50 Best Max Quotes

Terry: Max, I, uh, just got a call from my boss. Can you keep an eye on the twip 'til I get back?
Max: [playing an arcade game] No sweat. Help yourself, kid.
Matt: Thanks!

Terry: Are you nuts? This is the boys' locker room!
Max: Yeah I can smell the mildew.

Max: You're kidding, right? Real Sentries?
Terry: Yeah. And I've got the real bruises to prove it.
Max: Weird.
Terry: They said they were sent on a sacred mission by the wise one.
Max: Wise one? That's what Corey calls Simon Harper.
Terry: The guy who created the game?
Max: He invited Corey to come and meet him. Do you think there's a connection?
Terry: Is Jar-Jar lame?

Max: [Terry shows his receiver] That Batcave of yours is like one big toy chest, isn't it?

Max: Rough night?
Terry: Aren't they all?
Max: Maybe you need someone out there with you. You could do worse you know.
Terry: Forget it.
Max: Why should you have all the fun?
Terry: Max, it's not fun.
Max: What? Flying, intrigue power? Yeah, you're right. It's a drag.

Max: Isn't that just typical? A few strange unexplainable events, and right away, people start talking poltergeist.
Blade: How else do you explain the mangled lounge furniture, and the shop teacher's hair?
Max: The wind.
Dana: Well, a lot of people believe it was Garrison, come back from the dead to haunt us.
Max: [pulling up his yearbook picture] That's him? Ooh la la.
Dana: Top athlete in three sports. Lead guitarist in a band.
Blade: Not to mention drop-dead gorgeous. He can haunt my castle anytime.

Bruce: Where's Terry?
Max: I haven't seen him since last night.
Bruce: Where was he?
Max: Down the street at the subway station.

Terry: [on a stakeout] I'm glad you could come. It makes me look a little less conspicuous.
Max: [taking his napkin out of his collar and putting it in his lap] Right.
Terry: I've never see you in a dress before. You look good.
Max: I only make this sacrifice for Lobster Thermidor. This is on the boss man?
Terry: Every bite.
Max: Schway.

Max: [finding the front door of Donny's apartment unlocked] Hmm. The Grassos never were big on home security.
[entering]
Max: Mr. Grasso! Mrs. Grasso!
Terry: [seeing the mess inside] Looks like they're not big on cleaning, either.

Max: Am I glad you're back. I couldn't live another second without your charming repartee.
Zeta: I must remember to practice sarcasm.
[holding out a paper bag]
Zeta: Here. You must be hungry. Genoa and Swiss. Your fave.
Max: [eating] Why so nice all of a sudden?
Zeta: It is not all of a sudden. I have taken great care not to injure you.
Max: Being held hostage isn't exactly five-star treatment.

Terry: Hover VR?
Max: Pretty schway, huh? Total freedom of movement, total sensory immersion. Latest-gen.
Terry: Think this is what's frying kids' brains?
Max: Come on, Ter. If it was dangerous, you think they'd let kids do it? Anyway, we're here to investigate, aren't we?
Terry: *I'm* here to investigate. You had your chance with Donny's parents, and you blew it.
Max: Yeah, but I got us here, didn't I?

Max: So, the big guy's in Malaysia?
Batman: Yep. Taking care of some personal business.
Max: You do know they've just had a major typhoon in that area.
Batman: Yeah. No way for him to give me any orders. Now, ain't that a shame?
Max: Aren't you worried?
Batman: Believe me, Max, this is not a man you worry about.
Max: I wasn't talking about him.
Batman: Hey, I can handle Gotham for a few nights without his help.
[the Batmobile is fired upon]
Batman: Whoa! That almost scratched the paint job.

Terry: Actually, it turned out pretty good. Tamara and her parents were put under protective custody. Not only do they end up in a better place, but they got doctors to help her with her powers.
Max: You think she's doing okay?
Terry: [seeing a vision of Tamara waving] Oh, yeah. I've got a feeling she's doing just fine.

Terry: I guess we don't say "hi" anymore.
Jared: Oh, Terry, sorry. I was thinkin' about stuff.
Max: I bet. Where does the man who has everything put it all?
Jared: What is your problem?
Max: Take it easy. I was just kidding.
Jared: [to Terry as she leaves] Sorry. Sometimes, she really ticks me off.

Max: Nothing like a visit to Donny's to make me appreciate my own mom and dad.
Terry: I know what you mean. Now let's see where Donny was spending his creds.
[Max inserts the card into a hand-held device]
Terry: Vrroom?
Max: VR Room. It's an arcade downtown. Donny was spending his creds escaping reality.
Terry: [dryly] Can't imagine why.

Max: How do you do it?
Batman: Do what?
Max: This hero thing.
Batman: It's easier for me. I got the suit.
Max: No. How do you save the world... AND NOT TELL ANYBODY?
Batman: I can tell you. You can tell me. That's why I'm glad you found out... partner.

Max: [finding Mutro's bomb] I found it!
Batman: Can you disarm it?
Max: If I had some help.
Batman: [avoiding swipes from Curare's sword] You're on your own, Max.

Max: [being held hostage] Help! In here! Somebody help me!
Zeta: Go ahead. No one can hear you. Now, let's go over everyone you know at school again, and this time, be more thorough.

Mr. Groote: [Scolding Howard] What in blazes did you buy with it? Dynamite? Dynamite to blow up the house with?
Max: I think Howard need some quality time with his old folks.
Terry: You think they'll ground him?
Mr. Groote: [Last lines] Your mother's antique doll collection!

Terry: Your whole family lives here?
Max: "Whole family" is just me and my sister most of the time. The folks split up when I was a kid. And mom's on the road a lot for work. I guess you and I both have our secrets. Except mine seems kind of pathetic right now.
Terry: Hey, at least you don't have to wear tights.

Max: Killer move, Corey. How'd you peg it?
Corey: Gotta go with your instincts.
Terry: Good instincts. You just bagged the all-time high score.
Corey: Yes!
Max: No fair. You musta logged a gazillion hours on that game.
Corey: Maybe more. But for the first time, I really felt it, you know? Like I actually was a Sentry of the Last Cosmos.
[bumping into Nelson]
Corey: Ahh! Hey, watch it!
Nelson: Or what? You gonna bop me with a flaming sword? Get a life.

Batman: You can't live your life in a fantasy world.
Max: Why not? What's so great about reality?

Terry: Hey, Max, what are you doing here?
Max: Playing "Fragatron 3000". The games here kick.
Matt: See? I told you.
Max: Who's the twip?
Terry: My brother Matt. Max is in my genetics class.
Matt: [not listening] Cool! They have "Death Ray Buckaroos"!
Terry: [getting pulled away] Later.

Terry: How was Sentrycroft?
Corey: Okay, I guess.
Max: Okay? Come on, give! That's a hard place to crash. What's it like?
Terry: Yeah, come on, Sentry! Report.
Corey: It's just a joke to you, isn't it, McGinnis? Well, that's all it was. A joke. A big nothing, okay?
Max: [to Terry, as Corey backs his bike up and speeds away] What now, O wise one?

Max: [after hearing about the influence of genetics on behavior] But, what about free will? I mean, I'm not going to believe that everything I am was completely decided before I was born.

Zeta: I was programmed to maintain the secrecy of my own existence. Anyone I replaced saw what I was and could never be set free.
Max: But you didn't want to kill this terrorist guy?
Zeta: He was not a terrorist. His associates were terrorists. He was an accountant.
Max: So, he was innocent.
Zeta: Yes, but that is not why I spared him. Replacing him required that I live with his family. I watched them experience life. I saw his daughter ride a bicycle for the first time. I could not deprive her father of seeing her grow just because he knew I existed.
Max: Wow.
Batman: So, why the high school?
Zeta: I needed computers and electronic equipment. Compared to a government site, a school has little security.
Max: And once you saw who's who at the school, I was the natural choice. Who'd look twice at me spending all day at the lab?

Max: Dana, what's up?
Dana: Thought you might need a ride to Winn's study group tonight.
Max: No, thanks. I'll see you there.
Dana: You know where Winn lives, right?
Max: I'll get directions from her.
Dana: [giggling] Him. You said "her". Winn's a guy.
Max: Sorry. Concentrating.
Dana: What else is new?

Max: [noticing Terry is absent from school] He's probably sick, that's all.
Dana: He seemed fine last night.
Max: Yeah, but you never know what you might wake up with.
Dana: That's what I'm worried about.

Bruce: You're not coming. I won't let you.
Max: Aren't you forgetting something? I saved you tonight, not the other way around.
Bruce: You're good - better than I thought - but this isn't about you.
Max: What, then?
Bruce: I don't know whether Terry's dead or alive, and that's enough for my conscience.
Max: Mr. Wayne, with all due respect, your conscience don't mean diddly to me, so I'm just gonna go right ahead and...
Bruce: [seeing construction on the platform where Terry vanished] There's no way into the shelter now, unless...
Max: Unless what?
Bruce: Unless I distract them for you.
Max: You mean now you want me to...
Bruce: Yes. But be careful.

Terry: It's me. Yeah, she's fine. I'm letting her rest a bit and then...
[he gets hit over the head]
Terry: Uhhn!
Bruce: Terry!
Max: Whoever you are, when he wakes up, tell him I'm sorry.

Terry: Hey, workaholic, let's get some chow. Genoa and Swiss. Your fave.
Max: Thanks, Terry, but I have a lot to do. Maybe see you after school?
Terry: You kidding? With what's been going on, the night job's been full-time lately. In fact, I could use your help covering with Dana.
Max: Sure. What does she need?
Terry: [suspicious, then dropping it] Know what? I just remembered I'm free. I will see you after school.

Terry: I've been looking all over for you.
Dana: Look somewhere else. As far as you're concerned, I'm not here.
Chelsea,25898: Ooh.
Terry: Listen, I'm sorry. Mr. Wayne needed me again last night. I... I don't blame you for being mad.
Dana: Mad? Ter, I am way beyond mad. I've tried to be patient.
Terry: And you've been great. You've always been there for me.
Dana: So what do I get in return? Broken dates, broken promises. You care more about your dumb job than you do about me.
Terry: Dana, I have responsibilities now. My mom and brother depend on me. What do you want?
Dana: Someone who occasionally will be there for me.
Terry: [trying to follow as she leaves] Dana, wait.
Chelsea: Uh-uh. Girl time.
Max: Too bad you can't tell Dana what you've really been doing at night.

Terry: Ford, Carter, Reagan, Bush, Clinton... I don't know.
Max: Come on. Clinton was the fun one, then came the boring one.
Terry: They're all boring.

Terry: Charlie was 18, and I was 14. My folks were breaking up and he and I were... being angry kids. Busting windows, shoplifting... and one day Charlie decided to prove himself to this big gang and he... dragged me along on a heist. I didn't even know what we were doing when he climbed in the window.
Max: But you went in, too.
Terry: Never said I was bright. Next thing I knew, the cops were shouting "Freeze" and I was doing 90 days in juvie. That was a slap on the wrist next to Charlie. He was in prison for 3 years.
Max: And that's why you've been running around with guilt ever since he rolled into town. You don't owe him anything.
Terry: He's my friend, Max, and he's gonna die if I don't do something.
[Starts to walk away]
Max: You can't bring him to his senses. He has to do that himself.
Terry: Maybe I can at least keep him alive until he does.

Dana: [after hearing Cynthia casually dismiss Nelson's accident] Brr.
Max: That girl's subarctic.

Batman: Max, what are you doing?
Max: Go away. You wouldn't understand.
Batman: I understand Spellbinder's got you hooked and you're stealing for him.
Max: So what?
Batman: So, keep at it and you'll end up a veg. Listen to me!
Max: You don't have a clue how good it feels, Terry. Everybody wants you in there. And the second you're back out here, your whole body hurts for more. I just wanna get back inside.
Batman: It's an addiction, Max. He's messed up your brain chemistry. Come on, let me help you.
Max: If you wanna help me so much, then leave me alone.

Max: Here's the bio and civics.
Nelson: Thanks, hon. How about the math?
Max: It's coming. Stop nagging.
Terry: I get it. You're doing his homework so you don't have to take care of the baby.
Max: We opted for the traditional marriage: one breadwinner, one homemaker.
Nelson: Beats algebra.

Bruce: Go home.
Max: Listen, I could be very valuable to you. In fact, I've already been very valuable, more times than I can count.
Bruce: I said go home.
Max: Make me.

Max: The e-mail must have been the last straw.
Terry: I knew her dad had issues with her, but I didn't think...
Max: He probably figured the ranch would straighten her out.
Dana: Straighten her out? How could anyone think Chelsea deserves to be in the same place as a kid like Sean?
Max: I got another one for you. What kind of place would admit a normal kid like Chelsea? Makes you wonder, doesn't it?
Dana: Somebody should look into that ranch.
Max: [pointedly to Terry] Yeah. Somebody.

Bennet: Zeta. Going back to school?
Max: [seeing undercover agents draw their weapons] Remind me never to tick off the phone company.

[in the Batmobile]
Max: Ouch! Could you get your ear out of my eye?
Batman: I warned you, the Batmobile wasn't built to carry two people.
Max: All those billions, and you'd think that he could afford a back seat.

Dana: He's not sick, Max. I just called his house, and he hasn't been there all day.
Max: All day? Maybe Mr. Wayne had an emergency. You know how old people are.
Dana: But why wouldn't he call?
Max: [hearing a knock on the door] Dana, I gotta go. Somebody's here.
Dana: If it's Terry...
Max: Yeah, I will.

Max: Specs on this model say the signal has a range of only two miles.
Batman: Well, how does that help us find the bomb?
Max: This is why you should try to pay attention in geometry, McGinnis. Look: he reset the timer once here, where you met him; he was going to meet you at the park, so he would have had to set it there. And he must have set it at least once from the hotel...
[the radii from the 3 points overlap in only one small area]
Max: And voila! Math is once again your friend.

Max: I think Howard needs some quality time alone with his folks.
Terry: You think they'll ground him?

Max: I can't believe my dad took both key cards.
Bellboy: Not a problem, miss.
[letting her in, he clears his throat and indicates the tool in his hand]
Max: Oh, uh...
Bellboy: [she swipes her cash card] Thank you, miss!
Max: [shutting the door behind him] There goes my lunch money.

Chelsea: [seeing a news report] Ugh, there goes my appetite.
Max: Reality check, Chels. That's just a load of media hype. An urban legend.
Chelsea: I don't know, Max. Remember that girl Sally who disappeared last month? Maybe giant rats got her.
Dana: The only giant rat around here is Terry McGinnis.
Chelsea: He blipped you off again?
Dana: Big time.

Max: Got mail?
Corey: [opening it] Oh, my god!
Max: [looking over his shoulder] What?
Corey: It's from Simon Harper!
Max: The guy who created the Sentries? No way!
Corey: Yeah! The-the great wise one himself. He's like a god, and he's inviting me to Sentrycroft.
Max: To where?
Corey: His private estate. Nobody goes there!
Max: So what's he want with you?

Terry: Check this out.
Max: Handprints? They don't look big enough to knock over lockers.
Terry: No fingerprints, either.
Max: Maybe he wore gloves or something.
[hearing guys heading towards them, she gets into a locker to hide]
Max: Ter, you gotta get me out of here.
Terry: How?
Max: I don't know. Think of something.
Terry: I'll let Mr. Silverstein know you'll be late.
Max: You are so dead, McGinnis.

Terry: Let me see if I got all this: Jurgen is breaking up with Blade so he can see Chris, but Chris is interested in Eric, who doesn't want to date anybody. Now wait a minute, that doesn't sound like Eric to me.
Max: It's not. You're thinking of the other Eric.
Terry: Aw, man, there's two of them now?
Max: See how important these little updates are? Without them, people would start wondering why you don't know what's going on at school anymore.
Terry: I should just tell them I'm busy chasing renegade synthoids and living heads.
Max: They wouldn't believe it.
Terry: Neither do I.

Bruce: [watching DAK leave] Where's he going?
Terry: Told me he was headed for home.
Bruce: Good.
Terry: Said he'd find me and kill me if I ever told anyone he cried. Does Max have any idea what happened?
Bruce: As a matter of fact, I spent most of the evening with her.
Terry: Really? Then the two of you must have finally come to an understanding.
Bruce: You could say that.
Max: [being led away after Bruce's distraction double-cross] You can't do this to me! It's not fair! I'll sue!