50 Best Hughie Campbell Quotes

Hughie: Just 'cause you fall on your ass doesn't mean you have to stay there.

Hughie: I'm completely sterile. Doctor says my sperm are bad. Like, really, really bad, like a bunch of fat, dead tadpoles.

Hughie: Butcher, can I uh...
[Butcher breathing heavily]
Hughie: What are you doing?
Billy: Contingency. In case things go ass over tit at the lab.
[Hughie starts closing the door]
Hughie: I want to try some.
Billy: [looks at Hughie] Don't be daft. This shit is poison, Hughie. A lad like you don't want no part of it.
Hughie: What, you mean like a loser? A fuckup?
Billy: Sooner or later, Homelander will find Ryan. Okay? It's just a matter of time. I have to do this, all right? You don't.
Hughie: Annie's in just as much danger. Homelander almost lasered me in half in front of her, and it was like... it was like I was back with every bully that I ever had, just taking it. And then she had to SAVE me AGAIN.
[Butcher puts on his vest, Hughie was suspicious]
Hughie: Butcher, please. Please. Please. Because right now, I am so angry that I can't even BREATH.
[Hughie exhales]
Billy: It's shittier. It's not power. It's punishment. You don't deserve none of it.
[he walks out and opens the door]
Hughie: What, and you do?
Billy: Get ready to go.
[he starts closing the door]

Hughie: Who is the contact? What is their actual name?
Billy: You'll love it.
Hughie: No, I won't. I won't love it, I never love it. Never fucking love it!

Hughie: You're a fed? You don't sound like a fed.
Billy: What, I can't immigrate? There's a giant green slapper with her ass in the harbor that says different.
Hughie: You don't really look like one, either.
Billy: No? What do I look like?
Hughie: Like you're starring in the porn version of The Matrix.

Hughie: Literally every neuron in your brain is screaming "I told you so," so why don't you just say it before your head explodes.
Starlight: Oh, my God! I fucking told you so.
Hughie: Feel good to get that out?
Starlight: So satisfying.

A: All right, where is it?
Hughie: You know... this shit must be pretty good if it's worth running through a human being for.
A: Oh my God, that was an accident, man. Where the fuck is the V?
Hughie: That accident had a name.
A: And what about Popclaw? She had a name, too! Charlotte! The only good thing in my life is gone now. What is this, man? I kill your girlfriend and you kill mine?
Hughie: [confused] I didn't kill your girlfriend.
A: You used her! You put her in danger and then you threw her out like she was fucking garbage! How does this not all start with you, Hughie? The only difference between you and me is that I made a mistake. The shit that you did was on purpose! So who's worse?

A: My deepest condolences to Robin's family. She just stepped in the middle of the street
Hughie: She was a half step off the fucking curb!

Hughie: The point is, I can be that person that no one thinks is awesome, but it turns out they're kind of fucking awesome.

Hughie: Hey, Maeve. Good to see you again. Glad you're okay.
Queen: It's like you wear a neon sign that says, "Raw dog me, I'm a bottom."

Hughie: I'm not a murderer.
Billy: That's all right. I am.

Billy: What the fuck are you waiting for?
Hughie: My second wind.

Hughie: You know, I managed to go my whole life without seeing someone die horribly, and now I'm up to about a half dozen, so I think I'm good.

Mother's: This kid needs to be trained up, Butcher.
Hughie: Yeah. Yeah, what he said. I-I don't know how to blackmail anyone.
Billy: Hughie, you've done a murder. Comparatively speaking, this will be a piece of cake.

Billy: Now, there's fuck-all security to worry about. In fact, they're a bunch of Muppets. And the metal detector won't pick this up, right? And what they'll probably do is take you through the security and then up into the boardroom. Sit down, be nice, congenial. Then, real polite-like, tell 'em you're gonna take a fake shit. Go into the bog, take the bug out, peel back the plastic bit to reveal the sticky side. Put the plastic bit in the bog, flush it. Then go back into the boardroom, sit down - big smiles - plant the bug underneath the table. Easy-peasy, Japanesey. Bob's your uncle. That's that.
Hughie: That's that?
Billy: Yeah.
Hughie: That was... that was a lot. Th-I've... Hold on, can you just... can you repeat it again?

Hughie: Just cause you fall on your ass doesn't mean you have to stay there.

Starlight: Hey. Get some sleep.
Hughie: I'll sleep when I know you're safe.

Hughie: You came.
Starlight: Like you said, I'm a fucking superhero.

Mother's: Who's this guy?
Billy: The new lad. Hughie. Hughie, Mother's Milk.
Hughie: That's a... nickname?
Mother's: No, my mother actually named me Mother's Milk.
Hughie: Did-did she?
Mother's: So we got a French whore and a Stephen fucking Hawking. Great job, Butcher.
Billy: Well, it was Stephen fucking Hawking who dusted the Supe.

Hughie: This isn't healthy, man. You can't watch porn while the sun's out.

[last lines]
Victoria: Hugh Campbell. I don't know how to repay you for what you did.
Hughie: You know, I can think of a way.
Victoria: Oh?
Hughie: You can... give me a job.
Victoria: You serious? Uh, what about your team?
Hughie: Don't get me wrong, I-I-I still want to fight Vought, I just... I want to do it the right way. Not covered in quite as many guts. Look, the truth is, I never totally fit in with the guys. And... I think it's time I stand on my own two feet.
Victoria: They know you're here?
Hughie: I haven't told them yet.
Victoria: When can you start?

Soldier: I read up that we were ass up in Afghanistan. The fuck is up with that? Those were the good guys.
Hughie: Yeah, you know...
Soldier: I mean, when I left, it was uh... I mean, goddamn it. We-we were ten and one, you know? I lead the 116th onto Omaha Beach. I was in the fucking Eagles Nest. I fought for this country. I fought for this country. And what did I get for it? Forgotten. Left to rot by my own team.

Hughie: Okay, let's go fuck the wife. Consensually.

Starlight: So we risked our lives just to make the world way worse.
Hughie: No. No, no, Annie. These things just take time.
Starlight: How much time?

Soldier: How hard did Butcher suck your dick that you miss him that much? Hmm? His mouth must feel like a Hoover Deluxe.
Hughie: God, every single thing you say is so gross.

Soldier: Do men really walk around like that?
Hughie: Yeah. I mean, dads do.
Soldier: Okay, well... Bill Cosby is America's dad, and, I tell you one thing, he wouldn't be caught dead in that pussy gear.
Hughie: Lot to unpack there. Uh...
Soldier: The Cos. That's a real man. Holy shit, did he make some strong drinks.
Hughie: [whispers] Holy fucking shit.
Soldier: But, seriously, what passes as a man today? Christ on a cross.

Hughie: So what they do is they take boxes full of that stuff and they ship it to hospitals all across the country. And apparently the latest one is going to the NICU at Mercer Hospital. It's in... it's midtown I think.
Mother's: You are a natural, kid. You're like the fucking... Rain Man of fucking people over.
Hughie: [Chuckles] Not a compliment.

Queen: This is the guy?
Hughie: Hi. Hughie.
Queen: He's even more of a twink then in the photo.

Hughie: Wait, wait, d-d-do the others know?
Billy: No, they do not. And if they find out, I'll put you in a fucking coma.

Hughie: Oh, okay. So, this-this is an actual orgy. That's what this is.
Billy: Fucking Herogasm. Still a thing, eh?
Soldier: It's my thing. I founded it in '52. Me and this other Supe, Liberty. Man, was she a firecracker.
Billy: Frenchie's gonna be real heartbroken he missed this.

Hughie: You might want to lay off the weed, huh?
Soldier: And you might want to gargle my ball sack.

Hughie: [leaving a message for Annie] Hey, uh, Annie, it's me again. I was just wondering, have you ever seen the music video for that Billy Joel song "You're Only Human"? There's this kid and he's climbing up a bridge and he's-he's gonna kill himself, but then Billy Joel steps out with his harmonica and tells him stop, you just have to wait for your second wind, and now I-I feel like I'm-I'm that kid and I'm gonna drown, and... and thank God I found my second wind because it's-it's you. You're my second wind. Um, look, I know it's exciting, uh, taking down Vought and being like James Bond and everything, but you've got to be careful, because that stuff can go to shit really quick... and you wind up hurting the people that... you love. Like the way that I hurt you. Um... Anyhoo... that's all I wanted to say. Second wind. Um, okay, thanks. Bye.

Ivy: So a Tri-Delt from Wesleyan caught a Supe masturbating outside her window.
Hughie: Okay, how's she know it's a Supe?
Ivy: Window was on a 737.
Hughie: That's a Supe.

[while locked in a cell]
Mother's: Did they get Butcher too?
Hughie: No.
Frenchie: They had you separated? When? When?
Hughie: Well, um... he went after Homelander. But I-I came to save you. Yay.
Mother's: So, you came here. You meant to come here. Without Butcher.
Hughie: Yeah.
Frenchie: [genuinely impressed] C'est incroyable.
[he grabs Hughie and kisses him on both cheeks]
Frenchie: Never has a man thrown his life away so... completely like you've thrown yours away today. No. No, I mean, *you* rescuing *us* is the most useless, futile gesture I can think of!
Hughie: Yeah, I-I got it.
Frenchie: Unbelievable!

Hughie: Asshole.
Mother's: Yep.

Hughie: Yeah. So, uh, you gonna stay over again tonight?
Starlight: Don't know. It depends. Um, you gonna bring Aquafresh?
Hughie: I would brush with Monistat if it meant I could have sex with you. Yes.

Starlight: This is where you're living?
Hughie: Yeah, it has its charms. The rats are like Pokemon. With Hep C.

- Jesus Christ, Billy.
- M.M., you all right?
- I'm okay.
Hughie: Do you really have those pictures?
- Of course I do.

Hughie: So you don't have shit. Welcome to the fucking club.

Hughie: As a rule, I don't usually go out after a gory massacre.

Hughie: You want the Valtrex before or after?
Victoria: You want the Valtrex before or after?
Hughie: I could have herpes. You don't think I could have herpes?

Hughie: We tell Butcher I've been a Supe's sidekick for a year? Oh, Christ, he's never gonna not torture me for this, is he?

Robin: Hi. I'd like to make an appointment for you to come over and lay some cable.
Hughie: Okay. Uh... oh, Robin. Oh, dear, dear, Robin. Um, that doesn't mean what you think it means.
Robin: Um, "laying cable" means sex.
Hughie: No, "laying pipe" means sex. "Laying cable" means you want me to come over your house and just take a big, old shit.

Frenchie: [Has a pill] Here take it.
Hughie: What is that?
Frenchie: It will help you with your, uh, anxiety. It's LSD and MDMA. This is a candy flip. It'll smooth you right out. Take it.
Hughie: Uh, thank you, but I-I don't think now is the time for a major hallucinogen.

Hughie: Is he... is he dead? Is he...
Billy: Well, he ain't movin'.
Hughie: Oh, fuck. Oh, shit.
Billy: How'd you know the electric could do the job?
Hughie: Skin's carbon. Highly conductive. Saw it on, uh, Jimmy Fallon.
Billy: That would've taken me forever to work that one out. Good job. Let's get him in the boot.
Hughie: Wait, what? Wait, what? What?
Billy: The trunk.
Hughie: No, I mean, what are we... what are we doing with him?
Billy: Well, Hughie, you just offed one of the Seven, mate.
Hughie: Me? I... you-you hit him with a fucking car!
Billy: Look, potato, fuckin' po-tah-to. We're both in a shitload of trouble.
Hughie: No, no, no, we're not! It's... it... he-he attacked us, okay? And you're-you're a federal officer, you know? Just-just call the fucking FBI.
Billy: Yeah, o-okay, so, look, technically, I'm not a fed.
Hughie: WHAT? Then who the fuck are you?

Hughie: If Soldier Boy goes through with this, thousands will die. Help us stop him.
Billy: This ain't a bloody kinder care we're on about, son. It's Vought fucking Tower.
Frenchie: Becca worked in the Tower.
Billy: You shut your fucking cake hole, Frenchie.
Frenchie: No. No! No, my cake hole will remain open! You will never command me again. I am done with your cruelty! I deserve respect! And we all deserve paid vacation days, and a dental plan!

Hughie: What are we, uh... what are we doing here?
Billy: Well, you got to go to work, don't you?
Hughie: Yeah, but, um, I don't, uh...
Billy: Well, I mean, that's all I need you for right now, yeah?
Hughie: Yeah, I mean, but, I-I can... I can help with other stuff, you know? I could... I could be, like, your tech guy. You know? Like, I could be in the van with the thing and, like, you know, "He's down the hall to the left." Like, I can...
Billy: Yeah, look, son, I, uh... I think it's best that I take it from here. You know what I mean?
Hughie: Yeah, but I can... I can really help.
Billy: I know you can help. I got it.
Hughie: [getting out of the car] Oh, w... oh, hey, wait. You ever see an asshole tear up $45k?
Billy: [he rips the check in half] Hughie. You're a good lad.

Hughie: No witnesses, but we definitely found fuck-all. I'm not sure I'm using that term properly.

Hughie: I used to have this girl, and we used to go skating at Rockefeller and I'd be on the side with this death grip on the rails. She would just charge head first into the middle of the rink... and she wasn't 'good', like she fell *a lot*, but she was never scared. And she always used to say, "Just 'cause you fall on your ass doesn't mean you have to stay there". So you fell on your ass. You... that's not who you are. So, who are you?

Hughie: Just... hold on a second. I want to show you something.
[Hughie takes out his phone, only to discover it's badly water-damaged and no longer functional]
Ezekiel: What's wrong?
Hughie: Uh...
[looks up]
Hughie: You fucked me.
Ezekiel: What?
Hughie: Yeah, in a private Supe club. You know, the one on East 29th? Secret Lair, I think it's called?
Ezekiel: [backs away nervously] Don't know it. Nope.
Hughie: There were three of us...
Ezekiel: You've got nothing.
Hughie: ...oiled up, and you... wrapped your stretchy arms around me and it was... it was so fucking hot. And your dick was so... perfect, and long, and stretchy. And you... you played my butt like jazz. With poise and skill and... willingness to improvise.