The Best Colonel Becker Quotes

Col. Hogan: [raising his glass of wine] To your health.
Colonel: [raises his glass of wine] No, to... to your health.
[they drink]
Colonel: Mmm. Now, this an excellent wine.
Col. Hogan: How are things in downtown Siberia?
Colonel: Not like this. We don't serve wine.
Col. Hogan: If you served it at room temperature, you'd wind up with a Beaujolais popsicle.
Colonel: [laughs] When I punish a prisoner, I don't send him to the cooler, I send him to my quarters.
Col. Hogan: It's a shame you don't have Colonel Klink's setup; he'd turn down a transfer to the Riviera.
Colonel: I understand you have a rather good situation yourself.
Col. Hogan: *Me*? Just a country boy sweating out the war.
Colonel: You're too modest, Colonel. From your Gestapo dossier, I would say that you run the camp, and Klink is your prisoner.
Col. Hogan: Those boys at Gestapo headquarters are much too kind.
Colonel: You could be of great help to me.
Col. Hogan: In what way?
Colonel: I would like to transfer from the Russian Front to Stalag 13.
Col. Hogan: [sighs] German personnel assignments are little out of my line.
Colonel: Think about it. I might make it worth your while.