The Best Meteor Bert Quotes

Meteor: Well, it ain't a meteor.
Joe: Yeah, it is. It came out of the sky.
Meteor: Well I'm sure it did but it ain't no meteor. It's a big ol' frozen chunk o' shit.
Joe: What?
Meteor: Oh yeah, see them airplanes they dump their toilets 36,000 feet. The stuff freezes and falls to earth. We call 'em Boeing bombs.
[chomps teeth]
Joe: No, that can't be. That's not what it is.
Meteor: Oh, afraid so. See that peanut? Dead giveaway.
Joe: Uhhh, no, that's a space peanut.
Meteor: No, afraid not. That just a big ol' frozen chunk of poopy.
Studio manager: Dude, you were eating off it!