The Best Jaco Birch Quotes

Goldface: Hang on, didn't you knock over my operation in 2016?
Mark: Operation? Please, the place looked like a farmers market.
Barry: Can we settle this later?
Jaco: Yeah. You listen to the man, all right? This is a serious mission. We're gonna save lives today.
Goldface: Aren't you the fool that opened up an active volcano underneath Central City?
Mark: Oh, yeah, right after he killed my favorite bartender.
Jaco: I was cleared of those charges. You're not the smartest guy in the room.
Hartley: Exactly. I am. So if I could have everyone's attention, the plan...
Jaco: Your bar plays terrible music! Disco is dead, dude.

Goldface: [to Barry] Hang on. Something's rotten in Denmark. We left the city hours ago. How were you able to catch up with us? And why do we need to disable meta dampeners so you can do "forensics"?
Jaco: Dude, come on. Even I figured it out. Barry Allen's the Flash. They have the same Jitters order.
Goldface: Officer Chemist is the... yeah, no, I see it now.

Jaco: Flash, you gotta do something. I know this is all my fault. You and everyone in this city, my son, he can't die because of me. You gotta save him.
The: No, you have to save him. Look, I've got an idea. If it works, there'll be a huge release of pressure forming beneath us. When that happens, I need you to absorb the remaining heat.
Jaco: I've never done anything like that before.
The: You can do this. I know you can.

Jaco: Wait, so, saving hundreds of lives...
The: Try thousands.
Jaco: Saving that many lives is what I just did?
The: Yeah. Looks like you're the father Harold deserves after all.

Iris: So the Rogues' new partner is a speedster?
Jaco: Yeah. It was the scariest thing I've ever seen.
Barry: And it gets worse. He's using the negative speed, which is how he was able to dampen my speed for a few minutes.
Iris: Why would a speedster need a time machine?
Goldface: "And darkness and decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all."
Barry: Edgar Allan Poe.
Goldface: Then you know the story. Seven revelers at a masquerade, killed by the strangers in their midst.
Barry: Look, I know what you're all thinking. But this is about more than stealing tech now. This new speedster, I don't know who he is yet. I don't know what he wants to build a time machine. But Team Flash can't stop him on their own, especially how if he has his own Rogue army. I need your help. All of you.
Hartley: Barry, this is not what we signed up for.
Jaco: But... you know, I have a son to keep safe in this town. So I guess if you need me...
Goldface: Fine. I always did like a good underdog story.
Hartley: That, and if Central City gets leveled, you're out of business.
Goldface: I said I'd help.
Hartley: Find out who this guy is, find out his weakness, then call us.

Hartley: Flash is out by Route 119.
Jaco: Well, let's go get him right now.
Goldface: How do you suppose we do that? You got a teleporter we don't know about?
Allegra: Actually, I do.

The: Birch, your heating abilities, they're connected to the Earth beneath wherever you're standing.
Jaco: Uh, yeah, science is not my strong suit. But, yeah, okay. I'll buy that for a dollar.
Frost: He means emotionally.
Jaco: Ooh... right.

Fiddler: LIPS suck, by the way. You should try listening to a real band like Joy Division.
Jaco: They're very influential to the industrial metal scene.
Fiddler: Oh, don't bands-plain to me, hesher.
Jaco: I'm saying they inspired my new favorite band, Nine Inch Nails.
Fiddler: No way. That's my favorite band.
Jaco: Wait... what?
Fiddler: I like your jacket.
Jaco: I like your hair.
Fiddler: I like your chain wallet.

Batwoman: So, Flash, never been to Central City. Is it always this crazy?
The: Well...
Hartley: It's a Wednesday.