The Best John Wilkes Booth Quotes

[Danny tells his brothers the incident with President Lincoln]
Danny: Mr. President, say, I'm gonna go hit the little boy's room.
Abraham: Are you shitting me?
Danny: Come on, you'll be fine superstar. Can I get you something on the way back? Agua? Brewski?
Abraham: No.
Danny: Alright. Fair enough, I'll be back in two.
John: [running into one another in the hall] Where's the president's box?
Danny: John Wilkes Booth, the actor?
John: Yeah.
Danny: No way, man! Big fan! You wanna say hi to the president? He'd get a real kick out of that. Last door on the left.
John: Thank you!
Danny: Really cool. Wow, love that guy!
Danny: [Danny is pooping when he hears a gunshot fired and women screaming] Abe!