The Best Owen Quotes

Bill: Some little snacks for everybody. Oh, you don't have to eat the sour worms. Those are for Owen.
Colleen: I'll go get him in a second. By the way, you should know we haven't told him he's adopted yet.
Chandler: But kids are so intuitive. Don't you think on some level he already knows?
[Owen comes running in]
Owen: I'm adopted?
Chandler: See? Intuitive!
Bill: What? Where did you hear that?
Owen: [points at Chandler] He told me! And he paid me 50 dollars not to tell.
Chandler: Which technically now you should give back!
Colleen: You told him he's adopted?
Chandler: I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or something. Or at least whisper it to people when they come in the door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa is real."
Owen: He isn't?
Chandler: [to Monica] We have to get out of here, baby!

Chandler: Hey, you must be Owen.
Owen: Yeah.
Chandler: I'm Chandler. Hey, I was in the scouts too.
Owen: You were?
Chandler: Yeah, in fact my father was a den-mother.
Owen: Huh?
Chandler: [changing the subject] You know how to use a compass?
Owen: I have a badge in it.
Chandler: You do? That's fantastic!
Owen: You wanna see it?
Chandler: I'd love to, but I gotta get back to talking to your parents. They're telling us all about how they adopted you.
Owen: What?
Chandler: What?