The Best Odessa Cleveland Quotes

Frank: [bombs heard in background] I hope we're giving it to 'em good, those little yellow reds.
Hawkeye: Frank, you better take two yellow reds and go to sleep.
Frank: Oh, you like getting shot at, Dr. Goody Two-Shoes?
Hawkeye: I just don't know why they're shooting at us. All we want to do is bring them democracy and white bread, transplant the American Dream: freedom, achievement, hyperacidity, affluence, flatulence, technology, tension, the inalienable right to an early coronary sitting at your desk while plotting to stab your boss in the back. That's entertainment!
Frank: Pierce, you are certifiably insane.
Hawkeye: Gee, I can't understand why. Here I am, 20,000 miles from home working as an extra in a war movie with this guy's blood dripping into my boot. Nurse, you want to do something about that, or must I kiss you into submission?
Lt. Ginger Bayliss: Right away, doctor.
Hawkeye: That's not insane-making, Frank. Neither is bedding down every night with a flea circus, or eating food prepared by a cook who used to make box lunches for Kamikaze pilots, or getting so bored out my skull, I put on my dress uniform for a trip to the latrine!
Frank: Will you watch your language?
Margaret: There are nurses present.
Hawkeye: Oh, forgive me. I'd like to offer the nurses a blanket apology. Or even better, I'd like to offer them a blanket invitation.
Frank: Smut merchant.
Henry: Oh, pipe down, Burns.
Frank: Oh sure, always. You jump all over me, but he can say what he wants, and he gets away with it. Colonel's pet, that's what you are!
Hawkeye: I'll get you at recess!

Gen. Wilson Spaulding Barker: Nurse, is everybody around here crazy?
Lt. Ginger Bayliss: Everybody who's sane is, sir.

Capt. Benjamin Franklin Hawkeye Pierce: 3-0 silk.
Lt. Ginger Bayliss,: [Handing it to him] 3-0 silk.
Capt. Benjamin Franklin Hawkeye Pierce: Suture scissors.
Lt. Ginger Bayliss,: Suture scissors.
Capt. Benjamin Franklin Hawkeye Pierce: Snoo.
Lt. Ginger Bayliss,: Snoo? What's snoo?
Capt. Benjamin Franklin Hawkeye Pierce: Nothing much. What's new with you?