30 Best Dalton Quotes

Doc: Is this the part where you tell me what a great guy your friend is?
Wade: Not hardly. This is the part where I tell you I want you for myself.
Doc: [laughs]
Dalton: Oh, yo. Whatever he's saying, you can be fairly sure it's a lie.
Wade: [giving Dalton a look and her a longer look] Don't bet on it.

Dalton: Sorry, we're closed.
Ketchum: Then what are all these people doing here?
Dalton: Drinking and having a good time.
Ketchum: That's why we're here.
Dalton: You're too stupid to have a good time.

Emmett: It ain't the money ya understand, but if I don't charge ya somethin' the Presbyterians around here are likely to pray for my ruination. How does a hundred dollars a month strike ya?
Dalton: Fine.
Emmett: Can ya afford that much?
Dalton: If it keeps you in the good graces of the church.
Emmett: Ain't it peculiar how money seems to do that very thing?

Doc: You know, for that line of work I thought you'd be bigger.
Dalton: Gee, I've never heard that before.

Dalton: So, you play pretty good for a blind white boy.
Cody,: Yeah, and I thought you'd be bigger.

Morgan: What am I supposed to do?
Dalton: There's always barber college.

Frank: I got your plane ticket right here.
Dalton: I don't fly... too dangerous.

Frank: I need the best.
Dalton: Wade Garrett's the best
Frank: Wade Garrett's getting old.
Dalton: He's still the best!

Dalton: [after interrupting Denise's unsolicited striptease] If you're gonna have a pet, keep it on a leash.

Red: How long are you gonna be in town?
Dalton: Not very long.
Red: That's what I said 25 years ago.
Dalton: Really? What happened?
Red: I got married to an ugly woman. Don't ever do that. It just takes the energy right out of you. She left me, though. Found somebody even uglier than she was. That's life. Who can explain it?

Dalton: If somebody gets in your face and calls you a cocksucker, I want you to be nice. Ask him to walk. Be nice. If he won't walk, walk him. But be nice. If you can't walk him, one of the others will help you, and you'll both be nice. I want you to remember that it's a job. It's nothing personal.

Cody,: Man, this toilet is worse than the one that we worked in Dayton.
Dalton: Really?
Cody,: Oh man, it's a mean scene around here, man. There's blood on the floor of this joint every night.

Wade: What's the matter? Still living in the past, aren't ya? We're a long way from Memphis.
Dalton: Memphis has nothing to do with it.
Wade: BULLSHIT. That dog won't hunt. I can't believe you're still draggin' that shit around with ya. It seems to me, you'd be a little more... philosophical about it. AND CUT IT THE FUCK LOOSE. You know, that fucking cu-... that *girl* never told you she was married. DID SHE? And when a man sticks a gun in yer face, you got two choices; you can die or you can KILL THE MOTHERFUCKER.

Dalton: All you have to do is follow three simple rules. One, never underestimate your opponent. Expect the unexpected. Two, take it outside. Never start anything inside the bar unless it's absolutely necessary. And three, be nice.

Dalton: Take the biggest guy in the world, shatter his knee and he'll drop like a stone.

Doc: Do you always carry your medical record around with you?
Dalton: Saves time.

Brad: [sees Dalton looking at a man's picture] My grandfather.
Dalton: Looks like an important man.
Brad: He was an asshole. But *you*, you're a smart boy, aren't you, Dalton? You're just not too realistic. Christ, I'm just like you. I came up the hard way, from the streets of Chicago. You know, when I came to this town after Korea there was nothing. I brought the mall here. I got the 7-Eleven. I got the Fotomat here. Christ, JC Penney is coming here because of me. You ask anybody, they'll tell you.
Dalton: You've gotten rich off of the people in this town.
Brad: [laughs] You bet your ass I have. And I'm gonna get richer. I believe we all have a purpose on this earth. A destiny. I have a faith in that destiny. It tells me to gather unto me what is mine. But, Christ, you get paid for beating people up. Tell me you don't love it. Of course you do. You wouldn't be human if you didn't.

Morgan: You know, I heard you had balls big enough to come in a dump truck, but you don't look like much to me.
Dalton: Opinions vary.

[Dalton walks in on Steve having sex with a girl in the supply closet]
Dalton: Yo, Steve! You're history.
Steve: But I'm on my break!
Dalton: Stay on it.
Steve: Ah, shit!

Dalton: Problem?
Pat: There's no problem. Just a little mistake, that's all.
Dalton: What's that?
Pat: My job. You don't get it, do you?
Dalton: Why don't you explain it to me?
Tinker: [ready to fight] I'LL EXPLAIN IT TO YOU.
O'Connor: [to Tinker] Hey, shut up, shithead.
[to Dalton]
O'Connor: Mr. Tilghman's changed his mind. And that's all you need to know, son.
Dalton: No, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to know a little bit more than that.
O'Connor: Mr. Tilghman may own this bar, but the liquor he serves is supplied to him by BRAD WESLEY. Now, Pat McGurn is in the employ of Mr Wesley, his uncle. Not Mr Tilghman.
Pat: You see, I'm stayin', and YOU'RE GOIN'.
Dalton: Oh, really?

Emmett: I swear he does that just to piss me off!
Dalton: Who does?
Emmett: Brad Wesley!

Dalton: People who really want to have a good time won't come to a slaughterhouse. And we've got entirely too many troublemakers here. Too many 40-year-old adolescents, felons, power drinkers and trustees of modern chemistry.

Doc: Your file says you've got a degree from NYU. What in?
Dalton: Philosophy.
Doc: Any particular discipline?
Dalton: No. Not really. Man's search for faith. That sort of shit.
Doc: Come up with any answers?
Dalton: Not too many.
Doc: How's a guy like you end up a bouncer?
Dalton: Just lucky I guess.

Dalton: Nobody ever wins a fight.

Doc: Do you enjoy pain?
Dalton: Pain don't hurt.
Doc: Most of my patients would disagree with you.

Dalton: I want you to be nice until it's time to not be nice.

Dalton: You got quite a little enterprise going here.
Pat: What?
Dalton: You're going through a bottle every 30 minutes, you're skimming the till for 6 shots a bottle. On drafts, 1 every 10.
Dalton: [to Tilghman] I figure he's costing you about 150 a night.
Pat: [smiles at Dalton] So?
Dalton: So consider it severance pay. TAKE THE TRAIN.
Pat: [to Tilghman] I didn't hear you say that.
Frank: Well, I'm sayin' it now.
Pat: You sure?
Frank: GET OUT.

Morgan: [pointing angrily at Dalton] If you're not drinking, YOU'RE outta here!
Carrie: [to Dalton] Hey, don't let him bother you. Morgan was born an asshole and just grew bigger.
[introduces herself]
Carrie: I'm Carrie Ann. If you need anything...
[taps him on the shoulder]
Carrie: ANYTHING, you just let me know.
[Dalton nods]
Carrie: You got a name?
Dalton: Yeah.
Carrie: Well, what is it?
Dalton: Dalton.
Carrie: [laughing] Oh my God! Shit! I've heard of you!
Pat: [raps bar] Carrie Ann! What're you waiting for? Christmas? MOVE!
Carrie: [muttering] Ah shut up. I'm going. Jesus Christ.

Jimmy: Prepare to die.
Dalton: You are such an asshole.

Jimmy: Damn, boy. I thought you were good.
Dalton: Go fuck yourself.