The Best Heather Lisinski Quotes

Heather: I don't think this is such a good idea.
Jake: No choice.
Heather: Well, then, at least let me do some work on the car.
Jake: There's no time, I have to go now. Wha-wait, you said it was sturdy.
Heather: Well sturdy yeah but what if you need to out run something?
Jake: Why, how fast will it go?
Heather: I don't know, 30, maybe 40 miles an hour- best case, down hill- and not for very long. See this is what I'm saying. Maybe you should go on horseback.
Jake: A horse is slower than that.
Heather: A horse is less likely to explode.
Jake: I'll take my chances.
Heather: Ok, well then at least open her up easy, make sure you have enough car left in case you need to ask for a lot in a hurry. And remember, the gas tank on the thing is on the left hand side, so if somebody decides to start *shooting* at you, make sure it's not on that side.
Jake: Ok, anything else?
[she looks worriedly at him, then kisses him]
Heather: Come back in one piece.
[he chuckles]
Jake: I will, I promise.
[pause. She still has her arms around him]
Heather: I-I thought you were gonna go.
Jake: I'm waiting on Eric.
Heather: Oh.
[she pulls away]
Heather: Um, watch out for giant irradiated ants out there.
[he laughs]
Jake: Always do.
[uncomfortably]
Heather: Ooook.
[she leaves while Jake stares after her]

Heather: I shouldn't have sprung this on you. This is too weird.
Jake: What? What's weird?
Heather: [pause] Okay.
[awkward chuckle]
Heather: I kissed you. A month ago. And we haven't spoken since. Generally people speak after something like that.
Johnston: I'm just gonna... you know...
[turns sharply and walks away]

Jake: It's like everyone checks in here at the main tent. They try and match buyers and sellers. They gave me three possibilities of sellers that might have the part for the windmill.
Dale: It's like eBay.
[the group walks by a screaming man being whipped by a guard]
Heather: Not like eBay.

Stanley: I couldn't find an empty pesticide container so I though this water tank might do.
Heather: No no no, we can't use steel, there is to much risk of static. One spark and the whole thing could blow sky high.
Jake: We don't have time to look for something else!
Heather: We can't, well, who's gonna fill it?

[Jake has just saved Heather and a bus full of children]
Jake: What's your name?
Heather: Heather.
Jake: Jake.
[she smiles]
Heather: Nice to meet you Jake.
Jake: You too.

[Jake is setting dynamite charges to blow up the mine shaft]
Heather: Hey. Where'd you learn how to do that?
Jake: Knew a guy once.
[pause]
Heather: Did you blow him up?

Heather: Mind if I pitch in?
Jake: Do you know how to strip wires?
Heather: Ever since junior high.
[he stares at her]
Heather: Yeah, I was that popular.

[Emily has been hit by a powerline and is unconscious]
Lucas: Is she gonna wake up?
[firmly]
Heather: Yes.
Lucas: With super powers?
[pause]
Heather: Probly not.