The Best Alien #1 Quotes

Alien: Wait please, we mean you no harm. We travel to your planet to find an evil little girl. We must destroy her before seven days.
George: You mean... You watched the video tape?
Alien: Our satellite caught up what we thought was Pootie Tang, that was a week ago. And now our entire race will die, unless the girl is destroyed.
Tom: Aw, you see, they are peaceful.
Mahalik: If they so peaceful, man, why were they choking us a few minutes ago?
Alien: Oh... that's how we say hello.
George: Well how do you guys say goodbye?
[an alien kicks George in the groin]
George: [in pain] I had to ask.