neil: I wish you were working on my side of the aisle on this one. We were good together.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: ...in court. Everywhere else, we stunk.
Neil: [suggestively] Oh, how quickly they forget!
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [laughing] All right, there too.

Jack: [to Briscoe] Why did you change your mind?
Detective: You saw the crime scene photos and you have to ask me that? We made a mistake and she paid for it.
Jack: Do you understand the implications?
Detective: Yeah. The defense has a police report that says the opposite of what I'm saying.
Jack: Manetti will tear you to shreds on the stand. I can't stop it.
Detective: I can make the case.
Jack: Under oath?
Detective: You set it up. I'll be there.
[leaves the room]
Jack: We're indicting Lowry for attempted murder.
Jamie: For the incident on the stairs?
Jack: I'm not sending Briscoe to the lions without backup.
Jamie: What about the police report?
Jack: You heard the man. The police made a mistake.

Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: [looking at a photo of Terry Lawlor in his school yearbook] Looks pretty harmless in a jacket and tie.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You all do!

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: O'Hara would award custody to Medea.

Jamie: Mr. Bodak, if you can identify this man, we can re-arrest him.
Mike: Two days out of jail and you want me to save your ass? Tell your bosses it'll be 20 years before I owe them anything.
Jamie: You don't owe them. And since you barely knew Matthew Sherman, I guess you don't owe him either.
Mike: Hey, who owes me, Ms. Ross? You act like that other stuff never happened!
Jamie: I'm sorry.
Mike: Yeah, you're really good at that, saying you're sorry.
Jamie: I actually do feel sorry for you - a decent guy who got screwed. But when a decent guy has the opportunity to put a killer behind bars, he stands up.

Jamie: It's the ultimate betrayal, Jack. Wendy Singer was helpless. Her mother was supposed to protect her.
Jack: And Harding? He took the money, he pushed Wendy's IV aside, he removed her catheter and climbed on top of her. That's monstrous.

Hotel: Ah, Señor Bond. You'll be pleased to know your Uncle has arrived. I put him in your suite.
James: Thank you.
[Walks away from Hotel's Front Desk]
Pam: Your Uncle?
James: Let's make this a proper family reunion. Give me your gun.

D.A. Adam Schiff: [Hands a letter to McCoy] Addressed to me, belongs to you.
Jack: From the Bar Association Ethics Committee.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Dues check bounced?

Gina: [to Ross] You know, I know a lot of guys who don't go out on Saturday night without a rubber and a roofie.
Jamie: Has it happened to you? Is that where Danielle got her story?
Gina: You know what? The hell with you. You ask any of our friends. Those niggers are always trying to scam white girls. They all want a piece of this and if they have to rape you to get it, they will.
[storms off]

[after Bond has introduced Pam as his executive secretary Miss Kennedy]
Pam: It's *Ms. Kennedy*. And why can't you be *my* executive secretary?
James: We're south of the border. It's a man's world.

[last lines]
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Baby's dead, and no one's responsible.
D.A. Adam Schiff: No one was responsible when it was alive, either.
Jack: Warren Talbert's still in jail. We could get him for obstruction of justice, destruction of evidence.
D.A. Adam Schiff: [wearily] We got beat. Just send him home to his family.

Adam: One guilty plea. One guilty verdict. Good work, and good night.
Jack: [to Jamie] Join me in a drink?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [shakes head] There's going to be a lot of fallout from this. A lot of people are going to think twice before signing their donor cards.
Jack: [pours drink] Cosgrove was an aberration. I'm not worried about a shortage of organs.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Maybe you should be, especially livers. Goodnight, Jack.
[Jack does a double take at his drink]

Defense: This does not mean we're setting ourselves up as private investigators. Every lead that comes in, we forward to the police.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You're offering a $250,000 reward. Do you have any idea how many false leads that will attract?
Defense: If it attracts one good lead, my clients feel it's money very well spent.
Jack: It's a colossal waste of police time, Mr. Drake. I warned you about interfering with our investigation.
Defense: What investigation? Huh? I offered the police the services of a bona fide FBI manhunter, and what do they do? They dismiss his report, they ignore his recommendation, and they practically laugh in the man's face!
Jack: They were a lot kinder than I would've been. If I see any more of this nonsense from you, I'll have the ethics committee sanction you for professional misconduct.
Defense: Ah, I see-- You're gonna come after the Janaways' counselor while their daughter's murderer is running around loose in the street? I don't think that's going to look very good!
Jack: Not as bad as what you've been doing. Leaking evidence, publishing suspect profiles. It looks like your clients are trying to poison the jury pool. They're better suspects than ever.
Defense: How dare you say anything like that? You know something? You've got a lot of nerve. And let me tell you something. You take one baby step towards my clients and I'm coming after you for slander and malicious prosecution.
Jack: We prosecute who we see fit when we see fit. You better not get in the way.
Defense: I'm gonna run this ad from Monday through Sunday for two weeks, and every lead that comes in, I'm gonna forward to the police department, and I expect them to follow up on each one of them!
Jack: You don't dictate anything to us! You screw up this investigation, I'll see you get your license pulled! The Janaways will be your last clients in the state of New York!

Jamie: [about Wendy Singer's daughter] I'll save my pity for that baby, no matter where she ends up.

Neil: [to Ross] I don't know which I'm going to enjoy more: seeing Newman go free, or seeing you lose.
[to the barman]
Neil: Two vodka martinis.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Is it all about me?
Neil: You know I'm over that.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Of course! I've seen your new associate.
Neil: Harvard Law Review...
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: And a round butt, just the way you like them.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: It would help if we could tell the jury what turned Terry into an arsonist.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: He was angry at his father. That's an emotion I can understand.

Jack: Kills three people and hides behind the bottle.
Jamie: The law says he can.
Jack: The law. Probably written on a cocktail napkin. Intent follows the bullet. It shouldn't matter if it was fired by a drunk or Carrie Nation.

Pam: Look, I just saved your life back there! If it wasn't for me your ass would have been nailed to the wall.
James: You saved *my life*?
Pam: YES!
James: It's a tough business you picked, Miss Bouvier. Leave it to the professionals!
Pam: Look, pal, I was an *Army pilot*! I have flown to the toughest hell-holes in South America and I will *not* have you lecture *me* about PROFESSIONALISM!

Max: They think I killed Mike.
Leon: They do? You didn't, did you?
Max: No.
Leon: Well then just tell them the truth! I never saw anybody get hurt by the truth!
Lt. Anita Van Buren: [watching through the mirror] This man says he's an attorney?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Suspects are entitled to a lawyer, not a good lawyer.

Estelle: [referring to Jim Shepard] He's sitting in that hospital room, drinking milkshakes.
Lennie: [disguised as hitman] I can take care of that: no more frozen treats!
Estelle: But there's a policeman outside the door. That's why the other man wouldn't try again.
Lennie: Hey, you know how bored that cop's got to be by now? Won't be that hard to distract him.
Estelle: You're not afraid of policemen?
Lennie: They're underpaid, and, as a group, they're stupid.
Estelle: [admiringly] What are you going to do?
Lennie: [heard by Curtis and Ross eavesdropping over wire] I don't ask you your secrets, do I?
Detective: [amused] He has a way with mature women.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [chuckling] It's a gift, Detective!

Jack: I thought he was gonna ask your favorite sexual positions next.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: I grew up with four brothers. Marks is an amateur.
Jack: You don't mind that kind of thing?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Would you rather he ruled against us?
Jack: Guess I'll have to unlearn some of my sensitivity training. If we have another hearing, you'll model silk for him, again?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Trust me - he would have been just as big a fan of rayon.

Pam: [Pam picks up X Ray Camera and turns it on] Smile, boys.
Q: [X Ray Camera turns on and laser is pointed at painting and 007 and Q jump out of the way] DON'T USE THE FLASH!
Q: [X Ray Camera takes the photo but it shows their bones and that of the painting]
[Q takes the X Ray Camera away from Pam]
Q: Stop *fiddling* around with things you don't understand you might have easily killed him!
Pam: [Pam looks at photo] That's Odd...
[Q takes photo away from her]

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: It doesn't look like we're going to get a confession.
Adam: Why should he confess? You'll probably be arresting someone else tomorrow.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [leaving the courtroom after the verdict has been read] What do you think she was gonna say to him?
Jack: [confidently] "Thank you for ruining my life."
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [smiling knowingly] "Please take me back".
[McCoy's eyes widen in disbelief; fade to black]

Jack: So which devil do we make our deal with?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: The girl has motive. She is the one who didn't want the baby; killing it was probably her idea.
Jack: And the boy is probably the one who actually killed it and disposed of the body
D.A. Adam Schiff: Flipped a coin in my head, came up tails, talk to the boy.

Nari: I must be supervised with my own daughter?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Until we're all satisfied that she's safe with you, yes.

TV: But I think Jack McCoy definitely lost some points today.
TV: Jerry, it's part of his job to prepare his witnesses. I did it myself when I was a prosecutor.
TV: And I did it when I was a defense attorney, but come on, Ben, it looked like McCoy spoon-fed that guy his answers.
TV: Mr. McCoy didn't do anything wrong or even unusual. The defense just made it seem devious and sleazy.
TV: Yeah.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [switches TV off] Wasn't it great? Who needs a jury? We have commentators. Next time, try the cartoon channel.
Jack: That was the cartoon channel!

Jack: Jamie, do dead people feel pain?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Is that a trick question, Jack? The word 'dead' says it all.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [after asking lawyer to divulge a privileged secret] I'd definitely owe you one.
Gary: As a D.A., or the best-looking women to ever set foot in this office?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: As a D.A.
Gary: [pause] What's the question again?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Did Spence admit stealing evidence against Hector Garcia from the property room at the 116?
Gary: I'm gonna get up and open the door for you. If I don't fall and break my arm on the way over there, then you can assume my deceased client confessed to the crime in question.

IAB: [Opens locker] Booze... skin magazines... rubbers...
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Every day's a party for Detective Flynn.

ADA: I believe in monsters and things that go bump in the night, Jack. May they rot in hell, along with their attorneys.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Briscoe said the adults are so enlightened they make his teeth hurt.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [after the jury is hung and a mistrial is called] If he only knew. You could've sunk this trial and you didn't. You played it straight, Jack. That rates as a moral victory.
Jack: It could be a hollow one, if those clowns could find even one person who'd acquit them. What does that tell you about this country?

Judge: [after Ross arrives late in court] Ah - Miss Ross! How nice of you to join us... I gather you stayed later than 8 am this morning. Was the gentleman more... impressive today?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [taken aback] Your honor, I've been very busy.
Judge: What I'm suggesting.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: On a matter of business for this court.
Judge: Oh - and I thought our business was here. Whatever kind of romp you've been up to...
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: ...is relevant to this case, if you'd stop focusing on my sex life.
Judge: You're in contempt. I want a check for two hundred dollars.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [shouting] If you try to fine me...
Jack: [cutting her off] Not now... Approach, your honor?
Judge: If she brings her checkbook.
Jack: [quietly to Ross] ... Pretend he's your brother.

Jack: We already got the father.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [Referring to Arlene Webber] But she's guilty too.
Jack: We put her in jail, her son dies alone.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Everybody's got a sad story.
Jack: It won't be an easy case to make. Webber's dead. Her father won't talk.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: We can look for other evidence.
Jack: You feel burned?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You feel sorry for her?
Jack: Call me a sentimental fool.
[long pause]
Jack: There's no statute of limitations on murder.
[picks up file on the case]
Jack: We'll keep it. Right on top of the pile.
[cut to closing credits]

Jamie: Racial make-up, my ass. Archer's afraid a black woman would vote to convict.
Jack: What makes you so sure she would? I'm telling the judge we'll go along with Archer's proposal. I don't like being manipulated by phony letters.
Jamie: You like losing better? We don't know for a fact the letter's bogus. Seating a black woman would get us closer to a hung jury.
Jack: And to prosecutorial misconduct. I don't want to do it.
Jamie: You heard Danielle's father. That's who wins here. A bunch of bigots because your ethics might get ruffled.
Jack: You took the same oath I did.

Judge: [commenting on Ross's clothing] Lovely blouse. Rare to see single-ply silk with that texture. Must feel very nice. Italian weave.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: ...Chinese.
Judge: Ah! They're improving.

Mr. Tobak: [sees his car being towed] What is this?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Mr. Tobak, did you know that you owe $36,000 in parking fees?
Mr. Tobak: You have heard of diplomatic immunity?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You have it. Your car doesn't. We can have it towed, and towed... and towed.
D.A. Adam Schiff: [cuts to] You make one heck of a meter maid, Jamie.

Jamie: Lanie Stieglitz filed her appeal.
Adam: She's hoping they'll erect a statue for her on 12th Avenue.
Jack: Even prostitutes deserve a patron saint.
Jamie: It makes me wonder if they convicted her because we made our case or because she's a prostitute.
Jack: They convicted her. I don't care why.

D.A. Adam Schiff: Hold your heads up. You looked a 3000 year old abomination in the eye and hit it back.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: Because we heard of it.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: How many more don't we know about?

Dr. Emil Skoda: [discussing the alleged rape of a mentally handicapped teenager] She's a sweet girl with an IQ of 65. And the school thinks exposing her to ridicule from normal kids somehow does her good.
Jack: She understand what she did?
Dr. Emil Skoda: Not in any meaningful way. She'd do whatever it takes to please whoever she was with.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Would that be obvious to another teenager?
Dr. Emil Skoda: That'd be crystal clear to anyone who talked to her for two minutes.
Jack: Those boys are gonna claim the last thing they did in that music room was talk.

Jack: [turning off a news report about the murder] These anonymous sources, the wouldn't be wearing blue, would they?
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Those leaks did not come out of my squad.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: They got the M.E.'s report before we did.
Jack: I want these leaks stopped, Lieutenant.
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Do you want me to compile an enemies list while I'm at it?
Jack: I don't see anything funny here.
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Well, a case this big, we're going to get leaks. We might as well get used to it.
Jack: No, that's not good enough. By the time we present this case to a jury, the details will be clues in the Daily News Sunday crossword.
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Which could be the whole point of leaking the information in the first place. The Janaways know people who know people in the department.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: The Janaways are the anonymous source?
Lt. Anita Van Buren: Why not? If they got a heads-up that this investigation's about to turn back on them, these leaks could just be preemptive.
Jack: Have your people talked to Mrs. Janaway about her husband and her daughter?
Lt. Anita Van Buren: They're going to try today.
Jack: Good. This time, let's try to stay one step ahead of the media.

Judge: Bail's set at a million dollars.
Defense: [to Jamie] A million bucks? He must like the cut of your skirt.
Jamie: From what I hear, he'd prefer yours.

Kim: We could both get jobs, Mama.
Velma: You wanna dance naked in Wichita Falls? You want me to dance naked too? The Dancin' Naked Idiot Family?
Jamie: [listening in a van] These family talks are SO heartwarming.
Detective: Yeah, I just hope nobody throws the vase with the microphone in it.

[Pam saves Bond from Dario, who is then violently decimated in a crushing machine]
Pam: Are you all right?
James: SWITCH THE BLOODY MACHINE OFF!

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Who would you ask if you needed a hitman?
Detective: [jokingly referring to Briscoe] I'd find an old cop, preferably one with a lot of alimony.

Jack: We screwed up, we're not supposed to screw up.
Jamie: You act like this is the first case you lost.
Jack: It's not, doesn't mean I have to like it. A murderer goes unpunished, it's bad for business.
Jamie: Laura Bergreen's not the first rich person to get away with murder... and she won't be the last.

Jack: [to Ross] You know Gorton better than anyone.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Jack...
Jack: He's doing everything you loathe to win and he's getting away with it because he scammed you.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Almost a record! They convicted him in an hour and a half.
D.A. Adam Schiff: How's the wife doing?
Jack: Shaky, but she served him with divorce papers on his way out of the courtroom.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Gotta be tough finding out you married your stalker.

James: Miss Kennedy would you get me a medium-dry Vodka Martini?
Pam: Why don't you ask...
James: Shaken! Not stirred.

[their boat just died]
Pam: Out of Gas. I haven't heard that one in a long time.
James: Well, they must have hit the fuel line.

Jack: [discussing media coverage of the case, in Schiff's office] How things look to some general audience is not relevant in the courtroom.
Adam: Oh, will you wake him up, Miss Ross? We're approaching the 21st century. It matters, Jack! When are you going to buy a new tie?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [cut to Ross and McCoy approaching the courthouse] You can't just turn off all the cameras and the microphones.
Jack: What's next? Timeouts for commercials? We go into court with soft drink logos on our backs?

Neil: Nice coat!
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Thanks! You paid for it!

Jack: It's outrageous. Jamie won't play footsie with him; new facts disrupt his perfect trial. So he takes it out on us.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Right. Had nothing to do with the fact that all this time, you didn't know what you were talking about.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Dismissal of the charge was excessive.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Right. You know who's who now?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Yes.
D.A. Adam Schiff: This is *Joanne* Sullivan you got there in Rikers?
Jack: Who else could it be?
D.A. Adam Schiff: Please don't ask.

Dario: La Senorita Bouvier, don't I know you from somewhere?
Pam: No.
Dario: Oh, yes I do. You used to fly charter planes for some friends of mine. I got a job for you.
[Dario grabs her arm]
Dario: Why don't we go outside and we talk in private.
James: Take your hands off her! She's with me.
Dario: Nobody's asking you gringo.
Pam: [she has a shotgun aimed at his groin] He's with *me*! Keep your hands on the table!

Pam: [Mocking Lupe Lamora] "I love James so much."
[Normal voice]
Pam: I'll be damned if I help him!
Q: Look, don't judge him too harshly, my dear. Field operatives must often use every means at their disposal to achieve their objectives.
Pam: Bullshit!

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [at arraignment] This is a case of attempted murder for hire, Your Honor. Defendant Muller hired defendant Philips, a professional hit man...
Arraignment: Professional, eh? Well, Mrs. Muller can use her refund to post bond!

Jamie: Killers are protected by the church, the law says two people can fire the same bullet and now the victim's mom forgives the murderer. You figure it out.
Jack: You don't think you could?
Jamie: Forgive him? No.
Jack: Neither could I. What does that say about us?

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Mr. Chandler.
Eddie: Eddie, as in Eddie Munster.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: You don't seem to be taking this serious at all.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [referring to Carl Anderton] Last year he made a surprise takeover bid for Commonwealth Airlines. One week later, he withdrew the bid, and accused the FAA and the stockholders of conspiring against him. It's classic manic-depressive behavior.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Doesn't make sense. Runs a Fortune 500 company.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: So did Howard Hughes.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: We have the facts. I think we'll convince Judge Marks.
Jack: Nathan Marks?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Luck of the draw.
D.A. Adam Schiff: Make sure your airbags are working.

Jack: I'm sorry that it had to be this way.
Jamie: Not *that* sorry.

[a fork lift truck bursts through a wall with a Heller impaled on the forks]
Pam: Oh, God, it's Heller.
James: Yeah. Looks like he came to a dead end.
[explosions are heard]
James: Come on!

Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: Adam, why are we pussyfooting around?
D.A. Adam Schiff: [referring to Anderton] The man has a 4 billion dollar war chest. Three years ago, the Atlantic Star Cable merger, he took on the SEC and won.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [sarcastically] He's rich; he's powerful; maybe we should let Robin Leach try the case?

Detective: [to McCoy] I hear some judge threw out the tape.
Jack: We're waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Detective: Which is?
Jamie: Motion to dismiss which we're going to lose.
Detective: The tape's out 'cause she lied about the first attack?
Jack: Yes.
Detective: I don't think she lied. I think the guy pushed her down the stairs.
Jamie: Did it occur to you to mention this sooner?
Detective: I didn't know there was going to be a problem.
Jamie: Do you have anything besides an opinion based on hindsight?
Detective: Twenty-eight years experience.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Grant's lawyer wants to meet as soon as possible. He might be looking for a plea.
Detective: Oh, that's too bad. I was hoping this time Grant might escape to the Bahamas.

Judge: Miss Ross, when you leave a man's apartment at 8 o'clock in the morning, did you just drop in for a coffee and a sweet roll?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Am I a defense witness, judge?
Judge: You're an officer of the court, aiding in the search for the truth. You sample a man's hospitality once. Are you likely to return to sample it again soon?
Jack: Your honor, this is not appropriate.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: If I left at 8 am... I wasn't too impressed. I don't think I'd be rushing back.
Judge: Can't argue with that.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [after McCoy has made a deal with Silverman] All this time I thought it was defense attorneys who were sleazy.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Turns out Sonja Harlann was Lancer's kid. She gets her 50 million dollars.
Jack: [sheepishly] Good for her.
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: And Silverman collects his 17 million dollar fee. No wonder everybody hates the legal profession.
Jack: [pause] Make sure Douglas Burke gets a full transcript of Sonja Harland's allocution. This way there'll be something to collect when he sues her and Mr Silverman for his mother's wrongful death.
D.A. Adam Schiff: [wryly] Lawyers!
[sighs]
D.A. Adam Schiff: [fade to closing titles]

James: [Pam kisses Bond] Why don't you wait until you're asked?
Pam: Why don't you ask me?
[kisses Bond again]

Jamie: [to McCoy] Follow the logic of your position. If you're for the death penalty, you're for the death penalty even if the condemned murderer is cute and cuddly.

Chief: The district attorney brought this matter to me with some reluctance.
Judge: Well-deserved. I'm trying to run a trial; I don't have time to...
Chief: Make some. I'm taking this seriously.
Judge: Because a young woman can't take a joke?
A.D.A. Jamie Ross: I'm not pressing any charge.
Chief: She could! You should thank her.
Judge: Fine; thanks. Goodbye.
Chief: I'm more concerned about the general tenor of this trial.
Judge: You know how I run a trial, George.
Chief: Yes - expeditiously. And usually, fairly.
Judge: *Always* fairly.
Jack: You've been hostile to the people. Demeaning to their representatives, interfering with their witnesses...
Judge: You expect me to sit there like a lump, while he springs surprise witnesses? Half-baked appeals, revised indictments? To turn my courtroom inside out - to win a case he should have lost the first time!
Chief: Nathan - you're not supposed to care who wins, remember?
D.A. Adam Schiff: ...Your honor, I'd like to request...
Chief: No need. Nathan, you just caught a bad case of the flu, and are unable to continue presiding over this trial. I'm assigning Judge Bryant.
Judge: George...
Chief: Would you rather be sick? Or be facing the commission on judicial conduct?

E.A.D.A. Jack McCoy: [discussing a potential plea bargain] The offer won't hold forever. Once it's gone, you know better than anybody I'll do everything I can to strap Gordon to a gurney.
Defense: I know what "everything I can" means.
E.A.D.A. Jack McCoy: Then you can impress on your client that he's dealing with a junkyard dog.

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: Your grandson needs psychiatric help.
Carl: Absolutely not.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: I don't understand you, Mr. Anderton. We're offering him...
Carl: What? The chance to stay in a loony bin till some state employee decides he can leave?
[pause]
Carl: You know, I know what this is really all about, Mr McCoy.
[pause]
Carl: You're going after my grandson to embarrass me.
[McCoy shakes his head]
Carl: Yes! Personally, professionally, publicly.
[Walks right up to McCoy]
Carl: I know your type. You think that to bring down a man who's accomplished something in life it builds you up. You're not going to get away with it. I put a fair offer on the table. You turn it down, I'll go public and I'll expose you for the vindictive, envious little man you really are.
[McCoy stares at Anderton in astonishment]

A.D.A. Jamie Ross: [Dr. Nasser lied about being a cardiologist] Mr. Tobak finally came through. Dr. Nasser's résumé. Turns out he's an OB/GYN.
Executive A.D.A. Jack McCoy: That's a few organs south of cardiology.

Jack: Harding raped a comatose woman for profit. I won't make a deal with him.
Jamie: How about the mother? She sold her own daughter to a stranger.
Jack: She acted out of despair. Harding acted out of greed.
Jamie: Harding was just fulfilling the mother's wishes. Instead of protecting her daughter, she turned her into a baby machine.

Jamie: I ordered a desk for Katie from Homebody last year. I gave my name, address, phone and credit card numbers to a convict?