The Best Darlene's Cousin Quotes

David: Oh my god! Oh my god!
'Back of the Line' Guy: Hey! Back of the line bro!
Darlene's: Hey, NO CUTTING!
David: Excuse me? This is my store! Who are you?
Darlene's: I'm Darlene's cousin! Who the fuck are you?
David: Oh my god! That kind of language folks will not be tolerated at the Rose Apothecary. This is supposed to be a safe place. A safe place.
[Walking over to Patrick]
David: So I just got verbally assaulted by an unsavory customer waiting in the line!
Patrick: I've got a hand it to you, David. Who knew that you had that many friends or family members for that matter?
David: What are we going to do? I, for one, blame Gwen for this...
Patrick: David, relax. You have nothing to worry about. just open the door.
David: Okay.
Patrick: Softly now!