The Best Dr. Edward Pilson Quotes

Sheldon: [Dr. Pilson shows Sheldon part of a psychological test] A lion sitting in a chair, holding a pipe.
Dr. Edward Pilson: Good. But what do you think is on his mind?
Sheldon: How should I know? Maybe he's wondering why he's posing for a silly picture instead of eating a gazelle.
Dr. Edward Pilson: Anything else?
Sheldon: What exactly are we doing here? I thought the purpose of this study was to find out how smart I am.
Dr. Edward Pilson: That's what we're doing, but there are different kinds of intelligence.
Sheldon: Poppycock!

Dr. Edward Pilson: Okay, Sheldon, this first battery of tests measures basic problem-solving abilities.
Sheldon: Is the Kaufman test or the Wechsler Intelligence Scale?
Dr. Edward Pilson: Are you familiar with those?
Sheldon: It's embarrassing, but I enjoy a little light reading in the bathroom.