Top 20 Quotes From Regina Hall

Brenda: Cindy, this is a skeleton, this is bones! Would you run from Callista Flockheart?

Rick: Now I'm never gonna know the secret to becoming a superhero.
Mrs. Xavier: You wanna know the secret? Come close.
[smacks Rick]
Mrs. Xavier: Make a costume, shithead!

Ray: [dressing Brenda up in football clothes] Get your little sexy ass over here...
[Brenda jumps in to the bed]
Ray: Take it Brendan, take it Brendan...
Brenda: Who?
Ray: Uhh... Brenda!

Brenda: [the TV is acting weird and turns on after Brenda turns it off. Finally she unplugs and when it turns on again, it shows a creepy black and white image of Tabitha getting out of a well] Oh, come on. Cindy, the news is on! Another little white girl done fell down a well. Fifty black people got they ass beat by police today, but the whole world gotta stop for one little whitey down the hole.
[the TV starts leaking]
Brenda: Cindy, the TV's leaking. Cindy... Cindy something's wrong here.
[Tabitha comes out slowly as Brenda backs away. Tabitha empties her ears with water]
Brenda: Cindy, this bitch is messin' up my floor!
[Tabitha creeps slowly for Brenda]
Brenda: Cindy, Help me!
Cindy: [Cindy is busy in the kitchen and is refusing to believe Brenda after she tricked her so many times] I'm not listening.
Brenda: [Tabitha gets closer to Brenda when Brenda punches her down] Get up you little ugly bitch. C'mon, let me see what you got. What you gonna do?
[Tabitha gets up and starts swinging at Brenda while Brenda holds her back by her hair]
Brenda: That's all?
[Grabs Tabitha and punches her down]
Brenda: Oooh, I'm whippin' her ass, Cindy! Yeah, wassup?

Cindy: I'm looking for something more than just good sex.
Brenda: I know. You want commitment.
Cindy: No, I want great sex.

Buffy: Hey do you think the press is gonna wanna talk to us?
Brenda: Oh please. The press only wanna interview the most ignorant person they find.
Shorty: [Cut to Gail Haistorm interviewing Shorty about Drew Decker's death]
Shorty: I'm on T.V. Oh shit, first "Cops" now this. I'm gonna be a star, son.
Gail: So how close were you to the victim?
Shorty: Oh real close. Right 'til the roofies wore and she woke up. Then she was all talkin' 'bout pressing charges so I just pulled my tongue outta her ass and left.
Gail: If you could have spoken to her before she died what would your last words to her have been?
Shorty: Run bitch, run!

Brenda: [after sleeping with Zoltar] What? We at peace now, I was just sealing the deal.

Cindy: You know, you really are my best friend, Cindy.
Cindy: Thanks, Brenda.
Buddy: Hey are you guys okay?
Brenda: Hell, yeah. It's gonna take more than a bag of bones to scare me.
Hell: Wedgie!
Cindy: Oh my God! Brenda, do something!
Brenda: Okay!
Hell: [Brenda runs away]
Cindy: I thought I was your best friend?
Brenda: Was. I'ma miss you, girl!

Brenda: [Sucking the sauce off her fingers and screaming at the screen] Uh-uh! Uh-uh! Uh-uh! Don't go in there!
[screams, scaring everyone in the theater]
Brenda: Woah-ho-ho-ho! Lord! I'mma have a heart attack! Oh, this is some scury shit! Hah! Oh I am scared! Oh-ho-ho!
Old: [annoyed] Excuse me?
Brenda: Uh ha... I think I paid my money like er'ybody else up in here!
[Watching the movie]
Brenda: That ain't no man! You can see her real hair right there!
Young: [turning around] Do you mind?
Brenda: [sticking out her hand to the women's face] I know you better get outta my face! Outta my face! Outta my face! This is all me up in here! You handle 'dat!
Young: [shouting] Will you shut the fuck up!
Brenda: [takes out a camera] Um-umm! This movie is good!
[the Killer sits next to her, but she thinks it's Ray]
Brenda: Hey baby, you back just in tiiiime! She's about to get in on with Shake-a-speare! He found out she's a girl.
Young: Shut UP!
Brenda: [turns around with the camera pointing at the young man behind her] Yeah I got you! I got you on camera! You on candid camera now! You ain't know 'dat!
Brenda: [her cell phones rings and everyone groans as they know what is going to happen] Hello? Hey girl! Ah, I'm in the movies! Uh-huh, yeah Shake-a-speare in love! Ohh-ohh! You lying! You lying!
Young: For Christ's sake, will you just shut your trap!
Young: Shut up!
Brenda: [to her friend on the phone] Hold on...
[to the audience of the movie theater]
Brenda: I don't know why ya'll is acting like this! My girlfriend already saw the movie and she says they don't even stay together in the end!

Brenda: [after greeting Cindy] Cindy! Oh, it's been so long.
Cindy: Brenda, I thought you were dead.
Brenda: Oh, I thought you were dead, too!

Brenda: [having a nightmare] Lil' Kim- Lil' Kim got my sandwich. Look out- Russell Crowe's got a phone! R.Kelly, don't pee on me! MY LOVELY LADY LUMPS! Where are we?
Cindy: I'm not sure, but I think were close. It's supposed to be near mile 62.
Brenda: Is something wrong?
Cindy: No, it's just... I met this guy, and I wonder if he's safe. Oh, you'd love him, Brenda.
Brenda: What's his name? I might've already loved him.
Cindy: Tom Ryan.
Brenda: Yeah, did him. Big, fat Chinese guy?
Cindy: No... No.
Cindy: [relieved] But he is the kind of guy I'd like to share the rest of my life with.

Cindy: [before pushing a dead fisherman in the water] Don't you think we should check his wallet first?
Buffy: For what?
Brenda: Shit, he might have some money.
Brenda: Well, we already committed murder, we might as well rob his ass.

George: So, I'll be doing the rap battle at the 23 Club tomorrow night.
Brenda: Oh, I don't believe this shit.
George: Word! You two should come down! I'll be rappin', I'll be cappin', I'll be tappin', I'll be flappin', I'll be happen... ing. Ding, bing, wing. Yo!
Cindy: Sounds good!
George: Would, could, should, 'hood.
Brenda: Ugh!
George: Gug, mug, dug, bug.

Dwight: Let's split up.
Brenda: Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh UH! Now wait a minute, hold up! How come when anytime this scary shit happens, and we should stick together, you white people always say "let's split up"?
Theo: She's right, we should stick together.
Dwight: She's right. Okay.
[pointing to Cindy, Buddy and Theo]
Dwight: You three, follow me!
[Brenda, Shorty and Ray are left alone]
Shorty: Ain't that a bitch.
[the three of them begin to cry]
Brenda: We gonna die, y'all.

Brenda: This is some shit, up with which we will not put.

Professor: But pumpkin, I don't see nobody.
Mrs. Xavier: Don't call me pumpkin. It ain't Halloween.

Cindy: Oh, my god, Brenda we're gonna die.
Brenda: IT WOULD HAVE JUST BEEN YOU IF YOU HAD JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Brenda: I saw this tape, and I think you should know about it. It had these really shocking images on it.
Cindy: Brenda, it was Mardi Gras, I never drank Vodka before, and I was outta beads!
Brenda: No, not that tape Cindy. Anyway, you watch the tape, and when it's over, your phone rings. And this creepy voice says, "You're Gonna Die In Seven Days", and seven days later...
Cindy: When did you watch it?
Brenda: A week ago. A week ago, tonight.
Cindy: [Brenda's nose is bleeding] Brenda!
[Cindy hands her tampon,and Brenda starts choking, but then starts laughing]
Cindy: .
Cindy: Oh my God, you bitch!
Brenda: [about the fake blood] Ketchup!
Cindy: Oh, you got me!
[Brenda laughs, but starts having a seizure, and falls over the couch. She stands up, still shaking and foaming at the mouth. She laughs]
Brenda: I can't believe you fell for that fake seizure!
Cindy: But it seemed so real!
Brenda: It did didn't it?
Cindy: And you peed!
[We see a puddle on the rug]
Brenda: Yeah! I really sold that shit, didn't I? I just love the look on your face when you are scared, girl! You are too easy!
[Her hand catches on fire, and she throws water on it. She removes a fake hand from her sleeve, laughing]
Brenda: . I got you with the old fake hand! I'm gonna get the rest of the popcorn...

Nick: [Playfully talking to his daughter through his pregnant wife's womb] First of all, this is your father speaking.
Kelly: [Amused] Yeah, she didn't know that.
Nick: You never know. I wish you can stay in there as long as you can because there's a lot of crazy ass people out here.
Kelly: Watch your language.
Nick: Your mother's a hard ass.
Kelly: I'm right here.
Nick: [jokingly ignoring Kelly] And daddy wants you to come out and be "daddy's little girl."

Brenda: Hey, Cindy! Look, I'm on TV, y'all! Check it out! I'm gonna give a shout out to all my peeps!
[Jigsaw turns round and slaps Brenda in the face]
Brenda: HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?
[bashing Jigsaw's face into the camara]
Brenda: NO ONE... BITCH SLAPS... BRENDA!
Saw: Zoltar, help!
[Zoltar comes in and hits Brenda over the head with a metal pipe]
Saw: Oh, oh! This is some bullshit!
[Brenda grabs the pipe and wacks Jigsaw with it before pushing Zoltar out of view]