20 Best Alisha Daniels Quotes

Alisha: [sees Simon filming] What? Do you want to have a look too?
Simon: [closes phone] No, thanks. I'm okay.
Nathan: [raises hand] Can I have another look?

Alisha: Were you sniffing my knickers?
Simon: You think I risked my life travelling through the dimensions of time so I could sniff your knickers?

Alisha: I've never thanked you. I wanted you to know. Thanks.
Simon: Why are you being so nice to me?
Alisha: I can be nice. Sometimes. Look, if I've ever been a bitch to you... I'm sorry.
Simon: I've never thought you're a bitch. Sometimes I think it's difficult for beautiful girls. People don't see past their looks.

Simon: Why are you being so nice to me?
Alisha: I can be nice... Look, if I've ever been a bitch to you, I'm sorry.
Simon: I've never thought you were a bitch. Sometimes I think it's difficult for beautiful girls. People don't see past their looks.

Alisha: Where are you going?
Simon: I'm going to kill Jesus.
Alisha: I'm coming with you.

Curtis: You think 'cause you're beautiful, you can treat people any way you want?
Alisha: Yeah, that's pretty much how it works. Haven't you figured that out yet?
Curtis: You're so messed up. And you don't even know it.

Alisha: You can't die. I love you.
Simon: I'll still be here.
Alisha: No, I don't love him. I love you!

Alisha: Er, if I was gonna suck someone's cock, trust me, it wouldn't be his.

Simon: We should set up a password that we can say to each other so we know it's us.
Nathan: 'Monkey slut'!
Alisha: We're not having 'monkey slut' as a password.
Nathan: What are the chances of that being brought up in a normal conversation? Kinda low, no?

Curtis: My mum told me to stay away from girls like you.
Alisha: Your mum has never met a girl like me.

Simon: Do you like food?
Alisha: Do I like food?
Simon: I mean, eating. We could go for a pizza, and some garlic dough balls.
Alisha: Are you asking me out?
Simon: [nods] I think about you. Not just since you...
Alisha: You think about me? Have you been wanking over me? If you wank over someone, wank over Kelly, yeah? Freak.
Simon: Why are you doing this to me?

Alisha: Do you want to walk in together? You don't have to if you're embarrassed to be seen with me.
Simon: I'd never be embarrassed to be seen with you.

Kelly: [in thick East Midlands accent] Ehm, wot makes ya thin' that yer better than ozz?
Nathan: What is *that* accent?
Alisha: Is that for real?
Kelly: Wot, you tryin' to say soomfin 'ou' it, then, yah?
Nathan: It's a -- are you -- that's just a noise! Are we supposed to be able to understand her?

Alisha: Why don't you go and suck yourself off?
Nathan: I wish I could. I can never reach it.

Alisha: You and me? Seriously? How is that ever gonna happen?
Simon: You fall in love with me.

Simon: You think I risked my life travelling through the dimensions of time so I could sniff your knickers?
Alisha: I don't know, did you?
Simon: No.

Alisha: Does something happen to us? Am I gonna die?
Simon: I'm not going to let that happen.

Alisha: Were you having a wank in there?
Nathan: So what if I was? A man can't enjoy a quick shuffle in his own coffin? It's not like I was expectin' visitors.

Curtis: One of your followers killed my girlfriend.
Simon: You're exploiting the vulnerable.
Kelly: You're taking money off people.
Alisha: Sexually assaulting girls
Elliot: Hey, that's the Catholic church for you.
Nathan: Hey, he's got a point. When I was growing up in Ireland, if the priests weren't fiddling with you, you were one of the ugly kids.

Nathan: Hey, hey, new guy! Sorry you got shot, man.
[Ollie swears at him]
Nathan: Hey, fuck you!
Curtis: What was that?
Alisha: He just got shot in the face, and you're insulting him?
Nathan: He made an obscene gesture! I don't care if he's dead; there's no excuse for rudeness!