Top 50 Quotes From Michelle Tanner

Michelle: Is it okay to cry?

Danny: Now there are two candies, one of you gets the cherry and the other one gets a nut cluster.
Michelle: Nuts make me gag.
Danny: Steph, you can stomach your nuts, right?
Steph: Oh sure, punish the one with the good digestion system.

Michelle: Are you Annette Funny Jello?
Annette: Something like that.

Joey: [Michelle shows Rigby and the kids at the mall her midget Rigby] Hold it up, we can't see it!
Michelle: I AM holding it up!
Denise: I was going to take mine to show and tell, but there's NOTHING to show!
Stephanie: You know, Rigby, you don't just rip off kids' money, you rip off their dreams. How do you sleep at night? Especially with that big horn?

Danny: [outraged that Shorty's head is in its place of General Cornwall's portrait] Great-Granddaddy Cornwall!
Jesse: You know, I'm finally starting to see the family resemblance.
[Danny takes Shorty's head from the portrait]
Michelle: Shorty, how could you?
Danny: That's it! He's out of here!
[starts towards the front door]
Joey: Danny, where are you going?
Danny: [yelling outside] Anybody wanna buy a donkey?
Jesse: Danny, nobody wants to buy a donkey.
Michelle: I did.
Danny: [yelling outside] All right, anybody want a FREE donkey?
Female: [from outside] Shut up, Tanner! I'd rather hear the donkey!
Becky: [drags Danny inside] Danny, come in here. The neighbors are armed and cranky.

Michelle: Hi Pete!
Pete: Hi Michelle. Isn't it your bed time?
Michelle: I don't know, I can't tell time.

Stephanie: I've turned the bathtub into a water bed, the sink into a wet bar, and I'm thinking of turning the toilet into a loveseat.
Danny: [enters the bathroom] Girls, what's going on?
Michelle: Stephanie lives in the potty now.
Danny: We'll see about that.

Michelle: [Stephanie is shoving a pile of leaves off her bed] Hey! Those're the ones with the little bugs on them.
Stephanie: Bugs? That does it!
[grabs trash bag]
Stephanie: Dumb hobby coming down!
[throws it out the window]

Danny: That's Annette Funicello, I watched her all the time on the Mickey Mouse Club.
Michelle: That lady knows Mickey Mouse?
[to Joey]
Michelle: Give me back my autograph book!

Michelle: We missed you, Grandpa!
Papouli: You remember last time I was here? I told you to call me Papouli. Grandpa means someone who is old and gray
Michelle: What does Papouli mean?
Papouli: In Greece, it means someone who is old and gray, but it sounds so much better!

Jesse: Michelle, do you really care if the inside of the chimney is clean?
Michelle: Yes I do, and so does Santa Claus.
Stephanie: She's totally brainwashed!
Michelle: EVERYTHING should be washed!

Lisa: Michelle, I heard you and Teddy broke up.
Sophia: Did he break your heart?
Michelle: I thought so, but it just turned out to be gas.

Michelle: Howie no bye-bye!
[looking sad]
Michelle: Howie no bye-bye

Steph: [while playing cards with Grandpa Nick] I'll see your Flintstones' and raise you three Hello Kittys. Let's see what you got.
Nick: Seven kings. Beat that.
Steph: Seven aces.
Michelle: [puts her cards on the table] Bingo.

Steph: You think you're so cute.
Michelle: Don't worry... Be happy.
Steph: Oh no! You ARE so cute!

Danny: Sounds like you were trying to be the boss.
Michelle: The princess *is* the boss.
Danny: *Bruce Springstein* is the boss.

Becky: [Jesse reveals he knew the party was a baby shower] You did?
[looks at Michelle]
Becky: I wonder who told you?
Michelle: I have no idea.
[to 2 bikers]
Michelle: Excuse me boys,
[walks into the kitchen with Becky and Jesse behind her]
Becky: Freeze, munchkin! Did you tell Uncle Jesse our little secret?
Michelle: I'm sorry, but the man had ice cream!
Becky: [to Jesse] You *bribed* her with ice cream?
Michelle: And chocolate fudge, and whipped cream, and a cherry!
Becky: Oh that's low.
Jesse: Oh and going behind my back about this baby shower, that wasn't low?
Michelle: If I'm not in trouble, can I go back to the party?
Becky: Sure.
Michelle: Thanks.
[walks, stops, turns back]
Michelle: Oh yeah, and he had sprinkles too.
[rolls eyes]

Michelle: I'm not leaving. Steph is a total slob. So I decided to move in with you. Feels good doesn't it?
D.J. Tanner: No, Stephanie's not bad, she's just becoming a teenager. It's a tough time, I went through it, you're gonna go through it and take it from a voice of experience. The best place to go through it is in your own room.
Michelle: How about I go through it in your room.

Michelle: I need a window seat otherwise I gag.
Steph: I thought nuts made you gag.
Michelle: Two things can make you gag.
Steph: [watching DJ and Steve kiss] No Michelle, three things can make you gag.

Danny: Michelle is getting an academic foundation that's going to carry her through grades K through 12, through college, through Harvard law school. Jess, you have robbed our nation of one of the finest legal minds the supreme court has ever known.
Michelle: I gotta go potty.

Michelle: Who can I bother?
[Screams]
Michelle: DJ!

Michelle: First we're happy, then we're sad, now we're happy again, WHAT is GOING ON?

Joey: [when he undoes his belt after eating Becky's meatloaf] That is about a four-notcher on the old belt, let me tell you.
Michelle: Should I consider that an apology or a compliment?
Stephanie: You should consider that a reason to stay single.

Michelle: Oh, Stephanie.
Charles: Oh, look. It's half a person.
Michelle: You've got a bad attitude.
Stephanie: What is it, Michelle? We're studying.
Michelle: You're in big trouble with Dad.
[Charles looks up]
Michelle: Big, big, big, big, big, big, big...
Stephanie: Okay, okay. I get it. What did I do?
Michelle: You forgot to take the garbage out again.
Stephanie: [cringes] Uh-oh.
Michelle: Dad said he'll deal with you later. Just thought you'd like to know.
[walks out]
Charles: Well, I guess you're really in for it now, huh?
Stephanie: Tsss, yeah. That's twice this week. My dad's gonna flip out on me.
Charles: Well, you know what helps? Try thinking of a funny movie you like... like Home Alone or Roger Rabbit. That's what I always do when I'm getting it.
Stephanie: Getting what?
Charles: Well, you know, when your dad's pounding you.

Michelle: Can I ask you a question?
Danny: Sure, anything.
Michelle: You're my dad, right?
Danny: Yeah, that's right.
Michelle: So, where's my mom?
[the whole family pauses, looking very sad]
Danny: [in sorrow] I'm sorry, uh... but your mom died when you were just a little girl.
Michelle: So even if I do get better, I won't remember her?
Joey: Well, Michelle, we'll tell you anything about her you want to know.
Michelle: Was she pretty?
Jesse: Michelle, she was very pretty. You see, your mommy was my sister. And you know what? You look just like her.

D.J. Tanner: [opens up a magazine] Now, you're never too young to learn who's cute and who's not.
[walks over to a poster on her closet]
D.J. Tanner: Now Michelle, this is.
Michelle: Cute.
D.J. Tanner: He was cute when he was with . He's graduated to rad.
Michelle: Rad.
D.J. Tanner: [walks back over to the bed and opens the magazine they were just looking at] Now, this is Michael J. Fox. The bad news is: he's married. The good news is: he's our size. Now, out of all these pictures, pick the cutest guy.
Michelle: [looks at the magazines, then looks down at her picture book] Big Bird
[points at the picture]
Michelle: .
D.J. Tanner: Big Bird? No one even knows if he's a guy.

Danny: All right, everybody, Cindy and Rusty are gonna be here any minute. Size places, please, let's go. Jesse, please stand up straight.
Jesse: What is this, a Julie Andrews movie?
Joey: Hey, go with it, Jess. Do!
Jesse: [singing] A deer, a female deer!
Joey: Re!
Jesse: [singing] A drop of golden sun!
Danny: I know you're all having fun, but this is very important to me.
Joey: Mi!
Jesse: [singing] A name I call myself!
Danny: This has gone too far. I know -
[sings]
Danny: Fa, a long, long way to run!
Jesse: [singing] So, a needle pulling thread!

Michelle: Boys, they won't buy you flowers.
D.J. Tanner: They won't make a commitment.
Kimmy: They won't squat in Jell-o for you.
[the others look at her]
Kimmy: Hey, don't knock it till you try it.

Michelle: You could look into my eyes and say something nice about me.
Teddy: [glares at her] You have a nice head.
Teddy: Thank you, nice heads run in my family.

Michelle: I liked the Rippers better when Uncle Jesse was in it.
Jesse: Thanks, munchkin.
Michelle: And before they had a hit song, and before they got famous, and before they're opening for the stones...
Jesse: They're opening for the Stones?
Michelle: Only on the West Coast.
Joseph: Michelle, I think that's all the help he can get.

Michelle: [Michelle and Steph are looking out their bedroom window watching Shorty disturbing the neighborhood] Do you think the neighbors can hear him?
Female: [from outside, angrily] Whatever that is, I'm gonna shoot it!
[Michelle now has a fearful expression]
Stephanie: I'm guessing they can.

Michelle: What are you making for breakfast?
Danny: Something to go. We're late.
Michelle: But I want Belgian waffles, apple-smoked bacon and sourdough toast, lightly buttered.
Stephanie: Yeah, and I want straight A's, world peace and Brad Pitt, lightly buttered.
Danny: No buttered bread and definitely no buttered Brad.

Michelle: [after meeting Steve Urkel] Why you talk like Mickey Mouse?
Steve: That's 'cause I was born in Chicago.

Michelle: [about the school's Valentine's Day dance] This will be great, it'll be like MTV with a milk break.

Stephanie: I'm not sharing a room with this 4 year old kindergarten baby.
Michelle: I'm 4 and 3 quarters!

Michelle: Daddy sleeps loud!

Jesse: [after he brings Michelle back home, she beams over her bedroom... until he sits her down for a chat] It's time for one of our little talks. Now, what you did today was very wrong.
Michelle: I know. I should've never touched your stuff; my music stinks anyway.
Jesse: [chuckles in spite of himself] Well, that's true, but I'm talking about your running away.

Stephanie: Michelle pinched me!
Jesse: Michelle, that wasn't nice.
Michelle: You said I could.
Jesse: That was because Aaron took your cookie.
Michelle: Stephanie took my lamp.
Jesse: Yeah but that's different, in one case someone took something of yours which was wrong, and in the other... someone took something of yours, which was also wrong...
[Stephanie raises an eyebrow at him]
Jesse: Oh boy...

Denise: [to Teddy] She's really cute.
Denise: [to Henry] Can we keep her?
Michelle: I'm a fun girl.
Henry: Well, until we get things straightened out, you're welcome to stay here.
Michelle: Thanks, New Dad!

Michelle: [setting up her kiddie pool in the kitchen] Surfs up, dude!
D.J. Tanner: Surfs up, dude? Your time is up, dudette. DAD!

Michelle: I want my ouce cream.
D.J. Tanner: You want your ice cream.
Michelle: That's what I said, don't you listen?

Michelle: How can I stop myself from crying?
Stephanie: Think of something funny, like when Joey stuffs a whole donut in his mouth.

Michelle: My daddy told me that if you have nothing nice to say, you shouldn't say anything at all. Well, my daddy's not here, and you're a weanie!

Michelle: [to Uncle Jesse] If I feel sad, I might cry, and I can't be brave... for you.

Michelle: I cannot go outside, *Dad* said.
D.J. Tanner: Well Dad's not here. I'm in charge, that makes me Dad.
Stephanie: Until the real Dad comes back and makes you grounded.

Michelle: I can't wait for the surprise.
Stephanie: I hope it fits in the car.
Danny: Girls, we're here to see D.J. It doesn't matter what she brought us. Isn't Spain noted for their leather goods?
[Most of the family members nod yes]

Michelle: May I have that cupcake, please?
Stephanie: No, you may not.
Michelle: But I was polite and I said please.
Stephanie: I was polite, too; I said, "No, you may not."
Michelle: Guess what? Politeness Week is over!
[grabs Stephanie's cupcake and runs off, followed by Stephanie]
Stephanie: How rude!

Michelle: The doggie ate my ouce-cream!

Daniel: You remember me?
Papouli: Of course I do! Joey!
Daniel: No, I'm Danny.
Joseph: I'm Joey.
Papouli: Of course you are!
[turns to D.J]
Papouli: And little Stephanie!
Donna Jo 'D.J.' Margaret Tanner: No, I'm D.J.!
Papouli: Of course you are!
[turns to hug Stephanie]
Papouli: And little Michelle!
Stephanie: I'm Stephanie.
Michelle: I'm little Michelle.
Papouli: [turns to Michelle] Of course you are!
[turns to Steve]
Papouli: And... I have no idea who you are.
Michelle: You don't know who any of us are.

Michelle: [Jesse is shopping with Stephanie and Michelle] Billy Bunny cereal! I gotta have it!
[runs towards it]
Jesse: Ho-ho-hold it. Hold it, Michelle. Now, look, just because there's some wacky cartoon character on the box doesn't mean the product's any good.
[notices a display of Elvis peanut butter jars]
Jesse: Oh, my god, Elvis peanut butter.
Stephanie: Uncle Jesse, isn't that the same as Billy Bunny cereal?
Jesse: No, it is not. Elvis is a man, not a cartoon.